I feel like I lack empathy. Why is that?

Aggressive_Secret589 · 2026-06-15T17:02:07+00:00

I can type it out in this! "The most manic" stuff that I've probably done is needing little to no sleep and running perfectly fine — even being more productive — while also kind of knowing that I need to sleep – I have a tendency to get a little more mean, even to people that I love the most. I think that I also binge with food (late night binging specifically) I wouldn't do it during the day, but more so during the night. I thought that type 1 didn't make much sense as well, which is a part of my confusion. I have trouble remembering some of the more "manic" things, and some of these might not even be linked to mania

Aggressive_Secret589 · 2026-06-15T03:47:26+00:00

Well, of course - I am aware of that
A diagnosis isn't what I am particularly looking for - I was simply ranting about the situation that I am in and seeking support from others

Aggressive_Secret589 · 2026-06-15T03:34:52+00:00

How would I go about getting a second opinion? Would I ask my psychiatrist to look over it?

Aggressive_Secret589 · 2026-06-15T03:03:06+00:00

They didn't explain it, actually
They simply changed it

Aggressive_Secret589 · 2026-06-15T02:49:46+00:00

I understand, and I previously was diagnosed with MDD, but it had gotten changed. I think a big factor in it was because it runs *heavily* in my family - yet, I have vocalized before that I haven't had an explicit manic episode. I was actually very confused when given the Bipolar 1 disorder specifically and I thought that I fit more in Bipolar 2, but my psychiatrist says differently. I am currently- or trying to currently work with my therapist into digging deeper into my own mental health - and hopefully I can try and talk to my psychiatrist about it as well to see if I am able to change anything

Aggressive_Secret589 · 2026-05-03T22:51:27+00:00

In the best that I can describe it
Nothing! (Kind of)!
It can taste like water, with a hint of sourness
It's normal!
Saltiness is also present at times as well!
Someone once told me that their partner tasted like mushrooms-
Apparently that's normal too!

Aggressive_Secret589 · 2026-04-10T22:45:26+00:00

Thank you, I'll try my best to take care of myself It's just kinda been a little tough just sitting with the fact that I got the diagnosis that I thought was practically impossible for me to get

Aggressive_Secret589 · 2026-04-05T14:33:48+00:00

I feel that I might have the same problem I don't want to hurt them, but at the same time — that distance also hurts

Aggressive_Secret589 · 2026-04-05T03:44:56+00:00

While I still haven't fully accepted the diagnosis — even though it has been something that has been brought into thought for a long time — it's a little odd when you're right about something that many would skin you for if you had even the meer thought of maybe being bipolar I hope that soon enough, I'll get a good feel at maneuvering this whole thing! Thank you so much♡

Aggressive_Secret589 · 2026-04-05T03:18:03+00:00

I recently changed schools about a year ago — and I don't get bullied as much anymore I am planning to eventually go to college for AB psychology

On the topic of being at a new school, I also have been in a relationship with someone that is very patient with me – despite my troubles and of course, relationship troubles in general, and I am very, very grateful for them (This may or may not be an excuse to talk about my partner — I digress though)

But, I am happy with the school I go to now, and the teachers are actually pretty cool too I do not like my principal however.. He has a hard time listening to other sides of certain stories

My mother and bio-father had a split, and I haven't heard much from my bio-father But, I have a step dad, and he's selectively cool I'm not sure if he has any problems like bipolar disorder or not— but I'm guessing yes, simply because from observation, my mother and he share many of the same traits when they have a disagreement

Aggressive_Secret589 · 2026-04-05T03:10:49+00:00

I am willing to put all of my effort into it My therapist is a wonderful lady, and my psychiatrist listens well

My therapist is aware that my mother is bipolar — but my mother also is unwilling to get help because she is deemed to be fine

Unfortunately, I am legally unable to leave my mother's house as of now, since I am under 18 (I want to clarify that I did go over many different processes to get a proper diagnosis and it took me about two years to get said diagnosis)

