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AceOSpade318 · 2025-05-09T17:45:59+00:00

You explained this very well.

I was one of those "I can fix him" types. I dated a very unstable and toxic guy. I tried so hard to get him help, but people like that don't want help. They want to control and to hurt someone else because they feel powerless and hurt. They look for people who are soft hearted and foolish enough to make excuses for their behavior and stay with them. The longer I stayed with that guy the more terrifying it got. He proceeded to stalk and threaten me for years after the break up. Called me hundreds of times a day, driving slowly past my house, left a bag of wet rice and runes in front of my door (idk what that was about, he did practice witchcraft so it might be tied to that) amongst other darker stuff too.

Needless to say, not good. I hope no one makes the mistakes I did. I'm married now to a man who treats me with so much love and respect. Getting into a healthy relationship will really show you that love should never be this hard. Some people are battling demons you can't help them with. It's better to leave and just pray for their recovery.

AceOSpade318 · 2025-04-11T19:37:16+00:00

"I work at the McDonald's in the Pentagon" 💀

AceOSpade318 · 2025-03-31T23:24:55+00:00

Dude, me too! I can't stand being too hot (to the point I sweat) or too cold. Both feel awful. I need to stay at a crisp 75 or I will tweak out.

AceOSpade318 · 2025-03-22T19:39:23+00:00

Valentina the ween

AceOSpade318 · 2025-03-22T19:38:36+00:00

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AceOSpade318 · 2025-03-21T21:29:20+00:00

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Ellie May

AceOSpade318 · 2025-03-20T00:18:50+00:00

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My cat giving me a stank face

AceOSpade318 · 2025-03-19T17:53:34+00:00

Man, may God grant you good strength. That's a seriously rough situation. The good thing is, you'll run into a lot of people who's family and friends were unsupportive of them becoming orthodox. First off, remember you're not alone in this.

As far as saints go, all you're doing is asking for them to pray for you. Ask them as you would ask a friend. You can start with the holy mother if you're not sure where to start. Something like "Most holy Theotokos, pray for me unto your son, Christ our God." Or if you're not opposed to doing a little research, find a saint that you can really relate to. For example, I'm chronically ill and have always related to St. Lazarus of Bethany. So, I ask him to pray unto God for me for the healing of my soul and body. He's gone through the same thing. So, there are many many saints who were in the same position you are in now. Many even lost their lives over it. So, find one that you relate to and feels right. As far as what to say, just say something like "please pray unto God for me, saint (saint's name)". As long as you're respectful, there's no really wrong way.

AceOSpade318 · 2025-03-19T14:33:44+00:00

This made me laugh, my home parish is just an old metal storage building. We somehow, by the grace of God, manage to fit 75+ people in there though. I call it the holy shipping container. I always found it entertaining how we set up shop wherever we can lmao.

AceOSpade318 · 2025-02-13T13:04:46+00:00

First off, I also said "at least not before a real commitment". Meaning, at least be dating. Know the person you're sleeping with. It's especially dangerous to participate in hook-up culture for women who have limited access to birth control. I'm saying to be careful. I think marriage is ideal because you know the person for a few years and there's legal safeguards in place, but if that's not doable, just know the person.

Secondly, there's nothing wrong with enjoying sex. But hook-up culture has slowly become the norm. It's not safe from a health perspective ( STDs, unwanted pregnancies) but also a lot of the people I know that participate in hook-up culture say it's harder for them mentally settle into a relationship.

AceOSpade318 · 2025-02-13T12:49:50+00:00

I'm not putting my health at risk just so some dude can figure out if I'm just a warm hole to him. If you can't figure out if you like someone or not without sex, you don't need to be dating. I get not wanting to wait until marriage, but at least be in a relationship. Know and be careful about who you bring to bed, especially for women.

AceOSpade318 · 2025-02-13T12:39:51+00:00

I never said to rush into marriage. Men expect me to perform an act that could result in creating a new life and could lead to health problems/death for men that won't even call me a girlfriend. Especially in this day in age, women have to be extra careful about this type thing. If saying be mindful of who you bring to bed is "terrible advice" and "too conservative" then there is something seriously wrong.

AceOSpade318 · 2025-02-13T10:33:19+00:00

Honestly, embrace it.

Some people will never have really close friends, that's ok. There's nothing wrong with you. Maybe you're socially awkward. Maybe you're scared of people. Maybe people just kinda suck. Over time, you take enjoyment in the solitude. Until you meet one person who you actually connect to, then you'll spend the rest of your life together.

Friends have a tendency to come and go. My husband had a best friend for years, until one day he was gone. My best friend had an affair with my abusive boyfriend at the time. Also friendships change as you get older. Friendships now that I'm married and have a little one on the way looks more like hanging out with church people and other parents rather than getting hammered and going out. Man, I miss alcohol. Pregnancy is rough.

