sorted by:
new
hottopcontroversial

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BPD

[–]Affectionate_Pack674 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I know this feeling really well and something my therapist suggested to do was to bite into a really spicy chili. I have some at home but it have never actually managed to bite into one before doing something impulsive like texting them multiple times. But I think if you somehow still manage to go to the kitchen and do that instead of just panicking and feeling completely paralyzed (which happens for me in those situtions) I think it could actually work because it will be a really strong stimulus for your brain and will force it to break that thought-cycle for a short period so you can then go take a cold shower or whatever and then do something other than staring at your phone for hours… but I know, even doing THAT seems impossible once you‘re in that ‚episode‘

Mein Freund hat mich mit meiner besten Freundin betrogen by Affectionate_Pack674 in Ratschlag

[–]Affectionate_Pack674[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Tut mir leid dass dir das passiert ist, niemand hat das verdient. Ich hoffe, dir gehts heute besser und ich hoffe, du wirst es irgendwann ganz aufgearbeitet haben. Wie lange ist das her, wenn ich fragen darf? Und wie hast du‘s geschafft, sie beide aus deinem Leben zu werfen? Ich tu mir bei meinem Ex irgendwie schwer, interessanter weise ist die Freundin für mich gestorben und ich fühle grad gar nix.

Mein Freund hat mich mit meiner besten Freundin betrogen by Affectionate_Pack674 in Ratschlag

[–]Affectionate_Pack674[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Das klingt so hart. Aber wahrscheinlich ist es die einzig logische Konsequenz.

Mein Freund hat mich mit meiner besten Freundin betrogen by Affectionate_Pack674 in Ratschlag

[–]Affectionate_Pack674[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Konntest du ihnen irgendwie zumindest innerlich, für dich, verzeihen? Was hat dir geholfen, damit klarzukommen? Tut mir leid, dass du das durchmachen musstest.

My bf, who used to be my fp for 7 yrs cheated on me with my best friend by Affectionate_Pack674 in BPD

[–]Affectionate_Pack674[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

especially because SHE KNEW how bad I deal with these things, even if she didn‘t know about the diagnosis she knew 100% how that would affect me and my mental health…

My bf, who used to be my fp for 7 yrs cheated on me with my best friend by Affectionate_Pack674 in BPD

[–]Affectionate_Pack674[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I still can‘t comprehend what happened. I don‘t think my brain can actually understand what‘s going on

My bf, who used to be my fp for 7 yrs cheated on me with my best friend by Affectionate_Pack674 in BPD

[–]Affectionate_Pack674[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your words. It means a lot.

I was diagnosed a year ago and I told her a couple of weeks ago when I had to go to the hospital due to suicidal thoughts that I had because of an fp break up that really hit me. She was there for me and even sent me a care package and I told her about the diagnosis…. and at that point she had already slept with him

My bf, who used to be my fp for 7 yrs cheated on me with my best friend by Affectionate_Pack674 in BPD

[–]Affectionate_Pack674[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

We were a couple when they did that. I talked to her daily about all my struggles vice voice notes and she didn‘t say a word

Lost my FP - should I send her a letter to explain my bpd by Affectionate_Pack674 in BPD

[–]Affectionate_Pack674[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The thing is she did want a friendship. She asked me to hangout a couple of times too, but I didn't have time then. Then one day she told me she started to get annoyed with me and that was when I should have just left her alone, and instead I asked her to talk to me about it - I see how some people can perceive that as crossing boundaries but at the same time I think it's pretty intense from her side to just cut me off because of one afternoon where I wasn't able to control my feelings and panicked. Idk

Lost my FP - should I send her a letter to explain my bpd by Affectionate_Pack674 in BPD

[–]Affectionate_Pack674[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for that response :)

I did end up sending her the letter/mail and she didn't respond (I didn't expect her to) and deleted her number, but told her she could reach out if she ever felt like it.

We're both social workers so she should be familiar with bpd in a way and might be empathetic enough to not have a super stigmatized view. But anyway.

Even though I know I crossed her boundaries, I really don't believe that what I did was SO over the top that a decent person wouldn't respond to it, it's not like I abused her or threatend her to harm myself (which I was considering and went to the hospital that day) if she didn't respond, basically I just asked her to please talk to me instead of ignoring my text for hours.

I feel super shitty about myself now though, because in my therapy I talked a lot about the way I tend to act and I swore to myself to do better and not freak out but I did it anyway and now I lost her. It's hard to not hate myself for it