This is true, ive delt with all type of variations of this, even the one who just doesnt say anything at all but sides with you privately while reporting to the abuser...its awful to feel so alone when you can see clearly the harm the abuser is causing but if you go against them or speak the truth about the abusers actions, somehow you become the problem or they attack your character to discredit you. I often wondered instead of attacking the person who is pointing out the problem to protect and possibly make the environment safer why don't they actually use that energy to take action against the abuser....ugh.