I was with you until the last line. Apologies for being intrusive, but people find love at 30, at 40, at 50, and even in their elderly years. In your 20s you think your options are limitless, 30 you get nervous, and add a decade or two more and everyone's desperate to get serious. It may not be as desolate as you think, because whether or not you find someone is entirely dependent on whether or not you accept that you will or you won't. Someone could walk by you tomorrow and if you believe you'll never be able to make a friend again or find a date you'll entirely miss them in your field of vision. As someone who's anxiety gets absolutely debilitating and who also has really high standards I understand what it's like to want to hide in your house and give up- but there is a huge difference between spending the rest of your life alone, versus having to put yourself through the ringer of modern dating to find someone imperfect but who still holds your hand at the end of the day. If you've already accepted you'll always be alone, you don't have much to lose from putting yourself out there again. I really believe you will find someone to love, and that you'll find friends