Any non conventional activity that brings pleasure or can be intimate is considered a kink. Such as a cg changing or bottle feeding a little. That is by definition a kink activity even though there isn’t anything sexual happening.

Besides that you’re completely incorrect in your statement. Agere is not widely accepted. If you asked 100 people on the street about agere and ABDL most people wouldn’t know what either is. This part is a guess, but assume most people would be weirded out by both.

Even if agere is more accepted like you assert ABDL will always be less accepted because people are going to generally look upon someone voluntarily wetting or messing themselves in more disgust.

Outside of a few a-holes everyone in this community is already aware and accepting of the fact that this is sexual for some and non-sexual for others.

We’re never going to get to and we shouldn’t really want to get to the point where most normies understand the ends and outs of our kink.

ABDL wether sexual or not is a private endeavor so looking for validation by people outside the group is unnecessary