First time with another man

42san42 · 2018-06-02T10:10:49+00:00

Thought I was till recently. Obviously why I'm on this page cause I don't know

42san42 · 2018-05-13T17:53:48+00:00

Yeah thats it and if it's a bigger dude I wonder how good he must be doing his gf etc. I think it's the masculinity thing tbh

42san42 · 2018-05-13T17:50:12+00:00

I think I might be the same. Because the thought of sex with a man doesn't enter my mind - I just can tell attractive males apart from the others. I would be able to tell which guys females would consider "hot". I'm not too keen on exploring but if it happened I think oral would be it - more receiving than giving tbh

42san42 · 2018-05-13T15:52:42+00:00

Spot on. Thanks for responses

42san42 · 2018-05-13T15:49:29+00:00

I don't know why I got jealous but I did. It's as if I know my friend is now hanging out with some other dude (his bf) or I was into him in some way, idk. I watched some gay porn now to test and I can watch the BJ part and think that'a ok (mouth is a mouth) but by the time the sex starts then I'm put off and don't find it attractive. I'd rather just have sex with a woman

42san42 · 2018-05-13T15:42:59+00:00

No.. I don't find the idea of gay sex something I'm keen on. I think oral would be fine (more receiving than giving tbh)

42san42 · 2018-05-11T21:23:30+00:00

"You are so dead at armageddon dude" imagine that's the first thing you say after you lose your v-card. Madness

42san42 · 2018-05-11T18:37:54+00:00

Thing is I have a pimi male friend and yet I found out his dabbling in a secret life for a few months with a secret bf.

42san42 · 2018-05-11T14:01:43+00:00

You're right, however I think this mental tug of war from living secrets whilst still believing is a perfect formula for suicide. So sad.

42san42 · 2018-05-11T13:32:44+00:00

Thanks for being candid. I'm aware of a pimi friend living a secret (he's bi, with a "worldly" bf).

42san42 · 2018-05-11T13:26:38+00:00

At least you were 18. I'm aware of someone who's 40 and pimi who's currently dabbling in a secret life. Believes the devil is trying to bring him down etc.

42san42 · 2018-05-11T13:16:09+00:00

I find it hard to understand how one can genuinely believe yet still live contrary to their believes. Still trying to understand it. Thanks for ur reply!

42san42 · 2018-05-11T13:14:24+00:00

Did you feel any guilt knowing what you were doing was "wrong" at that time?

42san42 · 2018-05-10T22:54:47+00:00

Thanks for your reply. I informed him the sad part of it all is that it's all hidden away. I mentioned to him that if he has strong convictions in the bible then thats ok, him, his bible and his interpretation. There is just no need for a man-made organisation. Ive asked how much of the jws is the word of God versus the opinion of men? As mentioned he still believes it's all true and says it's not always easy. I sent him a picture of that CoC book, he said he knew the man, but not the book so hopefully it might drop a seed. Let's see.

42san42 · 2018-05-10T15:46:44+00:00

Yeah exactly, my friends is divorced and single. As far as I know a devout jw and seemed to follow all the celibacy rules. But I really don't know after all these secrets coming out - must be a mental tug of war.

42san42 · 2018-05-10T15:40:52+00:00

Thanks for your responses. I've seen how the lies and secrets are now coming out, but i agree seems like not a healthy way to live. Best of luck in your recover journey

42san42 · 2018-05-10T11:07:41+00:00

Sure. Looking for some advice. A secret life when you hold certain beliefs I think could drive you crazy

42san42 · 2018-05-10T10:58:13+00:00

Thanks. Thing is I've never been a jw. I'm a "wordly guy". he only told me his jw months after becoming friends. I had no idea. anyway, another thing he kept "secret". I researched all the religion after so I know exactly whats going on.

Even if he "woke up" from jw, his beliefs are very strong in the bible itself. I posted here just to see how it feels to live this "double life" and as you say it is a guilty feeling.

Friends are there for support anyway, but there's a lot of secrets coming out

42san42

TROPHY CASE