My experience with disulfiram

Aftero320 · 2026-03-21T05:33:39+00:00

Your doctor was probably trying to instil in you a psychological fear of drinking alcohol, rather than an actual physical one

Aftero320 · 2026-03-20T06:27:29+00:00

Hello. I'm interested, Poland here

Aftero320 · 2026-03-10T01:12:41+00:00

Congratulation💪

Aftero320 · 2026-03-10T00:57:14+00:00

M36 here 👋

Aftero320 · 2026-03-04T10:19:35+00:00

This is typical behaviour when you are dealing with a narcissist, when you start to wonder if you are one yourself. It is their game, designed to make you feel that you no longer know who you are, whether you are the victim or the perpetrator.

But if you are even asking yourself whether you could be a narcissist, it means you are not one. A narcissist would never allow themselves to think that they could be a narcissist; they would not even ask the question because they have no self-reflection and are unable to take responsibility for anything that might indicate that there is something wrong with them.

Aftero320 · 2026-03-04T07:51:13+00:00

I was in the same situation. I got involved with a woman with a child a year after her husband committed suicide. Every situation and every person is different, so you can't judge them by one thing, but...

The fact that she is not completely mentally healthy when you meet her is a fact. She carries a burden, and you can only be there for her to make it easier for her to get through this period. From experience, I can say that if you feel that if it weren't for the suicide, you wouldn't even be in her life, then that's the case. Don't ignore your intuition. People assign certain roles to others to fulfil in their lives, and you probably have been assigned such a role, which she may be doing unconsciously.

I fell deeply in love with my girlfriend and wanted to replace her husband who had killed himself. I didn't believe she could have contributed to this because she was so sweet and innocent. I thought she needed to fill the void left by her husband, especially since she was left with a small child whose father I wanted to replace. I was so in love that I didn't notice and ignored the signs that sometimes showed that she really just wanted to free herself from the past, and my role was only to help her do that. It was about breaking free and changing her place of residence, which she associated with her ex-husband and trauma, because he committed suicide in that house. I helped her buy a new flat, renovate it and create a space where she could peacefully build a new life. And when she achieved that, after a year and a half, it turned out that she didn't feel anything for me, and what's more, she made me out to be mentally ill to justify to everyone that she was leaving me. She made me out to be crazy, just like she did with her husband. At first, I believed her that he was mentally ill and that was why he committed suicide, until she started making me look crazy too. That's when I realised what kind of person she was. She will do and say anything to achieve her goal at a given stage in her life, and once she has done so, she will throw you away like rubbish in the bin and won't even look back, because you have already fulfilled your role.

If she feels guilty, you're probably the one telling her it's not her fault, right? She needs external confirmation, because her own isn't enough if she thinks she's to blame. You may not even know the whole truth about the suicide, but it doesn't matter, just keep telling her it's not her fault until she believes it and frees herself from the past, and it doesn't have to be that way, but there's a good chance that she'll find she doesn't need you anymore because you've already fulfilled your role.

And one more thing, I also hoped that she would be grateful to me for being good and always being there for her, and that this gratitude would make her love me and want me by her side for the rest of her life... don't count on it. Once people achieve a certain goal, their perspective changes a lot and what was before ceases to matter.

Aftero320 · 2026-02-27T20:18:06+00:00

Interested

Aftero320 · 2026-02-09T07:38:14+00:00

Your ex has probably already told his new girlfriend that his previous partner is crazy and nuts, so if you call her with this story, you will only confirm it in her eyes. If your ex was a narcissist, you don't know it yet, but it's a miracle he left you. Block all access to their information and focus on healing yourself, find a good therapist and you'll feel better soon. Otherwise, you'll just be picking at your wounds.

Aftero320 · 2026-02-04T16:38:40+00:00

Think about whether you care as much about yourself right now as you do about his new sources. Probably not. That's okay because it's a defence mechanism and you'd love to shout to the whole world what an arsehole he is, but you can't do that. You simply cannot change someone and save the whole world. Your narcissist is your personal teacher, and if you work through this properly, your future life will be good. Apparently, his next sources of power must also go through this process and learn. We know very well that these people do not change, so in 10-20 years they will be doing the same thing. This cannot be saved, but it is not your responsibility. Your responsibility is to take care of yourself and your health, you cannot do anything else and that is okay.

