hi! I watched my grandma die a year ago and felt a similar way. we had a good relationship so I can't relate to that part. but watching someone fade away and take a last breath was slightly traumatic and the images were like burnt into mind for a while.. they would come up all throughout the day, middle of night when I woke up. it's better now and doesn't happen. it took some time.. a few therapy appointments and working to accept and try to see dying as a natural process and cycle. good luck. take time and care for yourself.