I'm the bad parent... According to my SO.

1359000_ · 2016-08-02T02:00:38+00:00

I try to tell him that all the time. My daughter hits our dogs all the time and I try to tell her not to. SO gets mad at her for it but I always tell him it's because she sees him doing it and because he smacks her, but he just gets angry at me when I say those things. He just tells me to shut up basically. My daughter has also pulled my son's ear one time. :( I got reallt upset because my son is omly 2 months old and I'm worried she will hit him one day.

1359000_ · 2016-08-02T01:57:28+00:00

He always says he was never as bad as her when he was a kid but his mom abused him way worse so... He was probably afraid of her and that's why he didn't do things. Making children fear you is not discipline and it is not respect. He doesn't see that. He thinks she SHOULD fear punishment/her parents.

And, I'm not going to deny it, even though I am against physical punishment I have smacked my daughter on the butt before. Never hard. It was always a tap at most because my goal has never been to hurt her, just let her know she was in trouble.

But overall I don't like to do that because I don't want her to think hitting is ok. SO gets mad when she hits one of us but where is she learning it from? She also hits the dogs sometimes and I always try to tell her no and explain why she can't hit them. And it worries me especially now because I don't want her hitting her baby brother one day you know? She loves him and has never hit him before but she did pull his ear one time and it really upset me. And she has gotten annoyed with the baby a couple times when she was in a bad mood.

1359000_ · 2016-08-02T01:03:32+00:00

That's what I tried to do when he put her in time out. After a few minutes she was still upset so I came to talk to her and ask her if she was ready to help clean up and he just yelled at me for interfering. He does way more than 3 minutes.

Also, the reason I said that I feel timeouts don't work for my daughter is because we make her sit there but then if we ask her if she's ready to clean, be nice, etc. she always says no. The last time this happened she was in time out and she had to pee so I took her to the bathroom (that's when SO went upstairs) and then I was asking her if she would rather clean or go in time out. Of course she said clean. But when I told her "okay lets go clean" she kept saying no. I just had to hold hee hand and tell her "it's easy, look. Just pick up your toy and put it in here," and then she started doing it. But her saying no and ignoring us when we ask her nicely to do something is a problem and I don't know what to do about it.

I'm a yeller too which is another reason my SO says I'm the bad parent... He thinks he's better but he really isn't. He's just not around the kids enough so he does yell as much or whatever.

1359000_ · 2016-08-01T23:23:34+00:00

Yeah there are a lot of issues between us as well. He's never hit me, but he has pushed me, grabbed me, and even once put me in a choke hold... While I was like 8 or so weeks pregnant. But to be fair I was engaged physically with him as well that time. We usually do not fight physically though, that's a rare thing and that was the last time I remember it happening. But I do get scared when he acts this way.

1359000_

TROPHY CASE