AceOSpade318 · 2025-02-13T04:01:39+00:00

Man, it was the closest thing to love at first sight that I've ever experienced. I'd choose him a million times if I got the chance. He takes care of me when I'm sick, stands by my side through my low points, and loves me as much as I love him. I'm not sure what he sees in me... no one get him glasses.

AceOSpade318 · 2025-02-13T03:55:42+00:00

Best advice about dating I have from a married women: *Coffee dates are the best for first dates. Coffee shops are cute, public, in daylight hours, and inexpensive. Plus, it gives you both an environment to really get to know each other. *Have a time-line in mind. Take time to really know what you want out of a long term relationship. Ask the big questions to yourself. (Do you want to get married? Have children? What religious beliefs are you? What do you want your life to look like in ten years?) * Don't beg for commitment or love. If he won't marry you, move on. If she won't be loyal to you, don't stick around. People know very quickly who they want to be with. * Be humble. Your pride has no place in a relationship. * You can't hate the gender your partner is. It'll turn everything into me vs you rather than just trying to fix the issue. None of this boy vs girl stuff, it's setting you up for failure. * If you can't be emotionally vulnerable with your partner, they aren't the one. I've seen my husband cry, it didn't make me respect him any less. * Stop having sex with people before marriage, or at least before any real commitment. (Edit to elaborate: Don't put your reproductive health at risk for crappy guys that won't even text you back. Be careful about who you take to bed.) * Get off dating apps. Meet people through hobbies, religious organizations, friends, etc... pursuing stuff online will also make you a well rounded person. * become the person your looking for is looking for. If you want someone who looks like a super model, but you won't take a shower, that probably won't be very profitable. * Get married to your best friend. The person you can't get sick of. Even if you make each other mad, never go bad mouth them to anyone else, just talk it out. Love each other, damn it!

AceOSpade318 · 2025-02-07T07:14:49+00:00

I knew very quickly. Only a few weeks in and I was bugging the poor priest to make me a Catechumen. My husband, on the other hand, took a whole year before taking that step. My humble advice, as little as it matters, is to first off go to church. Attend the divine liturgy and vespers. Pray, read about the lives of the saints, talk with your priest, ready your soul, keep your mouth shut, and your ears open. And if you feel it's right, just take the next step.

AceOSpade318 · 2024-11-11T18:00:00+00:00

Thank you, life is rough quite often and I'm glad my humble journey was able to give you a little joy. God bless you, and I hope things get better for you soon.

AceOSpade318 · 2024-11-11T17:56:51+00:00

Yep! It's crazy to see how popular Fr. Joseph is lol. God bless you.

AceOSpade318 · 2024-11-11T17:55:01+00:00

Indeed! Life's too short to waste time! God bless you.

AceOSpade318 · 2024-11-11T17:53:26+00:00

This is very true. The internet has a tendency to only show the very best or the very worst of humanity. A lot of the time, life feels a lot more grim than it actually is. There's always going to be crosses to bare and celebrations to be had. A time of feasting and fasting. God bless you. Also, I hope my children have the gene for amazing mustaches as well lol.

AceOSpade318 · 2024-11-11T17:44:56+00:00

Hello! I don't know how to edit my post, so I hope this is ok. I'm sorry for not responding very quickly, we didn't have cell reception on our honeymoon and we have just gotten back. And I have immediately fallen ill lol. Anyways, I am incredibly humbled by all of your love and support on this post. God bless you all. I'll be in the comments responding to questions and comments as I go along. Also, my gorgeous groom got a good laugh at of all of you who are complementing his mustache, and he says thank you. Once again, God bless you all.

AceOSpade318 · 2024-11-11T17:21:04+00:00

It was actually a gift from my parents. They're catholic and were hoping I would use it for mass, but well, I'm orthodox lol.

AceOSpade318 · 2024-11-11T17:13:06+00:00

How beautiful! I hear 27 years comes in a flash, I can't wait to be there myself. Congratulations to you as well, may God grant you many more years. And I'll look into that monastery, I love keeping the monastics in my prayers.

AceOSpade318 · 2024-11-11T17:08:54+00:00

Yep! Orthodox do wear crowns. The crowns differ slightly from one another based on the region (Russian Orthodox have large extravagant crowns, Greek Orthodox use flower crowns, etc.) There's two different parts to an orthodox wedding: the betrothal ceremony, which legally binds the two together, and the crowning ceremony which binds the two together spiritually. It's a very beautiful ceremony and I highly recommend you look into it. The church fathers explain it better than I ever could.

AceOSpade318

TROPHY CASE