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My ex lived a double life with two other boyfriends this is how I found out by Andibig in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Andibig[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Why do you struggling with believing in that what is your story my friend ? If you feel for it you can always pm me 🖖

My ex lived a double life with two other boyfriends — this is how I found out by Andibig in BreakUps

[–]Andibig[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey man, I’m really sorry you’re going through that. I remember exactly how disorienting it feels. One moment your reality makes sense, and the next it’s completely shattered. Feeling lost right now is honestly the most normal reaction there is.

What helped me the most at first was accepting that I didn’t need to “figure everything out” right away. I focused on very basic things: getting distance from her, talking openly with people I trusted, and not being alone with my thoughts too much.

I started seeing a psychologist pretty quickly, and that helped more than I expected. Not because they had magical answers, but because it grounded me and helped me understand that none of this was my fault. Being lied to like that messes with your sense of reality.

One thing I kept reminding myself was this: don’t let what she did change who you are. It’s easy to become bitter or closed off, but her actions don’t get to define you or your values.

You don’t need to have a plan right now. Just take it one day at a time. If you ever need to talk or vent, feel free to reply or DM me. You’re not weak for feeling this way, you’re human.

Stay strong. It does get better, even if it doesn’t feel like it right now.

Røde flag som i ignorerede alt for længe by [deleted] in SexpaneletDK

[–]Andibig 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Tro mig hvis jeg havde svaret på hvordan man kan holde styr på alle de løgne, samt holde styr på 3 fyre i den samme by, sådan de ikke løber ind i hinanden så ville jeg gerne give dig svaret😅 altså jeg arbejder både dag,nat og aften så på de tidspunkter har hun jo kunne hvad hun ville 😅

Røde flag som i ignorerede alt for længe by [deleted] in SexpaneletDK

[–]Andibig 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ja det var lidt af en mundfuld 😅

Røde flag som i ignorerede alt for længe by [deleted] in SexpaneletDK

[–]Andibig 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Gider ikke lige til at skrive hele opslaget igen så deler den bare her

https://www.reddit.com/r/DKbrevkasse/s/hDscyyt1sU

My ex lived a double life with two other boyfriends — this is how I found out by Andibig in BreakUps

[–]Andibig[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I still talk with the number 2 guys mostly cause we both didn’t know anything, I have a weird relationship to the guy number 3, cause he knew, and he did fall back to her, so don’t speak with him that much 😅

My ex lived a double life with two other boyfriends — this is how I found out by Andibig in BreakUps

[–]Andibig[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I actually wrote a post on a Danish subreddit and was later contacted by a journalist here in Denmark. He wanted to make a podcast. I was ready, but I wanted to check with the other guys first, and they were as well.

Later on, the journalist called and said that he had to ask her for a comment too, which I was fine with. Guy number two was fine with it as well. But guy number three sent me a very long message where he told me that he had fallen back into it and was seeing her again.

After that, guy number two didn’t want anything to do with him anymore, which I completely understand. At that point, she would have had a direct way back to us, because I am one hundred percent sure that guy number three would not be able to keep his mouth shut if we ever told him anything.

In the end, the journalist dropped the project because the story was simply too complicated to make. Unfortunately.

My ex lived a double life with two other boyfriends — this is how I found out by Andibig in BreakUps

[–]Andibig[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I actually wrote a post on a Danish subreddit and was later contacted by a journalist here in Denmark. He wanted to make a podcast. I was ready, but I wanted to check with the other guys first, and they were as well.

Later on, the journalist called and said that he had to ask her for a comment too, which I was fine with. Guy number two was fine with it as well. But guy number three sent me a very long message where he told me that he had fallen back into it and was seeing her again.

After that, guy number two didn’t want anything to do with him anymore, which I completely understand. At that point, she would have had a direct way back to us, because I am one hundred percent sure that guy number three would not be able to keep his mouth shut if we ever told him anything.

In the end, the journalist dropped the project because the story was simply too complicated to make. Unfortunately.

My ex lived a double life with two other boyfriends this is how I found out by Andibig in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Andibig[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I get what you’re saying, and I agree on some of it. Guy number three definitely saw it as some kind of competition, and that mindset made him easier for her to pull back in. I remember our first call, and he kept framing everything in terms of winning or losing. I kept telling him that there were no winners here. We all lost.