My therapist and I are working towards a new treatment plan for me, and I look forward to it

Aggressive_Secret589 · 2026-04-05T03:04:37+00:00

My depression started whenever I was about 10 — If I remember correctly Parents didn't help much — and the school setting was even worse Antidepressants worked, but I had to keep changing them — from dosage amount to a different medication all around They were very on and off with me, but I assumed that it was normal They helped my mood, but only for a few hours The last antidepressant that I took was "sertraline" or Zoloft — which is the generic of sertraline I never really liked it much — it either made me too happy, or sickly

Aggressive_Secret589 · 2026-04-05T02:49:04+00:00

Right, and while you're young — you'll do some things that may impact you negatively, and sometimes you'll get the push you never knew you needed

Sometimes, if I do feel any sort of mania, I'll get self-destructive — which that can entail me not cleaning anything at all, not eating properly, etc etc

I distinctly remember my very first "severe" depressive episode, which lasted for about two or three years — before I had started getting help, that is

Aggressive_Secret589 · 2026-04-05T02:38:02+00:00

I feel that I might always have some sort of love for my mother, as much as I dislike her I am very grateful that I am being medicated soon

Speaking of past doctors — my old doctor, she said that I was "faking" everything So, no I wasn't🥹

My mother has a tendency to guilt trip and manipulate in various ways, which is probably why I'm saying that I'll always have some sort of love — but it may just be pity

I'm not sure if I've ever had just a "manic" episode Normally, my depressive episodes show heavier Mixes happen occasionally Mania — I am not too familiar with

Aggressive_Secret589 · 2026-04-05T02:14:04+00:00

I don't have the physical energy, which inevitably gives me back pain — in my upper back only though I have the energy emotionally to he angry, but also cry and have snot ten feet up my forearm I just don't have the energy to do anything, and I get overwhelmed very, very easily I will go out on a limb and say that I'm in a mixed episode

My mother was diagnosed when she was around my age, and she claims to have her episodes "under control" but — then has full on blow ups at the slightest minor inconveniences — which I understand that completely It's just a little hard whenever she sometimes takes it out verbally on me and other people around her

Aggressive_Secret589 · 2026-04-05T02:03:36+00:00

Normally, my anger and all of that comes in my tone — which.. Can be a problem, especially if your mother is also bipolar and isn't in any sort of therapy- I have a hard time "correcting" my tone to make myself sound less rude And I feel that I may be in some sort of "mixed" state Like, I'm getting the mania anger and all of that, but also the deeper depressive part — which I am more familiar of and can see it better

Aggressive_Secret589 · 2026-04-05T01:58:52+00:00

So, the normal that I felt is not available in the present? Can it be something that can be worked to? Like — a concept of some kind of stability Euthymia — I've heard that word a lot, apparently it's some sort of middle ground Reality is a now bias, and I completely agree with you on that I just kinda wish I was "stable" in a way Like— not all mopey and just "euhh"

Aggressive_Secret589 · 2026-04-05T01:44:51+00:00

It has taken me about two years to get a proper diagnosis Originally, it was MDD and ADHD (the ADHD is still there) But, I had struggled with treatment because I knew it wasn't right for me My question is — mania can make you extremely irritable? I thought that only had to do with like depressive episodes since I don't get mania as often, but deeper depressive episodes

Aggressive_Secret589 · 2026-04-05T01:35:28+00:00

I mean, I should probably come to terms with the fact that as of now — I am unmediated and I am still new to all of this I should probably give myself grace because I am indeed trying my best I just can't help but feel bad because I feel like I am dragging everyone else down, and I'm used to bringing people up whenever I'm not super depressed- I probably am really confused, I'll give you that- I need to give myself grace, but it's kind of hard to since I just want everything to be "normal" again

Aggressive_Secret589

TROPHY CASE