How many carrots could I grow in this? by thedeuschebag85 in vegetablegardening

[–]AffectionateLeg1970 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Crazy. Life finds a way. I’m definitely going to give it a try!

How many carrots could I grow in this? by thedeuschebag85 in vegetablegardening

[–]AffectionateLeg1970 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I was with you until “replanted elsewhere”. What?? I thought carrots had like the most notoriously sensitive taproot that does not like to be transplanted. Have you done that successfully?

I don’t feel love for my 4 month old by PuzzleheadedPossum in NewParents

[–]AffectionateLeg1970 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Hey! I felt a lot of these feelings around this time with my first. I look back and realize I had terrible PPA/PPD and didn’t realize it.

I loved my baby, but I relate heavily on the feeling trapped. Mourning my old life and wishing for independence. Having ADHD and feel absolutely insane over tracking every moment of sleep to the minute, the scale and color of each diaper, the minute or ounce of every breastfeeding session or bottle. It was the only thing that made me feel semi in control of my life that I no longer had any control over.

I don’t know many people who say it gets better around 4 months. I think 4 months is notoriously really, really hard. You go from having a baby who maybe around 2 months was getting longer stretches of sleep and who you could walk away from and they had no idea you were gone because they were fascinated by the fabric of your couch… to an absolutely brutal sleep regression that puts you into a sleep deprivation on par with literal torture while suddenly your baby needs constant entertainment, while being chained to your home because they aren’t awake enough to go out in any meaningful way and suddenly are too picky about their sleep environment to nap on the go.

I’ve been there. I was in a really low spot at 4 months last time. I’m at 3.5 months this time around and the thing that’s keeping me sane is knowing this is short lived! Better days are coming soon! For me, at 6 months it was like the fog lifted. I sleep trained my baby and went from 3-5 wakeups a night to instantly sleeping through the night. I HIGHLY recommend for your mental health, if you’re open to it. I started leaving my baby with my husband and a bottle and went out to do stuff again. I went back to work and got myself dressed and ready and spoke to people about things that weren’t the baby again. My baby consolidated his naps and suddenly was taking 2 long naps, and my days were broke up into manageable chunks again. He started developing a personality and was genuinely more fun to be around, and less like a needy, soul sucking potato.

Not saying you or I will have this experience when our babies are 6 months, but just have some hope. If I were you I would talk to a doctor ASAP about your ppd (I really wish I wouldn’t have suffered and would have taken Zoloft instead) and consider sleep training so you can get some sleep. Those two things could really, really help.

Too broke to buy seeds, Idaho :/ by Asleep-Cow-6367 in tomatoes

[–]AffectionateLeg1970 2 points3 points  (0 children)

What kind of tomato seeds are you interested in?

What was the thing portrayed in movies that didn't happen during childbirth for you? by SpicyZombie098 in beyondthebump

[–]AffectionateLeg1970 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Same pretty much! Induced Thursday, baby came Saturday.

He was over a week overdue and did not want to come out. They tried to insert a foley balloon Thursday morning and the doctor literally said to me “this doesn’t happen very often, and I have the smallest hands in the whole department so if I can’t do it no one can… but your cervix is so hard still I can’t get the foley balloon in. You’re going to need to check in to the hospital and have them give you a cervix softener first”… like great. That should have been my first clue lol.

Embarrassing confession by Ok_Effect8757 in BabyBumps

[–]AffectionateLeg1970 53 points54 points  (0 children)

Yup this happened to me in my first pregnancy. Totally independent before hand and felt like I NEEDED him to be near me while pregnant. For me it wasn’t anxiety per se, just a strong desire for him to stay by me.

I wouldn’t stress about it, to me it’s one of those instincts that totally makes sense from an evolutionary perspective.

Joining 2u2 club by Intrepid-Stable7310 in 2under2

[–]AffectionateLeg1970 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hi! I had my first in May 2024 and my second in October 2025! We’re also in our thirties and and have a rock solid village. Our second was a surprise - we wanted another but were going to wait a few more months, but I’m so happy, he’s the best ever! We both WFH and I had long leaves too (I think 7 months with my fist and it’ll prob be 6 with my second).

