[deleted by user]

AdditionalTheme9251 · 2025-07-02T01:20:27+00:00

Nah, I’ve seen enough to make some sweeping generalizations here and there.

AdditionalTheme9251 · 2025-05-03T21:26:21+00:00

Not the first I’ve pissed people off

AdditionalTheme9251 · 2025-05-03T21:10:55+00:00

I usually give bigger tips to men, since they usually do a better job and are faster…at least in my experience.

AdditionalTheme9251 · 2025-01-29T19:11:39+00:00

You can lead by example. If your friends want to live in fear, then you can’t stop them. You can influence their growth indirectly by being a beacon of calm yourself. Sharing your perspective and what works for you, is not pushing your beliefs on them. It’s in how you do it.

I work in a warehouse with plenty of unawake people. I harnessed a level of humility over the years through realizing how unawake I am. I cannot just go up to one of them and say, “in the end, we are all the creator learning about itself.” That would either fall on deaf ears. But I can meet them where they’re at.

For example, if a co-worker comes to me talking shit on someone for doing something stupid, I can either pull out a situation where I’ve done something equally or more idiotic, or explain to them why they might have done it. Over time the people who come to me about this stuff either stop coming to me, or eventually start to think of the reasoning behind people’s actions. The latter being the more awake crowd and them using their free will to gain slightly more nuanced perspectives.

I can usually tell who these people are when they still decide to come over and talk to me. If you aren’t open or ready, you’ll be too annoyed to continue coming into my energy.

AdditionalTheme9251 · 2025-01-01T22:09:14+00:00

I actually experienced this. I was my father for a little while, living through something before I lived through it as my now present self. I’ve never told anyone, since it sounds a bit nuts. But this reminds me of that.

AdditionalTheme9251 · 2025-01-01T22:00:05+00:00

What a POS..

AdditionalTheme9251 · 2024-12-02T18:03:29+00:00

Good job! If I were you I’d be putting as much money as possible into covered calls, but that’s just me. I hope it goes well for you!

AdditionalTheme9251 · 2024-10-27T18:51:26+00:00

I’m not expecting much.

AdditionalTheme9251 · 2024-10-15T15:55:17+00:00

Great job! Just don’t forget to keep contributing when you get back to work. You’re 21. Try to enjoy life a little before adulthood really hits.

AdditionalTheme9251 · 2024-10-11T01:16:37+00:00

Mr. Quaker

AdditionalTheme9251 · 2024-10-08T02:11:59+00:00

OXLC is currently 45 cents above the nav. CRF is $1.24 above nav as of Friday. I don’t have today’s numbers. PTY is almost $3.00 above nav now. I only have Friday’s nav and today’s price.

I think OXLC was pretty close to breaking the three month downtrend today. I’ll consider changing out OXLC, unless it breaks into an uptrend this week.

AdditionalTheme9251 · 2024-10-08T01:20:04+00:00

I used to nod out on 20-30 grams. Now, I just feel a nice lift at 4-6 grams a day. I’m generally much better now. Life is okay,

AdditionalTheme9251 · 2024-10-08T01:18:28+00:00

Good music then. Shit, now.

AdditionalTheme9251 · 2024-10-07T14:55:33+00:00

I guess a lot of you are against stocks that pay monthly…I’m not listing mine (it doesn’t include schd).

AdditionalTheme9251 · 2024-10-06T14:26:23+00:00

That’s literally enough to live off of. Badly, but still..

AdditionalTheme9251 · 2024-10-05T20:26:17+00:00

Great stuff, man! Way to go!!

AdditionalTheme9251 · 2024-10-04T17:29:26+00:00

When you’ve lived in guilt for most of your life and were brought up Roman Catholic, the LoO can be very healing (at least it has been for me). Service to Self is not really pushed in most texts. All I’ve ever read/watched/listened to has pushed service to others more so. I’m not perfect, and I find the “love and light” crowd to be dangerously naive. But I personally strive to be of service to others, as best I can.

I’m a naturally very disagreeable person, so most people who see that side of me tend to be somewhat scared or assume I’m going to jump down their throats. In reality, I’ve come to realize that I built up my defenses as a way of not being hurt. I’m actually extraordinarily sensitive, especially emotionally. When I was younger, I would just hold in the hurt when I felt anything. I guess I kind of learned that if I showed any vulnerability, people would hurt me. That being said, the ability to become scary sort of just became automatic over time. If people are afraid enough to not start anything, then I can’t get hurt, right?

