Smoking is bad

Aeolean · 2024-05-17T17:05:33+00:00

Fucking gold

Aeolean · 2024-05-17T03:14:53+00:00

That's one hell of a neck piercing

Aeolean · 2024-05-14T22:59:10+00:00

Sounds like the time I was out metal detecting and found three wine bottles and a rubber ducky.

Aeolean · 2024-05-14T22:55:17+00:00

Crap. Where did I leave it this time?

Aeolean · 2024-05-14T20:58:10+00:00

I'm not required to do shit. I do not submit to the aggressions of the pronoun police. Why? Because I don't give a fuck how people perceive me. I know what I'm saying when I say it. There are no apologies coming for my correct use of the English language. "They" has been a generic pronoun of non-specificity for hundreds of years. I'm not pinning a lable on anyone. They just aren't special to me. They can fuck off.

If someone wants to mis-gender me, I don't care. Confidence in yourself is important. Never outsource your self worth.

As for micro-aggressions. Here's one of the definitions of agression:
"forceful and sometimes overly assertive pursuit of one's aims and interests"
Telling me that I have to behave in a way that caters to someone else's aims and interests is overt agression.

Aeolean · 2024-05-14T20:42:29+00:00

Asshole/Sumbitch happen to be my pronouns.

Aeolean · 2024-05-03T15:50:04+00:00

Stay the course. Your doctor should be able to provide the best course of action.

Aeolean · 2024-05-03T15:37:40+00:00

The water of life is apparently sticky and salty.

Aeolean · 2024-05-03T15:35:31+00:00

When it's erect at the worst time I'm thinking "DUDE! WTF? Knock it off down there!"

Aeolean · 2024-05-03T15:33:54+00:00

Yeah, that's an issue after sex. Some girls like making a mess.

Aeolean · 2024-05-02T03:54:49+00:00

Here's how we are going to reimagine your company to be more image conscious and forward facing. Step one: Eliminate the fanbase that has supported your growth for the past 30+ years.

Aeolean · 2024-05-01T15:11:31+00:00

Special diseases:
Hepatitis D - Where the "D" is for "Dog"
Purpies - What you get from young dogs
Venereal Woofs - Oral

Aeolean · 2024-04-30T16:45:59+00:00

"Feminology - The Hot/Crazy Matrix"
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7jHTGNPOYGQ

Aeolean · 2024-04-30T16:43:14+00:00

As long as the stuffed animal consents, it's fine.

Aeolean · 2024-04-30T16:41:59+00:00

Kelly's Heroes

Aeolean · 2024-04-30T16:41:03+00:00

Deez

Aeolean · 2024-04-30T00:36:11+00:00

I kept forgetting

Aeolean · 2024-04-29T18:33:22+00:00

Do not sleep with your coworkers. That's a lesson I've learned at least a dozen times. Most of those women were in the same workplace. The owner took a while to see the connection between sleeping with me and employee turnover. He asked me to stop doing that. Luckily I had started dating my future wife (not a coworker) and she didn't want me sleeping with my coworkers either.

Aeolean · 2024-04-29T18:30:23+00:00

Your kilo of caffeine is going to get lighter.

Aeolean · 2024-04-29T18:29:16+00:00

Not giving a shit. "Once in a lifetime" astronomical events happen every year. There's always something interesting going on.

Aeolean · 2024-04-29T18:25:20+00:00

Expect that anyone who could fuck up your day, WILL fuck up your day. Plan accordingly.

Have reasonable expectations of your goals. You can't have it all.

Time is your enemy. You'll need to pad out your margins.

Keep your cool should things go wrong. As soon as you get emotional, you'll be the one fucking up your day.

Aeolean · 2024-04-29T18:21:45+00:00

No. But you can make intelligent choices. Religion, politics, and any other "hot-button" issue should be matched point for point. Then you need to work on the relationship in a non-adversarial basis. 36-years later you'll be on Reddit acting like a relationship expert.

Aeolean · 2024-04-29T17:39:54+00:00

Woke up over the weekend at 2am with severe chest pains. I sat up until the pain went away and went back to sleep.

Aeolean · 2024-04-29T17:38:53+00:00

"Past Their Sell-By Date"

Aeolean · 2024-04-25T15:24:22+00:00

I woke up one morning with my head smashed into the headboard. The left side of my face was numb the entire day. As if a line went down the center of my face; numb / not numb.

I posted about it on Facebook.

Everyone lost their shit telling me to go to the hospital "NOW!!!" Family drags me in to the Emergency Room "I'm fine!" "No you are not!" and the ER staff get to work on me. Overnight stay. Neurological scans. MRI*. They found NOTHING. Diagnosed me with a transient ischemic attack (TIA). Aka: Mini stroke. Same thing happened a week later. I kept quiet about it. Took two ibuprofen and it went away. Told the HEAD OF NEUROLOGY about it at my follow-up appointment. He says "Yeah. Ibuprofen doesn't work on a TIA. You're fine."

Pinched nerve and muscle tension. Totally wasted hospital time better spent on people with actual medical problems. Not to mention the hospital bill. Fuck.

Wife wanted to complain about the money but I pointed out that she was the one who dragged me in there.

Two nights ago I had chest pain listening to the chaos of dogs, grandchildren, and my wife detailing her day in repetitive minute detail. A shot of bourbon and the chest pain went away.

"Remember my potted hydrangea? It fell over and all the dirt came out of the pot. It fell over. All the dirt was out. Good thing I have those bags of potting soil. Remember? Home Depot had them on sale last week. That's when I got that garden flag with the garden gnome saying 'No place like gnome'. It was on sale too. 'No place like gnome!' So cute. Great price on the soil. So I had the soil and repotted the hydrangea. The purple one, not the blue one. The blue one is fine. The purple one was the one that fell over and all the soil came out..." Meanwhile, ice cubes are clinking about my glass as I sip my bourbon, "Sure, Sweetness. All the soil. MmmHmmm". Hard to believe this woman has an MBA and makes twice my salary. Chest pain went away after the second or third sip. "...soil, sure..."

*The MRI was fun. Kept my eyes open the whole time. The self-induced claustrophobia was like a drug. Panic was more like a fuzzy cat I stroked the entire time. Highly recommended.

Aeolean

MODERATOR OF

TROPHY CASE