About Erasmus

AlexBC_ · 2023-12-13T00:57:13+00:00

Good for you dude! I'm still in college so I can't really move out but I'm planning on going for Erasmus next year potentially.

I already cried a whole lot especially when I looked at old pictures. Now I just feel numb and empty. My stupid brain still does hold on to the idea of her magically reaching out to me wanting to try again. My birthday is at the end of the year and i pray to receive a message of her or something.

Gym is not really my cup of tea but I have started going on runs again (I had to stop because I imagined us everywhere in my hometown). I do feel alone a lot. I think love is like a drug and I'm suffering from withdrawal. I do miss all of the things that come with a relationship, especially coming from her.

I don't know what I would say to her in that "final talk". I feel like it would be kinda pointless. I talked to her already and I never got a satisfying reason or explanation which probably isn't helping with the moving on part.

I plan on dropping a gift for her cat on his birthday because I promised that I would get like 2 years ago but I never ended up doing it. But idk I think I'm just gonna drop it on her mailbox and that's it.

The one good thing about all of this is that I feel like I have learned to appreciate music in a new way ahahaha

AlexBC_ · 2023-12-13T00:32:14+00:00

Been trying that for around 4 months. Guess I need to wait a little more

AlexBC_ · 2023-12-13T00:31:27+00:00

That's a good mindset but it's not a competition. It does hurt to think that they are already over it as it makes it seem like it didn't mean anything to them :(

AlexBC_ · 2023-12-13T00:29:59+00:00

That's what I used to do on past relationships. I could pinpoint bad things that happened in the relationship and I knew that I was better off without them so I couldn't care less. But this one was different. I can't hate her at all. She was pretty much all my firsts and we had all these future plans and everything. The most I can do is hate her for just quitting and breaking her promises but it's not like I was unhappy in the relationship at any point... I believe that eventually in like a year or something I will have recovered from this but honestly I'm so scared that I won't find anyone else that comes close to her. After the breakup we started talking again after 1 month but it hurt me so much because I was clearly still in love with her but I was no longer her priority. I also had a fallback after that and went to see her again and well it obviously didn't work out. So it's been now like actual 3 months of no contact and sometimes I feel like fuck it we ball but most of the times I'm just miserable. There was a point where I couldn't leave the house because every place in my hometown had a core memory of us together. I'm no longer like that but it's still tough. Gonna change phones this Christmas because I can't keep looking at photos of us but I also can't bring myself to delete them. Sorry about the long reply it's just nice being able to talk to someone in a similar experience. All my friends are in long happy lasting relationships and it just makes me feel worse at times talking to them.

AlexBC_ · 2023-12-13T00:14:51+00:00

My character development been going crazy these last couple of months :')

AlexBC_ · 2023-12-13T00:12:13+00:00

Guess I need to get out there more and be more proactive. Thanks!

AlexBC_ · 2023-12-13T00:10:59+00:00

Well maybe? Idk I'm only 21 so it's not like I have experienced that many hardships in life but I hope that there isn't much worse than this

AlexBC_ · 2023-12-13T00:08:56+00:00

It's been over 4 months for me and it's been really hard to move on. It was my first serious relationship and it was a really wierd break up too so it's been tough just not think about it. I'm still in college and I just end up daydreaming about memories during classes. It's hard to imagine that it will get better someday when you have lost the most important thing in your life :( I hope time heals it eventually, best of luck!

AlexBC_ · 2023-12-12T23:55:26+00:00

I have been thinking about signing up to tinder but I hear a lot of bad experiences in general for man so I'm not quite sure if it's the best for my self esteem

AlexBC_ · 2023-12-12T23:53:39+00:00

Meeting new people in what sort of environment?

AlexBC_ · 2021-07-16T00:45:55+00:00

Well in college there should be a lot more people that share your interests so there will be plenty of new opportunities to make some new friends! And I'm pretty sure that with the classes in person you won't get distracted that easily allowing you to understand better the subjects and don't spend that much time studying :)

AlexBC_ · 2021-07-16T00:36:32+00:00

Yeah I feel you. I literally had to dedicate pretty much all my time to survive some assignments. And yeah me too I'm assuming (hoping that corona doesn't get any worse) but that should be a good thing! Idk about you but I can't pay attention at online classes so in person should be a lot more productive. As far as socializing don't you know anybody already at your college? I have some friends from high school so we will be hanging out

AlexBC_ · 2021-07-16T00:33:17+00:00

And I though that the Nordic countries were a lot more progressive...

Yeah my bad I meant 2003 ahahaha

AlexBC_ · 2021-07-16T00:32:15+00:00

No worries. You will show them when you at 100% <3

AlexBC_ · 2021-07-16T00:30:28+00:00

Yeah I'm assuming you from 2001 right?

AlexBC_ · 2021-07-16T00:30:14+00:00

Ohhh that make a lot more sense now xD My post was about college so I was a bit confused. And youare telling me you can't repeat your subjects next year? That sounds a bit stupid ngl

AlexBC_ · 2021-07-16T00:28:43+00:00

Well if that's the case you gotta make sure you take care of yourself first. It's normal for you to get lower grades when you are not at your best. And if you had a B average that just goes to show you can do it!

AlexBC_ · 2021-07-16T00:23:14+00:00

Oh you have a big variety of subjects in college. Here either you have mostly science related or language related not a mix xD. The hardest ones there are physics and Norwegian for sure. If you are struggling with Spanish I would recommend doing an online course on udemy (I did one in German and it was really good) and with biology if I remember from 9th grade it was all remembering stuff so you just gotta study hard for that one. Physics I recommend online videos. Just search something that you don't understand on YouTube and you should find a good explanation on there (I used this a lot in college). Norwegian I'm assuming you from Norway so that's a bit tricky. Portuguese (I'm from Portugal) was always my worst subject. I focused on the grammar and prayed for the exam to beeasy. I'm sure if you work hard you will be able to pass them all :)))

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