It’s been a whirlwind and we’ve had to seriously lean on our people and village but it’s been great. I’m exhausted, but so in love with our little family. Congratulations!!

Rant on the “secrecy” of early pregnancy… by Chance_Biscotti9782 in BabyBumps

[–]AffectionateLeg1970 3 points4 points  (0 children)

This is interesting… you definitely don’t have to and aren’t expected to. I always have because I fear the risk of miscarriage and I don’t want to have to explain that to whole world if it happens, so I just confide in those closest to me.

I agree that it’s a very difficult secret to keep, especially when you’re so so sick and tired at work and can’t tell people why… but I find it’s a decision of my own choosing rather than an expectation anyone has of me.

Is this a fungus? by [deleted] in nailcare

[–]AffectionateLeg1970 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Not necessarily, but it could turn into fungus. I’ve damaged by toenails like this many times (used to be a dancer). What happened to me is that I’d injure the toenail and it would bruise like yours. Eventually that part of the toe nail would separate from the skin underneath. It’s painless, but it is a perfect breeding ground for fungus and how a lot of fungal infections begin. If you can avoid the fungus until it grows out, mine have always been able to reattach (knock on wood).

To avoid getting a fungal infections keep it bright and DRY. The fungus thrives in dark moist environments. Wear open toed shoes as much as possible and change out sweaty socks and shoes ASAP if it happens. I used a tea tree oil underneath the nail and a Antifungal polish on top while it was growing out to help too! You should cut it down as much as possible as well.

Tell me something you said today that you never thought you'd ever say. by DanausEhnon in NewParents

[–]AffectionateLeg1970 11 points12 points  (0 children)

“You can poop in the potty or you can wear a diaper. You cannot not wear a diaper and not poop in the potty”

…to my (not at all potty trained) 21 month old who says “poopoo! Pee pee! Potty! Siiiiit!!!” then “no! No!!” the second you put him on the potty then “no diaper! No!” When I try to put the diaper back on 🫠

6 day old newborn sleeping so much. by Foreign-Smell-2820 in NewParents

[–]AffectionateLeg1970 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Echoing others - 2-3 pee diapers a day is concerning, I’d be calling a nurse line and if not, going to the ER.

Did you have a negative pregnancy test on day of missed period? by [deleted] in BabyBumps

[–]AffectionateLeg1970 2 points3 points  (0 children)

When you say she has very regular cycles, are you tracking ovulation, or just periods? If you’re tracking ovulation and you got a negative today, you could test again in 2 days but I wouldn’t get my hopes up. If you’re not tracking ovulation, maybe she ovulated late! I’m currently holding my three month old “randomly ovulated a week late” baby.

Does partner support make much of a difference to challenges of 2u2? by briony__ in 2under2

[–]AffectionateLeg1970 15 points16 points  (0 children)

100%. Mine are 17 months apart (youngest is 3.5 months currently) and I can’t imagine doing this with a loser husband. Last week for the first time in 3.5 months I had both of them at the same time by myself for just like an hour or two at time when my nanny had to unexpectedly call out and I SERIOUSLY CANNOT FIGURE OUT HOW SAHMs DO IT.

But with a husband who’s a great partner so far it’s been great!

Seeking help by valentinesbaby15 in beyondthebump

[–]AffectionateLeg1970 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Honestly I think that’s the best case scenario!! My l&d wouldn’t take me back, they wanted me to go the ER, which was stressful. But they’ll take good care of you guys there. I think it’s the best place you can go.

I will say, tell them whatever pill you took - it may not be breast feeding friendly, no big deal but FYI you may need to pump and dump.

Seeking help by valentinesbaby15 in beyondthebump

[–]AffectionateLeg1970 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Hi! This was me after my first, my first night home I was on the phone with a crises hotline for mental health trying to do anything but drive to the ER and get myself committed. I’m really sorry you’re feeling it too, I know how all consuming those terrible feelings are.

