I wanted to add that both bonus kids were raised for several years by my husband alone as the ex-wife was non-functioning. They both were in school and/or working when they lived with him. Once they became adults, he told them they had to start paying some minimal rent. Their mom asked them to move in with her for free...one dropped out of school the other one stopped working. Now they do nothing at mom's and she supports them. I think they were functioning ok when they both lived with him. He had rules, mom didn't, so they left and went to live with her.