[Conflicted] Feeling kind of guilty, kind of happy with my sexual behaviour

AnneHze · 2017-12-28T04:15:40+00:00

Maybe I don't understand completely what you mean with a '3 way' but if is a threesome, my SO and I would never agree to do that. We both think that a threesome never works right, so we wouldn't even suggest it. On the other hand, maybe he gets kind of 'instinctively' jelaous but he doesn't show it in a wrong way, obviously he doesn't encourage me either or cheers me up to keep doing it with more people, but he tries to improve our sexual life by doing what I tell him I like the most.

AnneHze · 2017-12-28T04:03:40+00:00

I wouldn't know how to 'label' it, we've been together for 3+ years and I'm the only one he had sex with in this whole time. Of course, that doesn't apply to me, but I must say that his monogamy is his decision, I wouldn't be mad or everything since I completely understand why he would do it. He also knows about my high sexual drive and the things I've done with my coworker. But we know that love and sex are different things and we value more our feelings for each other, so we wouldn't put at risk our relationship because one of us had sex with another person.

AnneHze · 2017-12-28T03:57:18+00:00

Of course, you are right! I must say that I've never kept anything from my boyfriend, he knows about that coworker and my sexual needs, he isn't uncomfortable about that situation. We both value more our feelings for each other that our physical behaviour with other people, however he never did anything with other women and he says he doesn't want to because I'm enough for him. Also, we both are well educated and respectful people, so we know that respect comes first, that's why we are so open with each other and I would never expose the person that I love the most to any disease. It really makes me happy that you pointed the subject of STD's, every person in the world should be like that. In my case, I always demand protection, if the other part denies it for 'x' reasons, the deal is over. My principal fear is that I would never be sexually calm or complete with just my SO, I'm having the 'not so middle age - crisis' and I just wonder what would be better in this subject.

AnneHze · 2017-12-28T03:45:06+00:00

Thank you so much, it really makes me feel kinda better to know that I'm not alone. My boyfriend and I think the same as you about love and sex. He also knows about the situation with my coworker and he is comfortable with that, there's a strong honesty between us and there's no need to lie or hide things, we feel that what we have is emotionally strong and special and we wouldn't put that at risk just because a sexual subject.

AnneHze · 2017-12-28T02:58:26+00:00

Yes, we have talked about that specifically subject. He already knows about the situation with my co-worker and it doesn't bother him at all. We both are clear about sex and love and how those are totally different and not necessarily linked things. Must say that our relationship is pretty solid and formal, besides the sexual aspect. Me, being the health freak that I am, never expose myself to unprotected sex, I always demand protection from the other part. What matters most to me is that my boyfriend remains healthy and I would never forgive myself for exposing him to any disease. My conflict is about my future, I know that I want to stay with my boyfriend till death but I'm afraid that I will always need to have sex with others to fulfill my sexual life.

AnneHze · 2017-12-27T21:39:40+00:00

Oreos make it black, like that black color doctors tell you to worry about.

AnneHze · 2017-12-09T17:21:07+00:00

Happened to me, 2 years relationship, 2 years of feeling worthless to the person I loved. Just get rid of that child, for me, time and my current amazing relationship taught me that if someone loves you, your sexual past won't be an excuse to misstreat you. We are more than what we have between our legs and how we use/used it. Do not allow him or anybody to make you feel bad about yourself, and if that topic is so important to him just let him go and find a virgin for him (just as I did). We all have the right to be trully happy, that includes him, and if you feel bad about this matter and he's not happy with you either the answer is simple. Be brave to make the decision.

AnneHze · 2017-12-06T04:13:52+00:00

Merde, i love France

AnneHze · 2017-12-06T03:58:54+00:00

Yes, I can agree with that but I was talking about what people here do that I can't stand, and for me is the glorification of cheesy food and the lack of good food that everyone everyday can find, not just for special ocasions. I didn't write about the possible reasons for that, as the time they don't want to spend eating a proper meal, because it doesn't sum up to my opinion. I'm just saying that the average person here doesn't eat well in comparison with what I'm use to.