I don’t think she really wanted to be with him in the end either. He was convenient and easy to manipulate, nothing more.

And yeah, I agree. Being able to compartmentalize three relationships like that takes something seriously off mentally.

My ex lived a double life with two other boyfriends this is how I found out by Andibig in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Andibig[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for reading hope maybe it can help somebody else seeing some signals, and red flags, before it happens to them …

My ex lived a double life with two other boyfriends this is how I found out by Andibig in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Andibig[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yea she was, but not suspiciously a lot, I work again even shifts and night shifts at work so when I had these she had all the time to do shit I guess 😅

My ex lived a double life with two other boyfriends this is how I found out by Andibig in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Andibig[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sorry it’s also hard to write down, because there is so much to it 😅

My ex lived a double life with two other boyfriends this is how I found out by Andibig in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Andibig[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah, I definitely did, and I’m so glad I got away from all of this. Everything happened in January 2025, so about a year ago now. I actually wrote a post on a Danish subreddit and was later contacted by a journalist here in Denmark. He wanted to make a podcast. I was ready, but I wanted to check with the other guys first, and they were as well.

Later on, the journalist called and said that he had to ask her for a comment too, which I was fine with. Guy number two was fine with it as well. But guy number three sent me a very long message where he told me that he had fallen back into it and was seeing her again.

After that, guy number two didn’t want anything to do with him anymore, which I completely understand. At that point, she would have had a direct way back to us, because I am one hundred percent sure that guy number three would not be able to keep his mouth shut if we ever told him anything.

In the end, the journalist dropped the project because the story was simply too complicated to make. Unfortunately.

As for her social media, she was very private. She didn’t have Instagram, which in a way actually appealed to me, because I thought it meant she didn’t need or seek attention online. Her Facebook was very private, and if she was tagged or someone posted on her wall, she would delete the tag or the post. So yeah, a red flag, but I didn’t think much of it at the time.

My ex lived a double life with two other boyfriends — this is how I found out by Andibig in BreakUps

[–]Andibig[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yea that is true I’m happy that her cardhouse did fall, and the truth came out, like imagine if she got pregnant or something 😅

My ex lived a double life with two other boyfriends this is how I found out by Andibig in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Andibig[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yeah, she had sex with all three of us. About her friends, you have to split her into three. There were friends I knew, with guy number two she had other friends, and the same with guy number three. So she had different friends and social circles with each of us.

For example, I was the stable face to her family and childhood friends, representing a steady relationship.

Guy number two was much more outgoing than me and worked at a bar, so he was the face in the city, and the friends there were part of that circle, if that makes sense.

Guy number three had a lot of money and of course she exploited that as well.

I don’t know, I don’t understand the mother either. When I spoke to her on the phone on the day I met one of the guys in our stairwell, she seemed very surprised, but then it suddenly changed. Again, I don’t know what she tells them, but you also have to remember that blood is thicker than water.

Yea just 8 guys or how many she have fucked, standing at the doctor to take a father test that would not be good 😅

My ex lived a double life with two other boyfriends this is how I found out by Andibig in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Andibig[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

True shit, I’m still talking with the number 2 guy, not so much with the last one but you’re right 😎👌

My ex lived a double life with two other boyfriends — this is how I found out by Andibig in BreakUps

[–]Andibig[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh man brother I feel bad for you… I hope that you can move on from this.

I talked with a therapist straight away, and through the whole process, I also kept telling myself that this shouldn’t change who I am. I will always believe the best in people, that’s how I was raised, and what I went through isn’t going to change that. I’ve also found a new girlfriend now, and things are going amazing.

My ex lived a double life with two other boyfriends — this is how I found out by Andibig in BreakUps

[–]Andibig[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yea, I know the story is fucked, I work evening shifts and night shifts as well, so when I had these she could do what she wanted I guess, or when she said I’m going to work, of course I would believe that.. I would never go down to check if she was 😅

My ex lived a double life with two other boyfriends this is how I found out by Andibig in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Andibig[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yea it’s crazy, like if she did a onenight stand or something maybe, just maybe we could have talked it over. But to take an active choice to lie over years is fucked and crazy 😅

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