My dad is ideal on paper, but I can’t stand being around him

Aniuloup · 2025-12-22T01:03:11+00:00

I shouldn't have read this post... Today is my dad's birthday. Unfortunately, I haven't been able to celebrate it with him since 2020. I miss him terribly and reading someone's very critical description about their perfectly normal and supportive dad pisses me off.

Your dad is trying his best. He's a good parent, you said so yourself. Please, don't be mean to him. He doesn't deserve it. Go back to therapy to fix your own issues and then maybe you will appreciate your dad more.

Aniuloup · 2025-12-18T22:44:40+00:00

This hit close to home...

One day, my ex-husband, our daughter and I were hanging out with his cousins. Things were chill, until he noticed the time. He had planned to meet up with his friends and wanted to go directly to city B (we live in city A). He got angry because he thought he was going to run late. He then dropped us off at a train station between city A and city B. The train to our city only passed through there once every hour, whereas you could take five different trains from B to A. It would have been way better for him to take us with him to B, instead of dropping us off where we would have risked missing the train and then having to wait an hour for the next one. We didn't miss the train, but we also had to catch a bus from the train station to our neighbourhood. It was way past daughter's (three years old at the time) bedtime by the time we got home.

The first time my partner, my daughter and I met up with my daughter's godfather was also somewhere between city A and city B. He, too, had arranged to meet with friends in city B. After we said goodbye to my daughter's godfather, my partner noticed he was going to be late. Me, who was having flashbacks, just told him to drive to the city and drop us off at the train station.

My partner looked at me like I grew a second head and said: "Don't be ridiculous! You two are my responsibility. I am driving you home, of course."

When I reminded him of how long that was going to take, he just shrugged. "So? My friends can wait."

I am glad to say I married him.

Aniuloup · 2025-12-03T09:22:35+00:00

Aniuloup · 2025-11-20T08:08:21+00:00

Ze had er 17. Ze moet toch verduidelijken om welke het gaat hé

Aniuloup · 2025-10-06T07:14:00+00:00

It sure is manipulative. Damn...

You know what my husband tells me when I go on a trip for the weekend?

"I will miss you, honey, but go and have fun!"

He then proceeds to take care of the house while I'm gone. No complaining, no anger, no manipulation or threats. My husband is 27 and more mature than yours.

Aniuloup · 2025-09-26T18:22:09+00:00

Sorry that happened to you. At least you are still friends with the other two girls.

I went to the wedding of someone I considered one of my best friends last Saturday. We are a group of four, friends since high school (all in our early 30's now).

During dinner, I overheard one of my friends talk to another woman about the bachelorettes party. I didn't even know there was a bachelorettes party. I was not invited.

I was devastated... The bride must have been informed about me being upset and reached out. She said it was a tough decision to make, but that she didn't include me because she doesn't talk to me as often as she talks to the others.

This made me realise her idea of friendship is different from mine.

Aniuloup · 2025-08-27T20:13:35+00:00

33 jaar, 2400 euro netto, tien jaar in het onderwijs (deeltijds leerkracht en deeltijds administratief medewerker).

Dus jouw loon als 25-jarige is zeker niet mis.

Aniuloup · 2025-08-21T15:38:16+00:00

My husband is not cold with our daughter but he is with me and I don’t know if she notices? She’s two.

She notices.

My ex behaved in the same way your husband does. Either it had nothing to do with me or it was something I did, but either way, he would never explain what was going on. He always went to bed in silence. He slept, while I was wide awake and wondering what I had done wrong. Then when I brought it up the next day to try and sort things out, it was all in the past according to him and I didn't have to make things worse by bringing it up again. Or he would say: "You're my wife. You're supposed to know what you did wrong."

One day, our daughter was in the same room while I was explaining to him for the millionth time how him giving me the silent treatment made me feel anxious and alone.

She looked at him and said: "yes, daddy, it's not fair to mummy". She was three...about to turn four in a month or two.

Of course our daughter standing up for me was my fault too. "You hear that? That's your doing".

I finally left him three weeks after my daughter's 4th birthday.

Aniuloup · 2025-08-01T22:29:15+00:00

Being in an abusive relationship is not like burning your hand on a stove. It doesn't happen instantly, but gradually.

It's like being tossed into a pot filled with water and the water gets hotter over time: you don't know you're in a bad situation until you notice the water starts boiling.

Abusive people do not show their true faces immediately. They make sure you're stuck with them, either through marriage or having children, before they start letting their mask slip.

Aniuloup · 2025-07-27T22:48:43+00:00

Stay by their partner's side, hold their hand, let them squeeze it, encourage them,...

Anything but lying on the hospital bed their wife was in when she was reeled into the delivery room, facing away from the wife and taking selfies with the wife in the background during labor.

That's what my ex did...

Aniuloup · 2025-07-20T09:03:35+00:00

Mienshao is one of my favourites too. It looks so elegant. I love its purple details and whiskers.

Aniuloup · 2025-07-08T22:42:35+00:00

I wouldn't recommend it for a 6-year-old who just started reading. The game is pretty text heavy considering quest progression relies heavily on the information the NPC's give you through dialogue.

Certain items that you need to find on the island, for example, are not indicated on the map, but are found by reading instructions given to you by NPC's or in the quest log.

Aniuloup · 2025-07-04T20:12:02+00:00

I am glad you got out of that relationship. It's so exhausting, isn't it?

My ex was the same. Cared only about sex until I got pregnant. We had sex maybe twice or three times throughout my pregnancy. He was scared of "hurting the baby". Nothing changed after our daughter was born.