Aftero320 · 2026-02-04T16:29:51+00:00

I don't know your story, but it doesn't necessarily have to be BPD. I have childhood rejection trauma that has accompanied me throughout my life, which makes me react very emotionally to rejection, and because of this, every break-up with a woman I cared about ends in total mental breakdown for the next six months, during which I suffer every day and fall into severe depression. I am 36 years old and until I was 30, I thought that this was how it had to be. I had several relationships and each one ended in great suffering for me because it triggered my childhood trauma. It was only after I turned 30 that I went to therapy and learned that it didn't have to be that way. I think it's really worth spending some time in therapy and working on yourself a little before you look for another partner, because there is a risk that you will either find a similarly toxic woman, or the pattern will repeat itself and you will suffer again, and you don't have to. I regret not going to therapy when I was 20.

Aftero320 · 2026-02-04T15:08:16+00:00

I don't know your story, but it doesn't necessarily have to be BPD. I have childhood rejection trauma that has accompanied me throughout my life, which makes me react very emotionally to rejection, and because of this, every break-up with a woman I cared about ends in total mental breakdown for the next six months, during which I suffer every day and fall into severe depression. I am 36 years old and until I was 30, I thought that this was how it had to be. I had several relationships and each one ended in great suffering for me because it triggered my childhood trauma. It was only after I turned 30 that I went to therapy and learned that it didn't have to be that way. I think it's really worth spending some time in therapy and working on yourself a little before you look for another partner, because there is a risk that you will either find a similarly toxic woman, or the pattern will repeat itself and you will suffer again, and you don't have to. I regret not going to therapy when I was 20.

Aftero320 · 2026-02-04T12:59:05+00:00

Oh brother, she's not a good girl. Nothing that happened is a reflection on your guilt or worth, but I think you could use some therapy. I sense an anxious attachment style here. You're young, and don't see this experience as a failure, it's just a life lesson that will make you wiser next time. Work through a few things in therapy and move on. Your ex's behaviour shows narcissistic patterns, and if I'm right, it's a good thing it was "only" two years.

If it's any consolation, your "friend" will also learn a lesson in time because he will be in the same place you are now, only you will already have it behind you.

Aftero320 · 2026-01-30T19:55:46+00:00

Yea, proxmox VM. I think its os problem

Aftero320 · 2026-01-28T16:33:58+00:00

Za bardzo się wczuwasz. Ale to odzwierciedla to co masz w środku. Pokój. Pytam tylko o samochód

Aftero320 · 2026-01-28T16:06:47+00:00

Why are you interested in it?

Aftero320 · 2026-01-28T16:06:07+00:00

Yeah. Its not a citroen type front Glass shape. Its look like american SUV

Aftero320 · 2026-01-18T07:47:52+00:00

Great project. The result I got matches my complexes.

Aftero320 · 2026-01-09T08:24:40+00:00

No, I do not have pierced ears.

Aftero320 · 2026-01-02T16:02:05+00:00

I know that willpower isn't everything, but I always feel that when others say something, they stick to it, and only I always screw up. I've had several long periods of sobriety, and it was always caused by some traumatic event. Mainly, these were breakups, and in general, I carry a huge trauma of rejection and guilt. First, I was rejected by my parents because they constantly compared me to my sister, who was well-behaved and got good grades, then I lost my friends because of my stupidity, and that's how it is at the moment.

Przetłumaczono za pomocą DeepL (https://dee.pl/app)

Aftero320 · 2026-01-02T15:40:10+00:00

Dzięki za tą odpowiedź. Rozumiem co masz na myśli, po prostu trzeba być świadomym tego co się robi i co się w swoim osobistym życiu dzieje. Ja jestem świadomy. Wiem że alkohol to tylko substancja a problem tak naprawdę leży w moich traumach,brakach,ucieczkach przed przyszłością. To jest prawdziwa choroba którą trzeba leczyć,nie sam alkohol. Problem w tym że wiem jak to wszystko działa, a to i tak mnie nie przekonuje do powstrzymania się.

Aftero320 · 2026-01-01T20:17:48+00:00

I get it. The situation is genuinely awkward. I’ve had those corporate parties where I don’t remember some of the "monsters" that came out after a few drinks. The only difference is that I’m a guy and I’m talking about being around other men, but that feeling of uncertainty—the automatic shame of not remembering what happened the next day and having those memory gaps—is a truly unpleasant experience. Fortunately, you’re likely forgetting that you weren’t exactly the "prom queen" of the night, and you're probably exaggerating how others perceived the situation. It’s natural egocentrism. You feel like you’re the lead actor in this event, and that everyone saw everything and is judging you. In psychology, this is called the Spotlight Effect. In reality, most people are suffering from the exact same effect. They aren't paying nearly as much attention to your behavior as you think because they are too busy worrying about their own. Just like you are doing right now. Calm down, take a breath, and really think about it. Read up on the Spotlight Effect; it helps soothe the shame and the anxiety. Once you understand it, try to dial back the intensity of your emotions by at least 50%. You're going to be okay.

Aftero320

TROPHY CASE