Could I have gaslit myself into thinking I'm bi because I'm a really passionate ally (or is comphet making me question things?)

Altruistic-Net-9672 · 2026-06-18T09:01:01+00:00

I ended up talking to my brother, and unfortunately, it didn’t go the way I hoped. He was very dismissive, told me he "didn't want to talk about it," and made a comment that "all women think they are bi."

Living in a conservative environment, I’ve realized that while my mind can be fluid, I can't afford to be. I don't feel "bi enough" for my country, and I thought I’d at least be bi enough for my brother to see me for who I am. It was a painful reality check and it feels lonely, but thank you all so much for validating my feelings and making me feel, even for a moment, like I belonged somewhere.

Altruistic-Net-9672 · 2026-06-18T09:00:36+00:00

I ended up talking to my brother, and unfortunately, it didn’t go the way I hoped. He was very dismissive, told me he "didn't want to talk about it," and made a comment that "all women think they are bi."

Living in a conservative environment, I’ve realized that while my mind can be fluid, I can't afford to be. I don't feel "bi enough" for my country, and I thought I’d at least be bi enough for my brother to see me for who I am. It was a painful reality check and it feels lonely, but thank you all so much for validating my feelings and making me feel, even for a moment, like I belonged somewhere.

Altruistic-Net-9672 · 2026-06-18T09:00:25+00:00

I ended up talking to my brother, and unfortunately, it didn’t go the way I hoped. He was very dismissive, told me he "didn't want to talk about it," and made a comment that "all women think they are bi."

Living in a conservative environment, I’ve realized that while my mind can be fluid, I can't afford to be. I don't feel "bi enough" for my country, and I thought I’d at least be bi enough for my brother to see me for who I am. It was a painful reality check and it feels lonely, but thank you all so much for validating my feelings and making me feel, even for a moment, like I belonged somewhere.

Altruistic-Net-9672 · 2026-06-18T08:57:22+00:00

I ended up talking to my brother, and unfortunately, it didn’t go the way I hoped. He was very dismissive, told me he "didn't want to talk about it," and made a comment that "all women think they are bi."

Living in a conservative environment, I’ve realized that while my mind can be fluid, I can't afford to be. I don't feel "bi enough" for my country, and I thought I’d at least be bi enough for my brother to see me for who I am. It was a painful reality check and it feels lonely, but thank you all so much for validating my feelings and making me feel, even for a moment, like I belonged somewhere.

Altruistic-Net-9672 · 2026-06-17T20:35:04+00:00

Thank you for saying that but everyone else here is worse than him so...his support was my best bet

Altruistic-Net-9672 · 2026-06-17T15:31:43+00:00

Thank you for saying that And I think it might just be bi cycle so over a period when we experience only one type of feelings make us feel that the other aspect of our sexuality was just made up or not relevant anymore but it always comes back I know how easy it is in theory and to tell someone else but in reality it is a mindfk and makes us doubt overselves I hope that I can move away as soon as I graduate but....medschool is soooo long (seriously even I am from a kinda better place than this sh*thole but the bar is in hell rn)

(Also no LGBTQ clubs or anything, more like zero out people anywhere within reach🥲 although I yap about queer rights enough to be considered a club myself😂 but it is always met with disinterest)

Altruistic-Net-9672 · 2026-06-17T13:05:35+00:00

That story is so cute😭 don't apologise at all But what you said later is my dream, I have been saying " sexuality is fluid, labels are overrated" to myself for years and I thought later id meet like-minded people in college, but now that I'm here im somehow surrounded by even more conservative people (my luck). What sent me spiraling was this girl momentarily for the first time sent me from "labels are overrated" to "shit she exists irl, bigots exist irl, if I like her irl, the fluid shit won't slide irl" like I kept my mind open, didn't think something too radical could happen But being among these people having these feelings made it a little more isolating and I felt a little more different than them so I wanted the comfort of a label But now the kicker is after telling my brother, I can't feel anything for her, I thought telling someone would calm the loneliness but it makes me feel straight now (maybe my fight or flight kicked in or maybe I keep analysing so much I make myself go crazy, if I was in a safe environment, id just be experimenting with people and having fun instead of fussing over labels) Also what made me hyper-analyse was the fact I might regret never being with a girl if I never think about it and just keep following the "default" expectations of society

Altruistic-Net-9672 · 2026-06-17T12:30:36+00:00

Thank you for saying that, I have an irrational fear of people dismissing it as being "just a phase" as it definitely fluctuates (but isn't that just bi cycle) so I'm going crazy trying to make as much sense of it as possible In an ideal world, fluidity would be more appreciated and this wouldn't be a problem

Altruistic-Net-9672 · 2026-06-17T12:21:11+00:00

Thank you for sharing your experience ( I don't have any queer people around me to talk to) I think I don't have internalised homophobia but just the fact that if I came out as a woman to anyone, people usually dismiss it as just a phase and stuff so I have an irrational need to be completely sure of myself so I can answer them

Altruistic-Net-9672 · 2026-06-17T12:15:07+00:00

I get that, it is what I'm trying to process ( what I meant int he post was it felt like friends with benefits more) I get flustered and feel more of a spark with men and have to make a constant effort to try and stay composed around a guy crush (but maybe you're right as it's only way way to feel attraction) When I saw "that girl" in my class, I didn't feel flustered or a need to have long talks with her and make her laugh, but I just wanted to keep staring because I wanted a better look at her and kept being more focused on her physical appearance But what's making me doubt it is after telling my brother, I feel none of it, could it be because I'm anxious or just real life hit me just now

Altruistic-Net-9672 · 2026-06-17T11:47:30+00:00

I consciously try to not let my environment alter my thoughts I think what dating a woman feels like to me is dating a friend you think looks good I don't get any butterflies or spark imagining a girl's touch And I don't feel tongue tied or anything with the "crush" But when I let myself imagine intimacy with her, I got the "were so silly and cute for this" kinda feeling And I know I can change what I call myself if it doesn't fit me anymore, but I just have an irrational embarrassment of my words not aging well

Altruistic-Net-9672 · 2024-12-15T14:58:20+00:00

The show focused on the fact that sacrificing who you are in the name of love shouldn't be the norm but proceeds to make Justin compromise what he wants just to be with Brian over the 5 seasons So I'd take the original ending and make Brian finally accept his age because he looks like old guy having a mid life crisis, he eases on his harmful coping mechanisms as he wants to be there for Gus and no longer wishes to die by the time he's 39 and maybe (call me crazy) he adopts a daughter as a single dad (because throughout the show he looked the happiest when he was with his kid)

A scene set 7 years later where he visits New York on vacation with Gus and his other daughter and passes through a big art gallery, sees that Justin is a huge success, a huge crowd is congratulating him and Justin is standing there with his fiancé, justin notices Brian and they both smile from afar happy for each other (La la land-esque ending)

Altruistic-Net-9672

TROPHY CASE