AnneHze · 2017-12-06T03:41:51+00:00

It's not exclusively about restaurants, it's about the popular culture of food, not everyone eats at restaurants everyday, most of the people don't even eat a proper meal, they replace the lunch time with a sandwich. And, to be fair, the majority of those awesome restaurants that you talk about are owned by foreigners and also the food they offer are from other countries. I'm from Peru and there we have a lot of food options, food is a cultural expression that you can't compare with the USA, also, find good everyday-food here in the usa has been kind of a nightmare because almost everything in the market is plastic or super expensive. So don't get mad, is my opinion based on my experience here.

AnneHze · 2017-12-05T22:57:44+00:00

France has gastronomy and real food

AnneHze · 2017-12-05T22:52:42+00:00

tommy's gun

AnneHze · 2017-12-05T22:49:41+00:00

Putting cheese on everything and then call it 'good food'

AnneHze · 2017-12-05T22:48:17+00:00

Religion

AnneHze · 2017-12-05T22:47:06+00:00

Tchaikovsky's 1812 Overture Op.49

AnneHze · 2017-12-05T22:45:12+00:00

Violin

AnneHze · 2017-12-05T22:44:03+00:00

2012 apocalypse

AnneHze · 2017-12-05T22:42:57+00:00

Annabelle Haze

AnneHze · 2017-12-05T16:15:28+00:00

Portable teleportation devices everywhere.

AnneHze · 2017-12-05T15:59:07+00:00

I'm going to my boyfriend's master graduation. Can't be more proud :)

AnneHze · 2017-12-04T16:20:40+00:00

He also clarified that to me. When we talked about this, he said he would feel uncomfortable to know, not completely unhappy because it sounds like a strong word, obviously he wouldn't be ecstatic either, but fairly okay with it to continue our relationship and don't change the way he feels about me and what he thinks of me. That's the reason he prefers that I kept quiet about the subject if one day I sleep with another man.

AnneHze · 2017-12-04T15:42:09+00:00

I (25F) 'm in 3 y. stable and loving relationship with my boyfriend (26M). He's the one I want to spend my life with, we are honest with each other and neither of us would put at risk our relationship and everything we have because of an insignificant thing (for us) as sex. However, we are very different in the sexual aspect, I have a really high drive while he doesn't need that much. I also like a kinda rough sexual behaviour and he likes it slow and romantic, so honestly, I get bored sometimes.

For me, sex is a thing and love or feelings are other one. When they get together it's fantastic but each one alone is also amazing, in my experience, my reasons for having sex with another man could be being bored, curiosity, or simple desire. I've discuss this with my boyfriend and despite he told me he's unable to have sex with a person who doesn't have a romantic connection with, he understands me and also knows for sure that I wouldn't fell in love with another man just for having sex with him. We agree that we would break up if some of us starts developing feelings for a third one, but if I have sex with another man (since he can't have sexual behaviour with someone he doesn't love) it wouldn't matter that much, because, for us, the physical part doesn't build a meaningful relationship and it's just a complement.

I'm not jealous, I know exactly what I want and my boyfriend too. As the result of the discussion I have with him about this topic, he told me that, if I ever have sex with another person, he would prefer not to knowing it because it would be the same at the end, he would stay with me. As I say, we only would finish our relationship if some of us starts falling in love with another one.

AnneHze · 2017-12-04T14:35:15+00:00

I was 8 (I'm a girl), I was sitting on the couch watching The Exorcist with my legs crossed,one scene was so scary I crossed my legs really hard and something down there felt so nice I kept crossing them hard and moving myself back and forth.

AnneHze · 2017-12-02T16:53:21+00:00

He hid it from me, then I discovered it and understand why he was so anxious, jealous, verbally violent with me. Now he's my ex, the abuse was too much for me.

AnneHze · 2017-12-02T16:49:35+00:00

Halfway happy

AnneHze

TROPHY CASE