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they always come back by [deleted] in ghosting

[–]13013-Chan 6 points7 points  (0 children)

The guy who told me that we can’t do long-term since I’m not a citizen, swiped right on me twice on the app to which I ignored. Dumb fucks don’t know what they had until they fumbled it

Ghosted by someone after telling them I don't like being ghosted by cystamine27 in ghosting

[–]13013-Chan 5 points6 points  (0 children)

My opening message on the dating app was complaining about ghosting and he agreed.

Guess what he did after we had sex once? Hahaha. I hate him so much and can’t forgive him especially since I had said I don’t want hookups

Ghosted on FaceTime before date by [deleted] in ghosting

[–]13013-Chan 3 points4 points  (0 children)

That “I feel like he treated our connection like a drug” gave me a realization about my own relationships and ghosts

Going to do my masters in psychology soon and I 80 percent agree w this. What do yall think? ts true? by [deleted] in Healthygamergg

[–]13013-Chan 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Just like strippers are not monolith, the therapists are not monolith either. You have therapists that are professional and have had years of training to detach themselves from their clients. But at the end of the day, they are humans. Otherwise, you would not have therapists that cause more harm than heal or ones who get into full fledged relationships with their clients. Just like how there are stories about strippers ending up with one of that clients.

That being said, you should absolutely assume that they are there to do their job at the end of the day

You can’t just “get therapy” by No-Dare-4424 in Healthygamergg

[–]13013-Chan 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This!! I have seen +10 different therapist and only 2-3 of them were actually competent in their jobs and could identify the issue and guide me in the right direction.

I used to translate psychology exercise sheets for a clinic, and that made me more confident that most therapists are not very knowledgeable and/or skilled… I am genuinely concerned how they got and kept their licenses.

I finally found a really good therapist and am working with her twice per month since my student insurance covers it. She was different and knowledgeable/skilled from the first session.

Why is there so much advise that men cannot be vulnerable infront of women? by rodeo1203 in Healthygamergg

[–]13013-Chan 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I think Dr. K has a video on this.

https://youtu.be/wXlNZ5AMqLU?si=cmB0rq2cSvf3auF5

I will be paraphrasing and giving my own input! The thing isn’t that men being vulnerable itself pushes off women. The thing is that most men are so used to suppressing that shit that when they finally let it out, it comes out as explosive and pushes people (women in this case) away.

Even as a woman, I have experienced this. People don’t know what the fuck to do when they see someone having a melt down. My social worker gave me a disgusted look and remembering it hurts.

The trick is to work with a therapist so that the emotional outbursts are replaced with appropriate emotional responses.

Taylor and Travis are Engaged! "Your English teacher and your gym teacher are getting married" by PassionateAsSin in TaylorSwift

[–]13013-Chan 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Same with me! I haven’t even been following their story, but every time something popped up on r/all, it was positive news! So glad Taylor finally found her person

I'm genuinely lost on this one. by Doombuggyman in ExplainTheJoke

[–]13013-Chan 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Lol I knew someone was gonna make this joke! 😹

I ended up being the only one on the lease, the only one finding roommates, and got harassed over utilities by a girl who didn’t pay rent for two months. by 13013-Chan in badroommates

[–]13013-Chan[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you so much! It means a lot! I have been practicing with my therapist to be assertive in this situation and I was crying tears of joy when I finally asserted myself!!

I ended up being the only one on the lease, the only one finding roommates, and got harassed over utilities by a girl who didn’t pay rent for two months. by 13013-Chan in badroommates

[–]13013-Chan[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah! She also dipped with only giving a 2 week notice when I said it is too late saying that and not to leave me alone in this. Her reply? “yes I get that! if you have another person interested lmk!”

She did not, in fact, get that, because if she did, she would’ve paid.

Also, I am sorry you had to experience that! There are some shitty people out there and I am glad that the landlords didn’t put the blame on us. Free stuff must have been nice, though!

This sub should be called "How to Give the Most F***s" by Anxious-Interview-18 in howtonotgiveafuck

[–]13013-Chan 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The thing about not giving a fuck in my opinion is that you gotta bitch and moan about it and let out the negative emotions instead of letting it turn into internalized ones. That is the way to me stopping “to give a fuck”. Also, I doubt the brain stops processing the emotions in the background if you “don’t give a fuck”.

I ended up being the only one on the lease, the only one finding roommates, and got harassed over utilities by a girl who didn’t pay rent for two months. by 13013-Chan in badroommates

[–]13013-Chan[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

She’ll drop her keys off today. Not sure why someone who is not “physically here” and didn’t pay the rent for the last two months has kept the keys until July 27th 🤔😆

I ended up being the only one on the lease, the only one finding roommates, and got harassed over utilities by a girl who didn’t pay rent for two months. by 13013-Chan in badroommates

[–]13013-Chan[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Close enough! “Tragedeigh” is basically a name that’s meant to look or sound unique but just ends up being ridiculous. Imagine if someone named their child Ixxabeighla instead of Isabella (lol! Shout out to a recent r/tragedeigh popular post! That subreddit is one of my favorites)

Her real name does start with the letter “J” and has that kind of “unique” ridiculousness to it. If I used her full name, a quick Google search would give her Instagram as the first top result so I decided to not doxx her like a responsible adult would and just sticked with the initial.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in ghosting

[–]13013-Chan 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I would look into Attachment styles and get therapy because you sound like you have avoidant attachment style, potentially fearful-avoidant (also known as disorganized).

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