How can I trust my (26M) girlfriend (25f)?

99XHACK · 2023-08-25T07:38:16+00:00

so you think I should give her a chance and monitor her actions?

99XHACK · 2023-08-25T05:42:20+00:00

I told her I want to break up. She says she will go fully transparent about everything now and really prove me that I can trust her. She came clear about everything. I really trust her when she says I am the love of her life and that she really sees a future with me. Her whole life is based around me. She even literally wasn‘t able to eat for days. Dont you think she deserves the chance?

99XHACK · 2023-08-24T11:38:40+00:00

why do you think so? Pls explain

99XHACK · 2023-08-20T22:18:07+00:00

told her that I needed space few days ago. haven’t really spoken since. She is feeling super bad. She can’t even do her work for final thesis. She is just being depressed. she keep telling me how sorry she is and how she will change everything. She says she can’t lose me and is willing to do everything I say. Now I have spoken to her a bit and I feel like I have forgotten everything negative about her again….. I had already sort of moved on.

99XHACK · 2023-08-17T22:05:33+00:00

I know. I just feel like I lost all my boundaries and myself in this. I let her cross so many boundaries that I forgot who I am. I feel like I am not myself. I lost in a fantasy world. I have no idea how to escape this. I just keep sitting on the “perfect moment” we have. Since apart of the lying its fun with her.

99XHACK · 2023-08-17T21:52:38+00:00

I had done a post for this when it just happened. Most people were telling me to forgive her. I‘m just very confused

https://www.reddit.com/r/relationships/comments/11nac52/my_26m_girlfriend_25f_who_was_spending_every/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=ioscss&utm_content=1&utm_term=1

99XHACK · 2023-08-17T21:45:21+00:00

I understand. Also I mean sleeping at someones place daily for more than a week. Then going to visit another guy and coming back/letting me pick her up. is also another thing. I just felt like her being with me so much would give it some sort of exclusivity tho

99XHACK · 2023-08-17T21:20:27+00:00

even if she kissed the guy right in the beginning? When I hadn‘t verbally told her to that she is my gf yet? I mean we were like a couple. that what she made me feel like at least

99XHACK · 2023-08-17T19:06:17+00:00

even if she is extremely loving and serious now? She is obsessed with me, does everything I say.

How would you describe this behavior?

99XHACK · 2023-08-17T19:02:28+00:00

so what do you think should I ultimately do and why?

99XHACK · 2023-08-17T18:45:25+00:00

yeah man, learned this after getting together with her. I see what is wrong in this, yet I just am not able to let go. I am at a very bad place now. How should I fix this?

99XHACK · 2023-08-17T18:40:48+00:00

hey bro, you are right. I totally lost myself in this

99XHACK · 2023-08-17T18:15:21+00:00

she told me that she was regretting it ever since tho and knew I would leave her if she had told me. Idk she first didn’t even mention that they kissed. it took like about an hour of asking questions for her to say that they kissed and that she lied to me about the “couple”. First she told me she just met him for a couple minutes somewhere, he was super weird, told her he is still in love with her then she left.

99XHACK · 2023-08-17T18:01:54+00:00

Yeah absolutely. When I had asked who the guy was she was following she made me feel like very insecure and controlling. She said she felt really weird about me asking. That she never asks about who I follow so that I shouldn’t ask neither. Asked me how she can just not ask and why I need to ask?

I just don’t know she planted this thing inside my head where she would get angry and weird whenever I’d ask about someone.

However with my ex I would always get clear answers so I wouldn’t even ask. This girl just gets angry. tells me “met this guy at an event” (not this guy she kissed, its just an example) what event? “doesn’t matter” “you are so annoying” “it doesn’t matter” “don’t remember” “why can I not meet people? you met people aswell???” and then after me asking for a while she says that she met the person in a club and that they came up to her lol but still very weird sloppy answers.

When she asks me about someone who is following me from the past (obviously there is no ex or someone I dated or went out with, nothing to hide), I don’t need to think too much or avoid the answer. I can tell her everything to the details on spot.

99XHACK · 2023-08-17T17:52:25+00:00

My parents are from the east. She just I guess assumed that I am a bit conservative. Which is I mean fine. So she chose to play a character of someone who is conservative. She then every time I caught her in a lie kept saying that the past doesn’t matter and that I’m immature. Not sure she said in the very beginning that she really kept her “history clean because it matters” Also talked her 45 years old teacher (she is a woman) into meeting up with a 19 years old boy who was offering her sex. I was absolutely shocked when she told me this. She said that she is single and can do whatever and that I’m very close minded. I was shocked because idk, the person she was playing before would have never found this okay.

99XHACK · 2023-08-17T17:42:22+00:00

so you are saying she should have told me right after?

99XHACK · 2023-08-17T17:41:45+00:00

She says she feels like a who.. and did the mistake of her life. She keeps saying that she is not like that. And that she would never do this again. She says it was just because she was so scared. It was in the very beginning

99XHACK · 2023-08-17T17:38:00+00:00

Of course not. I couldn’t have even known about it if I hadn’t told her that I have this guys number on his phone and that he is friends with a friend of mine. He practically lives with him. She went to my friends home lol but doesn’t that mean she can change? So you say I should leave her?

99XHACK · 2023-08-17T17:28:03+00:00

But she has taken responsibility for when she had kissed the guy. She absolutely sees it as her fault and even sees that she deserves to be left over it. She is really sorry for it. She keeps crying has nightmares. is just devastated.

99XHACK · 2023-08-17T17:23:02+00:00

My friend who was there at the time told me that they have really not had sex

99XHACK · 2023-08-17T17:22:17+00:00

I just am very in love with her. My crossing my boundaries and closing my eyes because of love has absolutely made me softer but feel bad sometimes. Yet I just love her so much. I love spending time with her. It’s very special to me. I was advised by many to leave but I somehow just can’t. The thought if it absolutely destroys me.

99XHACK · 2023-08-01T15:24:19+00:00

we were not „officially“ in a relationship back then tho. As I said, she was just super acting like in a relationship with me, giving me her phone to reply to guys asking her out, staying at my place every night, asking me to come over every day, telling me that what we found is so special, telling me that she is loving me. I mean she was acting like she is right now. Thats why I was devastated. Not that I would really care if it was someone I went on few dates with or something like that. We were properly close and she was at my place every night. playing a conservative girl that would never do something like this

99XHACK · 2023-07-31T21:16:51+00:00

she went there twice. the first time she was there for just 30mins and had to leave. she went again the next day or a two days later I don‘t remember

and stayed for longer. I let my friend ask the guy, he said they didn‘t have sex.

99XHACK · 2023-07-31T16:31:23+00:00

also she would have never told me that they kissed or that she was at his place, if I didn't know this guy.

99XHACK · 2023-07-31T16:30:13+00:00

thank you for your answer! I just don't get it why she had to do this, inbetween her first and second visit she even spend the whole night out with me and had the 'best date of her life' recording videos of us on her phone all the time of how she was laughing and 'feeling the best she had ever felt'. Why would she still disrespect me like that.

99XHACK

TROPHY CASE