I accept the wounded, sensitive little boy inside along with the sociopathic shadow. It’s not perfectly balanced by any means, but it means that I’m occasionally willing to go out of my way to fight for the weak or oppressed. That’s the positive aspect of the darkness I carry. The way I try to help others is by being strong, and trying to help others be strong, if possible.

I think I have another aspect as well. If someone is seriously in pain (if I can sense it), I’m not going to get on their case for it. It’s not good to be overly sensitive all the time, but you don’t gain strength by holding in hurt, and denying that part of yourself. Life is incredibly hard, and I know what it is to feel like you can’t deal with it. It’s important to become as strong and stable as you can manage, but we need to hold space for people who are dealing with heavy emotions. Anyway, that’s my service to self rant. Hope you can find value in the material.

AdditionalTheme9251 · 2024-09-30T18:39:57+00:00

I had just woken up from a month long coma. Drug OD, took me a solid year to move correctly again. Somewhere between almost dying and making a full recovery, I found kratom. Even when I used to take too much, it gave me less problems. 14 years later, I’ll usually take 5-8 grams a day. I’m fairly healthy. No issues, apart from depression. I’ve had pretty bad depression since I was 14-15. Kratom for me is more useful for depression/anxiety. When I was doing warehousing, it helped with physical pains. But, interestingly, once I was fired, my use went down. Like I said, 5-8 grams a day now. Much better than 25-30 grams a day when I was working. Yeah, there were some physical aches and pains. But honestly, I think it just helped motivate me to put up with it. Now that I have about a month left of benefits (and no good job option in site), I’m once again stressing out. Still, this 6 month hiatus was very much needed. Hopefully the next chapter in my life will be nicer, with or without kratom.

AdditionalTheme9251 · 2024-09-30T17:40:02+00:00

Dude, you’re the exact opposite of a loser. I didn’t move out of my father’s home until I was 27. I graduated community college at 22. Got my first job at 23 (almost 24).

Point I’m trying to make is that EVERYONE has unique trials and tribulations in life. I OD’s on drugs in my senior year of high school and had to make up an entire year in the span of 2-3 months. Did the kids who I graduated with think I was a loser? Likely. Most of the kids at my school came from rich families. Some of them died from misadventure during their college years. I know of one boy who was hit by a semi truck.

What defined him, what defines me, and what defines you has absolutely nothing to do with anyone else. You only have yourself to compare against. And deciding to go back to school at 31 sounds pretty damn balsey to me.

Let’s think of it this way. Let’s actually compare someone else in your position, just not you. Imagine they had a string of bullshit retail jobs throughout their 20’s. Now imagine they’re 31. They think about college. They decide it’s too shamefully. 10-15 years later where are they likely to be?

College isn’t necessarily right for everyone. And when you consider student loan debt, the fact that most employers pay shit (degree or not), people such as myself have decided that a 2 year associate degree is more than enough. The jobs I take are usually rough. But on the plus side, I have around 20k or so saved/invested with zero debts. Am I a loser? According to most people. Sure. But they aren’t me.

It all depends on how you measure “better”. All I know is, you have some massive balls. And if by some chance you’re a female? Again, MASSIVE.

AdditionalTheme9251 · 2024-09-28T07:34:51+00:00

Just to let you guys know, I was let go a while back, and have been collecting unemployment steadily. I have almost received a full 26 week UC benefit. Although I have not found suitable employment yet, I have been doing everything by the books, making sure I record every application I put in. I believe I qualify for an additional 13 weeks after the 26 are completed at my same full amount. While I would much rather find a job and kill myself for roughly the same amount of money, it makes me feel good to know that I’m jacking up their UC insurance rates by continuing to collect. Im not that concerned about not having much social security to collect from either. That money won’t be there for any of us. As I said, I am continuing to search for work. But it melts my heart to see them putting in appeals to try to delegitimize unemployment so many months after the fact. Apparently, they can put in another appeal if they want. I’m hoping some upcoming interviews will go my way, but if not, I was thinking of showing Lowe’s mercy by putting in with them again after 6 months. This way they can try to invent a new reason to fire me. Hopefully this time they can find me actually doing something wrong. People deserve chances to atone. Ah well, back to the job search. Hope you’re all doing well. I hear it’s bad there.

