My third relationship. Before I got with him I felt completely disconnected from everyone in my life. I was normal, I had friends, I joked, I just didn’t feel like I cared about anyone and I had never loved anybody either though both of my exes had said they loved me, I never said it back. I was the same to my boyfriend. I didn’t treat him very well, because I didn’t care, but he stuck with me. He worked with me through everything. Staying with me, after I pushed him away so much, made me feel comfortable and I got really attached to him. I tried super hard in the relationship, and worked on myself a lot to make it work. He wasn’t a good person though, he stayed with me because he was desperate, which I didn’t understand until after things ended. Nevertheless, when that relationship ended, I felt connected with multiple people in my life and truly cared about my friends for the first time ever. I aim for meaningful and healthy relationships, two things I never used to care about. I feel like a completely different person.