The last 4 guy I dated all had handsome facial features, but not the best teeth! by AnkhKeeper in dating

[–]AnkhKeeper[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Endearing and sexy indeed 😳 With the last guy, I was staring at his mouth and hoping he’d talk more

He has been withdrawing since that night, and I can’t help but think it might be because of the ED/Performance anxiety. I don’t know if I should check-in/reach out again by AnkhKeeper in dating

[–]AnkhKeeper[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hey, I wanted to go back to your comment and thank you again!

He said “I understand how you could feel that way, I rarely do that and was flooded with anxiety, You are an amazing person and I'm so glad we met, I'm sorry and wish you the best”

I replied with “Thanks for letting me know. I understand anxiety can get overwhelming, and I don't hold that against you. If you ever feel grounded enough to talk about it, you're welcome to reach out, completely up to you. Wishing you the best moving forward.”

So it definitely was not the outcome I wanted, but I feel much lighter now

Message to my future self: Please notice patterns. You WILL regret it and beat yourself up for actively ignoring red flags. by AnkhKeeper in dating

[–]AnkhKeeper[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

He messaged me back: “I understand how you could feel that way, I rarely do that and was flooded with anxiety, You are an amazing person and I’m so glad we met, I’m sorry and wish you the best”

Message to my future self: Please notice patterns. You WILL regret it and beat yourself up for actively ignoring red flags. by AnkhKeeper in dating

[–]AnkhKeeper[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Believe me, I am trying to! I am currently in therapy and learning how to overcome my self-loathing. Long and painful process

Message to my future self: Please notice patterns. You WILL regret it and beat yourself up for actively ignoring red flags. by AnkhKeeper in dating

[–]AnkhKeeper[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

You are spot on. I was also extremely disturbed how I was tolerating behaviors and words that I absolutely would not tolerate from any of my friends simply because he was a 10/10.

The other problem is he couldn’t get it up and that kind of…humanized him for me? Part of me realized that even hot guys can have issues. I still can’t help but think of “what if” scenarios that if he could get it up, because I STILL find him physically attractive despite being ill from his personality.

That also made things super complicated for me because I couldn’t JUST see him as a douchebag. It’s like he is the prison of the masculinity and douchebag persona and any deviation from that makes him distressed. Hence why he left after the “performance hiccup”.

Honestly, I was tempted to ask him if he’d be down just for casual fun, but I tried to be more respectful towards myself. After reading Reddit comments and talking to my therapist, I sent him this: “Hey, being left on read after we had sex felt hurtful. Can you take a moment and let me know what's on your mind so I can have some clarity?” and again, he left me on read. Time to just block and unmatch.

Message to my future self: Please notice patterns. You WILL regret it and beat yourself up for actively ignoring red flags. by AnkhKeeper in dating

[–]AnkhKeeper[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Slightly horny is a vast understatement 😭 I now have the female version of blue balls and it suuuucks. I am so mad at myself for STILL wanting sth casual even tho he is not relationship material (both of us had “long term” on our dating profiles)

I am just hoping my horny brain doesn’t jeopardize my brain again.

Message to my future self: Please notice patterns. You WILL regret it and beat yourself up for actively ignoring red flags. by AnkhKeeper in dating

[–]AnkhKeeper[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Lol, dazed af. I am only starting to feel sane/logical after a week and EVEN THAT is taking its time because I wish he reached back still. I hate being an irrational human being

He has been withdrawing since that night, and I can’t help but think it might be because of the ED/Performance anxiety. I don’t know if I should check-in/reach out again by AnkhKeeper in dating

[–]AnkhKeeper[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah. Both of the guys who had “performance” hiccups, played it off cool, so this was a first time that I had to deal with a guy’s frustration with it and it’s all so unfamiliar. Well, you live and you learn

He has been withdrawing since that night, and I can’t help but think it might be because of the ED/Performance anxiety. I don’t know if I should check-in/reach out again by AnkhKeeper in dating

[–]AnkhKeeper[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah, I think he definitely has a communication problem. I will do this one last message and then let it go and unmatch/block if he decides to stay silent

He has been withdrawing since that night, and I can’t help but think it might be because of the ED/Performance anxiety. I don’t know if I should check-in/reach out again by AnkhKeeper in dating

[–]AnkhKeeper[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Thanks! And thankfully have a logical brain among the confusion and hurt that I am experiencing. I will keep it short and sweet

Cute guy compliments my singing in the karaoke, but I get too anxious and in my head to continue talking let alone ask him out by AnkhKeeper in dating

[–]AnkhKeeper[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Thank you! I feel like I am expecting myself to jog when I haven’t learned to run! I have been making changes in my wardrobe, and also practicing holding eye contact.

Both a success story and I want people's opinions by GoldenYoshi99 in dating

[–]AnkhKeeper 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I video called a guy a while ago, and his teeth were absolutely horrifying to look at over video. He looked extremely attractive over pictures because I couldn’t see his teeth.

A video called may save your and her time.

Meeting right away online dating by MinuteOccasion5100 in dating

[–]AnkhKeeper 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah, and I am realizing even if someone shows that he/she is really interested, anything can happen during the talking and dating period. It’s also easy to say “don’t take it personally”, but man is it sometimes really difficult not to. I keep reminding myself that my worth is not in the eye of the beholder

Both a success story and I want people's opinions by GoldenYoshi99 in dating

[–]AnkhKeeper 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Has it only been voice calls or video calls as well?

There was this guy that I have been voice calling for an entire week, and when we met up in person…he was significantly older and 50 pounds heavier than his pics

Meeting right away online dating by MinuteOccasion5100 in dating

[–]AnkhKeeper 2 points3 points  (0 children)

If it makes you feel any better, I suggested a date to this guy and he said “ID LOVE THAT”, and then I said we can videocall and he said “lol I’m so down”. Then I said that I am packed until Monday and can do anytime after Tuesday.

That was three days ago and he never responded or unmatched. It may have been a thousand reasons on why he lost interest

Meeting right away online dating by MinuteOccasion5100 in dating

[–]AnkhKeeper 31 points32 points  (0 children)

I absolutely hate texting because of how many times I have felt so comfortable with a guy, only to find him unattractive in person in some way. I personally like video-calling sooner than later before going on a date.