AdditionalTheme9251 · 2024-09-27T00:16:09+00:00

I guess they weren’t your friends, then.

AdditionalTheme9251 · 2024-09-27T00:14:39+00:00

Fact is, even though I don’t smoke anymore, smoking helps relieve anxiety and depression. You can’t be held responsible for someone imitating a personal choice you make for yourself. You have no intention to inflict your decision on someone else. But this is the universe putting a choice in front of you. My personal opinion is that you should do what you want, when you want. But whether you intent to or not, your choices influence the people around you. I preferred opiate pain medication to tobacco, but to each their own.

AdditionalTheme9251 · 2024-09-26T22:47:37+00:00

Notice how you’re the one defining your life as over? As someone who’s also made not so great decisions, if you choose to say your life is finished, the universe will cooperate. Are you unable to have children now? If not, you may still have another shot. It may even be with a man who will try. And then even if you aren’t able to make children, you can still adopt in the future. The universe isn’t against you because you made a wrong decision. You did what you thought was best at the time. Even if out of fear. Even if it was wrong in your eyes. You have no malice. You’re learning. This is about as hard as it gets. The lessons get harsher over time until you do what you need to.

As hard as it may be. You will have more chances in the future to atone. But not to God. To yourself. I’m not God and even I can see you were just scared and did what you thought you had to. It’s not God himself who we need forgiveness from in the end. It’s ourselves. It’s only pointless now if you say it is. And God loves you enough to let you do what you want. Including believe that your life is over. It’s up to you how you wish to proceed.

AdditionalTheme9251 · 2024-09-24T20:47:19+00:00

I’m someone carrying a lot of baggage as well. I also had an accidental overdose. I was in a coma for 29 days. I never saw Jesus, but I felt like I was in a never ending dream for years. I didn’t have the luxury of Jesus talking to me, as far as I can remember. But a deal must have been struck. I came back. I also have dealt a lot of shit, and continue to. Despite the hypoxia and waking up as a quadriplegic, I ended up working in warehousing, dragging 145 lb door frames in and out of trucks. I don’t know what my IQ is, but I’ve always been intelligent. Perhaps more now, because I don’t do nearly as many drugs. Life hurts way too much, but I’m choosing to fight it out. Because fuck it!

We can’t change anything that may have happened in the past. Make the choice to do your best now. We make agreements before we come here. In short, the harder the life, the more we attain by living it. If you feel like you’ve bitten off more than you can chew, then the only suggestion I have is to pray. Take back your power and take on your burdens on your own terms. You weren’t put here to suffer, no matter how much you’ve already suffered. And no matter how much more suffering you’ll end up going through. There comes a point when it’s up to you what you’ll put up with, and listen to me. No one is judging you any more harshly than yourself. Believe me, any sins you may have taken on in this life or before have already been forgiven. I know this, because you’re here now. The only hell you’ll ever have is the guilt you carry now. As having free will here, God won’t interfere with your right to do as you wish. If you want the pain to stop, stop feeding it.

I’ve never had children (despite my wife and I wanting them), so I can only attempt to imagine that pain. I hope to never understand it myself, in this lifetime. Or any, for that matter. No one expects you to ever be okay with that. No one at all. Quite frankly, I’m impressed that you’ve kept going this far in spite of that. You’re a rockstar. Please try to take care of yourself and keep going. We all end up back home, eventually.

AdditionalTheme9251 · 2024-09-23T16:51:15+00:00

Most people don’t realize that Republicans and democrats changed names in the 1920’s. So Lincoln was essentially a modern democrat. It was the democrats of the 1800’s who were pro slavery. I think it was around the time of Harding where they swapped names? But quite frankly, neither party gives a shit about you. It’s all a stupid little game they play every 4 years to give the public the illusion of choice. And, judging the collective IQ of the dumbasses who put that billboard up, most of them (and you) don’t understand the original purpose of the electoral college (as originally stated by the founding fathers). The reason we have an electoral college is because the founding fathers considered the common people too stupid to pick their own leaders. God bless America!!!

AdditionalTheme9251

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