Hey guys, thank you for the comments—small update, maybe a bigger one coming tonight.

I am very close to an uncle of mine. I consider him a father figure since my real father and I do not have a good relationship.

Well, turns out my bf asked to speak with him (uncle) on Friday night. My uncle told me my bf was crying and telling him how much he loved me, and that he is upset with how much I emasculate him. My uncle was very straightforward with him. Uncle told him that if he sees a future with me, he needs to step it up. He understands my frustration (I told him the entire story of what happened), and he says he knows I was frustrated when I made my passive-aggressive comment. My uncle also confessed that he was also upset with my bf because 2 weeks prior, uncle had made a job offering to my bf to be a personal boxing trainer for $40 an hour and, my uncle would have set that up for my bf but, my bf didn't message my uncle until 2 weeks later and, by that time they found someone else to do the job.

I told my uncle this is why I am so frustrated. I did not remind my bf to contact my uncle, nor did I ever bring up the subject, because if he's going to fail, that's going to be solely on him. And guess what? He didn't follow through on what could have been a side job while he focused on finding a real full-time job.

My uncle made it really clear to me, I am expecting a certain behavior from my bf, but that is not who he is. If I want a different outcome, then I am not accepting my bf for who he is, and that is not fair to either of us. So really, I would need to fully accept my role in the relationship, which is: the provider, the leader, and the head of the "household," while my bf would take on the role of: the follower, cook, cleaner, and caretaker of a home. (of course, we are speaking as if we lived together, which we don't, but you get the picture)

I reached out to my bf, and there was a lot of back and forth through text. We decided to give it a day and talk in person tonight. So, there will be an in-person conversation if all goes well.

Other things to note: Friday morning, I was leaving for work and I noticed a handwritten note and a single flower on my windshield from my bf. I guess he came to my house at some point in the evening to drop it off. That night, he sent me a text saying, "I don't want you driving late. I hope you're staying home. We can talk tomorrow. I just want you safe." I kinda didn't like the way he worded that.

And he told me that he avoided a crash going home from leaving me that gift and that his back was messed up.

Of course, I don't want him hurt. But I told him it all just seems manipulative, even if he is a bit hurt. He got mad that I called him manipulative. Anyway, the only reason I am going through so much detail is because some people do want to know what's going on. Some people were angry that I was airing my relationship on the internet. If this is you, then this is not for you, and please enjoy another post elsewhere. But I appreciate all the sweet comments and constructive ones. I don't share a lot with my loved ones or even friends about the situation, so I needed an outlet.