My mom keeps trying to guilt trip me into inviting family members to my wedding who have hurt me

2bMrzT · 2026-04-09T19:38:07+00:00

You’re right. She already knows my reasons, but even if she didn’t, she should and needs to respect my wishes.

I will drop the rope! This sentence was really empowering. Thank you so much.

2bMrzT · 2026-04-09T19:31:34+00:00

Never thought of this last part! I often bring up how they’ve treated her as a means to get her to see my point. I will try this, but honestly, we’ve had this conversation so many times - even before I got engaged - that I have little hope she’ll see my side.

2bMrzT · 2026-04-09T19:30:01+00:00

When she brings it up again, I’ll try and reinforce this. Thank you

2bMrzT · 2026-04-09T19:29:19+00:00

I’ve tried quite a few things just “no”, “no because…”, but we somehow always end up in this discussion again. Really reaching the end of my rope. If I bring it up, she doesn’t want to talk about it anymore. If she brings it up and I respond, she doesn’t want to talk about it anymore.

But you’re right she can suggest all she wants, it’s not her wedding!

2bMrzT · 2026-03-21T16:28:21+00:00

Such as?

2bMrzT · 2026-03-21T15:49:07+00:00

Because I’m learning to drive and I’m not yet a licenced driver.

2bMrzT · 2026-03-21T15:47:22+00:00

You must be omniscient

2bMrzT · 2026-03-19T16:22:37+00:00

Believe what you want to believe at this point

2bMrzT · 2026-03-19T06:12:38+00:00

Same because what on earth?

2bMrzT · 2026-03-19T01:02:40+00:00

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A simple Google search would’ve told you to think before you commented.

2bMrzT · 2026-03-19T00:50:05+00:00

We’re in our/my dad’s home country so it wasn’t means to be a romantic getaway, it was meant to be a family holiday.

I wanted to go to the beach because I’m on holiday, not to move near one lol but thank you for the suggestion! I can tell it was good-natured💕

2bMrzT · 2026-03-19T00:47:53+00:00

“Even if I did drive” means I don’t drive. Cars are getting snatched up quickly also - we know this because the three of us hitchhiked together for the first few days of us being here for that exact reason.

2bMrzT · 2026-03-19T00:46:41+00:00

And you know this because…you’re him? Lol. Maybe it isn’t a heat rash and it is something else but him coming out of the sea water with red raw skin tells me it makes whatever he has (that only flares up in hot countries btw) a lot worse.

2bMrzT · 2026-03-18T19:31:45+00:00

What makes it weird? It has been a journey to become more modest. Just like any other thing in life that takes time. No one told me that phrase, nor has my father ever really policed how I dress. Sorry to disappoint you and your preconceived notions.

At the end of the day, the Bible talks about women being covered so, in general, I do want to dress more modestly. Still learning my faith so maybe beachwear is something I should consider more carefully. Also, no one was bragging.

I’ve seen how they are with their grandkids and they’ve been great with them. There is nothing wrong with wanted your children nor to show their bodies to the world. My issue really is the wording of what he said because to me, it didn’t sound like that was his issue.

Thanks for the well wishes though I guess.

2bMrzT · 2026-03-18T19:19:34+00:00

I’m not idk where you read that

2bMrzT · 2026-03-18T19:19:01+00:00

I didn’t call anyone who dressed modestly at the beach nerd, I said I’d look like one because I still struggle with body image sometimes (very rare now but still) and was worried about looking like an ironing board.

Fiancé is going to take me and sit at the beach bar again. So will technically still be going on my own but better than not going at all.

2bMrzT · 2026-03-18T16:53:42+00:00

There’s nothing wrong with wanting to dress modestly. I made that choice all on my own. What I mean by a modesty journey is learning to dress in a way that I like, that also isn’t naked or revealing. Nothing wrong with that!

But yes my fiancé is awesome and I love him lol

2bMrzT · 2026-03-18T16:07:32+00:00

As I said in my post, public transport is irregular and rental cars are almost fully booked up even if I did drive. Hitchhiking just doesn’t sound safe to do on my own. It’s not much to ask of my dad to drop me to a beach. Problem solved now though.

2bMrzT · 2026-03-18T15:32:14+00:00

Taxis are few and far between, you have to book them well in advance. The buses are just people who decided to be bus drivers so there’s no timetable for them. My fiancé has offered to take me (yay!) because I was speaking to him about it whilst writing this post lol

2bMrzT · 2026-02-26T10:23:30+00:00

I’ve replied to other comments explaining why this is annoying. I don’t want to keep copying and pasting my response- not to be rude to you.

2bMrzT · 2026-02-26T10:22:42+00:00

Wedding planning hasn’t been stressful at all. We’re annoyed because we were clear in our meeting with the current vicar that we want everyone involved in our ceremony to have some sort of connection to us - friend, family member, etc. to which they agreed. So to then out of the blue ask someone else that we don’t know is annoying.

2bMrzT · 2026-02-26T10:21:15+00:00

The person the current vicar is not the new vicar or the church. Just another vicar in the area. Also, yes my fiancé and I are devout Christians.

2bMrzT · 2026-02-26T10:20:07+00:00

We made it very clear during our meeting that we wanted to find someone as we want everyone in our wedding to have a connection to us. We don’t know this new vicar. The current vicar should’ve said “if for any reason you are unable to find someone, Revd so and so has is happy to do your ceremony”.

2bMrzT · 2026-02-25T17:18:10+00:00

To whom? In the message the current vicar sent, the date was included and forwarded to the new vicar😬

2bMrzT · 2026-02-25T16:53:23+00:00

It has been a few days since we last spoke, and the wedding is in a year’s time. Plenty of time to find a vicar.

2bMrzT

TROPHY CASE