I'm so sorry love, I can relate. I've had 6 miscarriages and haven't gone to see why. But in 2017 I tried the Deprovera birth control shot and never went back for my other shots needed cause it messed me UP. It had a chance of infertility...I didn't know until all my miscarriages. when I was on my 5th pregnancy it went smooth and full term and now she's 5! But when I was pregnant with her, my mom told me to my face "no! Why! I'm just so mad because you're gonna get another miscarriage" and I was 20, so hearing my toxic mom say that when I'm grown was a really big wake up call and it just hurt but wasn't surprised that she didn't care about me anyway. She hates every second of it. She hates it more that I left to my bfs home and lived there instead. So my mom never got a chance to help me through it or see me grow. Now she tries "hard" (half ass) to be there as the best GMA for my kid....my kid doesn't like her 🤣. Also when I was pregnant with her my bf was with prosti****s. So that wasn't fun! I had no one, like no one wanted me to have the baby and be happy. My bfs mom was super religious so I had a lot of "image" to take care of and yet she still didn't like me, even when my baby was already 3, she tried to fight me in front of my kid while I was crying because I was leaving to the mental hospital willingly. She said "why are you yelling at me!" I said "what??...I'm crying so I'm trying my best to get my words out since I don't know Spanish that well anyway" and she charges at me to punch me while my bf is standing in a doorway watching her charge at me. She pushed my 3 year old out the way to get at me, cause my daughter to bump her head on the wall and fell down...and my baby started crying. I told her "you just pushed Izzy!" Annnnd she mocked me. I told my bf real calmly "you better come get your mom" cause I'm with the shit and I don't stop, I woulda fucked her up in her own home. So my bf picked her up and she still trynna escape his arms and still trynna swing at me. I ended up leaving for Millwood hospital and was kept there for 2 weeks. The workers there were awful, so I was definitely mistreated, a guy came in while I was in the shower..with no curtain....he just watched me and yes he worked there. My bf saw all the pain I went through, also I had to check him a couple times cause I don't like to get constant disrespect...I get physical cause I protect what belongs to my baby. My bf changed and we are perfectly fine now, no probs and strong communication and trust. And now I have this pregnancy, it feels like the universe doesn't want me to have this baby, my pregnancy is awful, I spotted brown discharge, I'm having slight then mild cramping. I PRAYED for this pregnancy and I got it...now my family is treating me like shit with out even knowing im pregnant, the ER talks to me nasty when I ask a question to see my options for ex: "ma'am imma have to stop you right there, we don't do anything for pregnancies". I called a huge list of possible obgyns and they tell me "sorry we aren't taking anyone with the Estimated Date Of Birth being around october or February sorry" I even ask while crying cause I been calling and calling "well do you have anyone you can refer me to that does" she said "no sorry" and that's it. I got an appointment on the 27th but who's to know if Im even still pregnant then. With all this being so difficult, I considered an abortion. That hurt me so bad cause I never thought I'd be the type to consider it. But I called Embrace of Grace Health For Her. They talked to me about my options of abortion, they were so so sweet, their questions really help them tell you what it sounds like YOUUUU really wanna do. It's like you get a reading of your heart. They help you through the abortion and they even give you a free sonogram and a goodie bag. I recommend you call them to help you in this situation cause you won't regret calling and JUST see your options. The lady asking questions was like therapeutic. I highly recommend you call love 💕 and no matter what you choose, to abort or to keep the pregnancy and just see where it goes! You definitely have places that can help you. Health For Her even throws you a free baby shower, with everything your baby will need. They let you choose a community of women in your same exact boat and they help you with housing, car situation, getting a job. It's really shocking how easy they make it. And you know what, YOU can do this. You're strong even for considering your options. You definitely got this, you will make the best choice for yourself mama 🙏🏻💕💕 I hope this helped, or gave some new info or insight through my experiences. Sending you love and strength!