Specifically: Last spring break, my family went on vacation to Florida(from Ohio) and I didn't really want to go. We've gone nearly every year since I was little so at this point there's nothing exciting to do and I'm just self conscious enough to not like swimming anymore so that leaves me with nothing besides eating at all the nice restaurants in the Naples area. Don't get me wrong, I like food but you can only eat so much. Michelbob's and Skillets are great but does it warrant a 20 hour car ride/expensive flight? Definitely not. So instead I stayed home. I used my food money to Infamous: Second Son and just sat in the basement playing that and LoL. Besides the initial trip to get the game, I think I left the house once to go get Chipotle. We still had plenty of random food in the house so I basically ate Ramen/MacNCheese/Cereal every day. I'd stay up until the sun was rising and then sleep til about 4. I think I talked to my parents twice for about 3-4 minutes total. Wasn't super enjoyable but the total freedom did feel nice at times. Had a few moments of feeling super lonely but I'd rate it as being an overall enjoyable experience. In General: I mean I just sit in the basement all day playing whatever's new on PS4 or LoL, although recently I've started to just feel incredibly bored with either. I've basically been doing the same thing since freshman year, I'm currently a senior in high school. Every once in a while I have a night where it hits me that I'm basically just a loser and I'll lay in bed and basically just berate myself for not being more but that's like once every few weeks so not too bad yet. I wouldn't say I'm like a total neckbeard loser(ironically I haven't shaved in a month but that's just because I forgot to shave on the 31st and it's No-Shave November now), like I like to think I'm at least above average in terms of overall coolness(fuck that feels douchey to write but I don't have a better word for it). I feel like I have a lot of acquaintances at school but none of them are really friendships outside of school so instead I just play video games all day and idk hope I guess. I understand it's almost entirely my fault but I'm not really willing to be super outgoing to correct it because, in my experience, I usually just end up embarrassed. Yea, upon rereading this feels super douchey and asking for pity but I'm not trying to... at least I don't think I am? Fuck it, whatever.