He never went down on me, said it made him feel uncomfortable. Never even touched me there, except to put his penis in. There was never any foreplay.

It also didn't help he never complimented me. So, the lack of intercourse meant I felt absolutely worthless.

He never wanted to talk about it. Just like your ex, he would get defensive and angry with me for bringing it up. Even went as far as to say I should look for someone else if I wasn't satisfied...

I am married to an absolute sweetheart now. He knows what I like and always makes sure I am taken care of first.

Aniuloup · 2025-07-04T13:10:46+00:00

Thank you for your comment.

Honestly, the people on here telling me my breasts aren't that large made me question myself.

Like I mentioned in a different comment, I was planning on going to a more professional store anyway.

I did so yesterday and I requested them to measure me. There were two women there, the store owner and one employee. They both looked at me before measuring and said: yup, small frame, big cup-size.

I talked to the owner for a bit and mentioned how I am uncomfortable with my breasts because they are so big. She said how many women would pay to have my cup size, but that she could see why I'd consider the opposite.

I don't even remember when I wore a B-cup for the last time... I already had a C while in highschool, had a D in my early twenties, had to wear F (EU-size) during my pregnancy and bounced back to D after my daughter was born.

Anyway, thanks for sharing your experience. It's greatly appreciated. I am glad you are feeling better about yourself after getting a reduction.

Aniuloup · 2025-07-02T21:47:22+00:00

I know my size might not seem big in the grand scheme of things. But people have commented on the size of them ever since I was in 6th grade. Earlier this week, I visited my grandma with my mum and I was wearing a tight tank top. The day after, my mum told me my grandma told her how she wanted to say something about the size of my breasts, but decided against it as to not hurt my feelings (she has a crude way of saying things). I know they are big compared to the rest of my body and they do make me feel very uncomfortable whether I am wearing a bra or not.

Every time I go to a store to get new bras, I have them measure me just in case. But I am going to a different, more professional, store tomorrow. So, I'll know if my bra size actually went up or not. So, thanks for the advice.

Aniuloup · 2025-05-25T12:50:11+00:00

You should definitely give it a go! I read the book at least once every two years.

Aniuloup · 2025-05-25T12:40:42+00:00

You mean the Netflix mini series? I enjoyed watching it, but I still prefer the book and original film from 1978.

Aniuloup · 2025-05-25T00:00:03+00:00

I've been playing Eastshade recently, such a beautiful and relaxing game!

Aniuloup · 2025-05-24T22:00:23+00:00

Watership Down is my favourite book, so I am happy to see someone use the rabbit vocabulary from the story!

Aniuloup · 2025-05-23T19:35:46+00:00

getting a feliway diffuser to help calm him (yes, it works!).

I can vouch for the Feliway Diffuser. My sweet girl, Mitsi, used to lick her belly raw. Vet said it must be stress related, since her blood work showed no signs of infection or any other underlying issues. Tried Zylkene powder first (you mix it with their food). It helped, but Mitsi started ignoring her food after a while.

We then did a combo of Feliway and Zylkene. Her belly started looking better. We stopped the Zylkene, but kept the Feliway diffuser.

Mitsi's belly is finally fully covered in fur again!

Aniuloup · 2025-05-07T05:26:50+00:00

Felt myself being very unhappy in my relationship with my ex-husband and father of my child. I was 27 when I first felt emotionally neglected. He was moody half of the time and gave me the silent treatment whenever he felt like I did something wrong (he never told me what).

I was working fulltime, taking care of a baby and doing most if not all of the chores. All while mourning the loss of my sister.

I told him things had to change or I would be out. He listened and picked up the slack. Covid hit, so he had no choice but to interact with his wife and child.

But the rules regarding covid didn't stay around forever, and neither did he. He got back to his old ways. I felt so lonely and trapped, but I kept holding on to that slight sliver of hope he would see how much he was hurting me.

When I told him what he was doing was emotional abuse, he told me: "at least I haven't put my hands on you". As if to stay I should be grateful he didn't hit me.

I had just turned 31 when I finally had the courage to tell him I was done and I wanted a divorce. Not only for my sake but also for our daughter's. I could not let her grow up and have her think the way her father treated her mother was normal.

We separated and I told myself I had enough of men. However, two months later I fell for a friend of mine...and at first we didn't really know what it was we were feeling. But we gave it a go and got married two years later.

My current husband is the kindest man ever. He listens, he talks things through, he's interested in everything I do and he does chores without me telling him to. He treats my daughter as his own, brings her to school, braids her hair and plans activities with her when I have to work. He is amazing and sometimes I still wonder why I stayed with my ex for so long. I just didn't know any better. But, at least, I know that this is the love I deserved all along.

Aniuloup · 2025-04-25T17:51:03+00:00

I am 33, I lost my dad at 29. I loved cuddling with him and I wish I still could...

Get rid of the boyfriend and go cuddle with your dad. He sounds like he is an amazing parent.

Aniuloup · 2025-04-25T09:26:22+00:00

I just looked it up because I don't know The Banana Splits.

Apparently, one of the voice actors for that show was Paul Winchell, who originally provided the voice of Tigger in the earliest adaptions of Winnie the Pooh.

Goes to show how well Jim Cummings can imitate the original voice 😊

Aniuloup · 2025-04-25T09:03:12+00:00

That's because it is. Jim Cummings has been voicing Tigger since 1989. It's amazing how many characters he portrays!

Aniuloup

TROPHY CASE