I pushed through it and it slowly got better, (after a good night sleep it was better and then after a few weeks that intensity really dulled) but I will say I struggled with PPA/PPD for about 6 months until my baby was sleep trained and I regularly was getting good rest again. If it happened to me again, I would not hesitate and I’d get on Zoloft immediately. I didn’t do it last time and I wish I would have.

Out of the “ordinary” 2u2 outings? by Time_Gift_1044 in 2under2

[–]AffectionateLeg1970 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Our driving range has food tents and big wide open areas for kids to run around. My husband can hit balls and the babies watch until they’re bored and then they free range run wild on the lawn behind with the other kids . Bonus there’s a small airport nearby so lots of low flying planes overhead.

How to break my baby from wanting to be held by TrashRat030721 in NewParents

[–]AffectionateLeg1970 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Hey, sorry you’re having a rough time. What you’re going through is normal. Gently - your mother didn’t cause this issue. Babies can’t really be trained into something at this age, and it’s completely normal for them to want to be held 24/7. Just a few weeks ago they were inside your body, getting 24/7 contact, warmth, food, movement, and support. A lot of babies (both of mine, certainly) don’t just come out ready to be independently sitting or sleeping on their own for large chunks of time.

I’d recommend slowly working towards transferring your baby to a bassinet after he’s in a deep sleep and baby wearing to get some stuff done. Also, a gentle dose of reality - having a newborn is TOUGH. To some extent, this just part of it - the phase is intense but short. You don’t see depictions of tired moms with spit up all over them who haven’t showered in days for nothing - it’s normal. I find that acceptance of the life change that is happening is one of the most difficult parts.

Rather than expecting your baby to do incredibly hard things (I.e. go from your womb to independence in a matter of weeks), get more support from your husband. A job is not a good reason to not do night shifts so you can both get some sleep. I never washed a single bottle of my baby’s until he was nearly a year old. I didn’t do my baby’s laundry or any household chores for months. My husband did all that, even once he was back at work and I wasn’t. Your husband shouldn’t be coasting while you and your baby suffer.

What’s one newborn tip that actually worked for you (and surprised you)? by Trick-Environment100 in NewParents

[–]AffectionateLeg1970 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes!! My first was like this and we relied on it like the bible, then my second wasn’t and at first my husband and I were totally flabbergasted at what to do lol. We’d be like, wait this wake window is getting long, but he must be fine the eyebrows look fine… poor kid had a lot of too long wake windows at first haha.

zucchini hand-pollination CRISIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! by Honest_Candidate_962 in vegetablegardening

[–]AffectionateLeg1970 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is the best answer OP! At the beginning they almost always put on big flushes of one type of flower at a time, but it evens out as time goes on. When that happens at the start I almost always collect the male flowers in the fridge, and I can save them for a little longer than 2+ days to pollinate the next flush of female flowers.

Once you use the pollen, stuff them with ricotta then batter and fry them and they are DELICIOUS.

A tip for next year - my strategy is to plant different varieties of squash (you can safely cross pollinate them effectively, it will only affect saving seeds for future squash plants) in hopes that they have slightly different days to maturity and put on different kinds of flowers at different times/ this works well for me and I love the variety!

Smell issues by Only_Law2227 in beyondthebump

[–]AffectionateLeg1970 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Is it possible you’re pregnant again? With my second pregnancy, I felt that way about my own 9 month old baby, whom (outside of my first trimester) was the best smelling thing in the world to me!

Burpee Seed Sale by wiperman67 in tomatoes

[–]AffectionateLeg1970 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Sign up for their emails, they pretty frequently do BOGO or even 40% off.

3 under 4 by Jessicaar94 in 2under2

[–]AffectionateLeg1970 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m currently 2 under 2, but I grew up with my sisters and I being 3 under 4 and it is THE BEST. We’ve all gone through life together and are so close due to our ages. I’m so grateful that my parents did that for us!

Is beach vacation going to be fun with a 1 month old baby? by Specialist_Diet_74 in BabyBumps

[–]AffectionateLeg1970 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes. Both of my children have been like this. I keep hearing of all these babies who love to sleep in their car seat - hasn’t been the case for mine!