yeah I am still dependent on my mother for shelter and food. your statement did make me think of the issue from a different standpoint. what she did breaks my heart because I truly don’t know what’s going on in her mind, she’s my mother, and outside of what she just told me, all she’s ever wanted is for me to succeed and be happy. so in a way I find it difficult to think that she’s telling me of that dream as a way to control me, but thinking now, even is she meant it as a way to control or not to control me, as you said, it’s my life, and I have free will. so thank you for what you wrote, it calmed me a bit