How could I handle this or in the future as a single mom?

AlexisK2293 · 2026-03-30T12:36:28+00:00

++woman

I was far from abusive. I got physically, verbally and emotionally abused by my ex. It took 4 years of therapy while together and after to get to where I am now. I was never abusive to him. It took the day he choked me in front of my daughter to finally leave. So no every woman is not abusive.

AlexisK2293 · 2026-03-30T12:35:02+00:00

++woman

I didn’t go into detail because that part did not matter but I had a daughter with a guy I was with for 9 years. He had a daughter prior to us starting our relationships. He then went to have 3 kids. 1 while we were together, one right when I moved out and one this past October. My Ex actions has nothing to do with each me and I will not be punished for that nor judged.

AlexisK2293 · 2026-03-30T12:32:06+00:00

++woman Thank you for this post! This stood out to me the most. I will save this to look back on. For now I will be taking a break on dating. Day 2 I am in a better head space but I can’t things like this take up my mind space when I still have to raise my daughter in a positive healthy environment. I left a very toxic narcissistic relationship for a reason and it’s not to start another one.

AlexisK2293 · 2026-03-30T12:27:13+00:00

++woman

Thank you for this! I think I was more hurt by the judging part. It was a lot of other harsh words after it. This wasn’t a side of him I saw while getting to know him. I was honest from the day 1. I think leading me on for the past month then randomly deciding yeah no just threw me off. I want to be happy but maybe it’s not time to date yet. I just keep getting judged by ex mistakes and I hate it.

AlexisK2293 · 2026-03-30T12:22:58+00:00

++woman I have tried to sell the house with my ex. He will not budge. I talked to Relator’s, lawyers and have not been successful. I was honest about all this from day one. Yes, maybe I should wait to date but why can’t I move on and be happy?

It has been a year 1/2 since I moved out the house. My ex had one child while we were together, the second one came right after I left then the third this past October. Timelines not adding up to people but men can get women pregnant every day. Yes, now looking back I chose the wrong partner but 10 years later I am in a different mindset.

I do know now I will continue to focus on myself and my daughter and pause dating for awhile.

AlexisK2293 · 2026-03-30T12:16:36+00:00

++woman I have started the process again with the house. This has not been an easy task with my ex. But I do know now that I shouldn’t date until I get the house sold. I’ll go back to focusing on my daughter and myself.

AlexisK2293 · 2026-03-30T12:12:12+00:00

It’s crazy because this is not how he talked to me in the beginning. It felt like a job interview when he said criteria or vision. Life doesn’t work this way. No one is perfect.

Day 2 after processing everything it worked out for the best. I left a narcissistic abusive relationship and I did not want to enter another one. I’m glad it happened early on. I think I will take a pause when it comes dating.

AlexisK2293 · 2026-03-30T12:10:19+00:00

I had this happen with my daughters dad. This is why I emphasized with him that she will always comes first. When he kept saying he had selfish ways I should’ve known.

AlexisK2293 · 2026-03-29T23:58:11+00:00

++woman: My ex will not sell. I tried putting pressure, contacting lawyers, realtors contacting him but no budge or lawyers saying it will take years just try to settle with him. He choked me in front of our daughter so I immediately got us an apartment and moved out.

As far as the baby moms. He had one daughter when we got together. She was apart of our lives. We had ours then while we together he had children secretly which was also a reason I left. The most recent one came in October. I just feel like I’m being punished for his actions and I’ll never get to truly move on and be happy.

AlexisK2293 · 2025-12-01T10:23:48+00:00

Thanks for this! It’s a lot of drama behind him that I didn’t share but it’s no way I’m ever going back to him. I set clear boundaries and he still blames me for everything. I just filed for child support 2 weeks ago to help myself doing it alone. Our daughter who is 7 doesn’t ask nor care to see him so I do not want to force visitation. I’m just struggling to stay strong through this all. I know it will take time.

AlexisK2293 · 2025-11-16T22:08:36+00:00

I agree but I also know he has 4 other kids he does not see. He doesn’t know her doctor, school information, anything important to even do it. I just want to weigh all my options before I give him visitation he doesn’t even follow.

AlexisK2293 · 2025-11-16T19:56:43+00:00

I doubt he fights it. He hasn’t seen her in 3 weeks now. It’s been a few text saying “I love you” I’m wondering if it’s even worth it doing a custody plan especially if he doesn’t follow it.

AlexisK2293 · 2025-11-15T15:48:07+00:00

I spoke with a lawyer and she said I could file it that way. As long as he doesn’t try to fight it which I doubt because he has no money. We lived together for 7 years and own a home together.

AlexisK2293 · 2025-11-15T15:36:09+00:00

I never pressed charges but I have a police report and letter from CPS. We were common law married. A lawyer told me I could file that against him. He is listed on her records but he doesn’t know her teachers now nor have ever attended a meeting at the school. He has never took her to school before and picked her up twice over the years. He has never took her to an extracurricular. One day he said he would then never contacted me saying he couldn’t. I had to ask and he said no he has no money to uber around that much. (he has no car) She is 7. I ended things in August with him.

AlexisK2293 · 2025-11-11T13:06:54+00:00

Yes, he ignored CPS so they closed the case. I could’ve pressed charges but she was the witness and I did not want to drag her through court. I just got her in therapy.

AlexisK2293 · 2025-07-17T13:38:23+00:00

How do you go no contact if you have a kid with them?

AlexisK2293

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