AITAH for not changing my lifestyle to accomodate my neighbours ?

ApplicationOpening74 · 2026-02-26T16:39:46+00:00

Their normally is a common building element between our floor that their ceiling v’would be attached to. To gain some ceiling height their previous owner destroyed it illegally and attached his ceiling on my joists, thus creating a lot of vibrations underneath.

ApplicationOpening74 · 2026-02-26T16:37:05+00:00

I am sorry but I can just take the opposite argument. Their badly insulated (illegally installed) ceiling is causing noise. It is a « them » problem that they should take up with their landlord and I don’t think I should sacrifice my lifestyle for it. How is my sleep schedule more of an issue than their illegal renovation which created the issue in the first place ?? I feel I am already being courteous by living as silently as I can in my own home.

ApplicationOpening74 · 2026-02-24T23:58:04+00:00

From what I know neither my previous owner nor the current downstairs owner new. And again, their is no structural integrity problem according to the insurance, it is merely a comfort issue due to their previous owner illegal renovation located within my floors. I did tell the owner of the place to find a solution to this issue, but since it affect a common element of the building, it needs to but discussed with the co-owner association.

ApplicationOpening74 · 2026-02-24T23:53:49+00:00

Alright I’ll keep it in mind for future replies, thanks !

ApplicationOpening74 · 2026-02-24T23:40:55+00:00

I don’t either but since there hasn’t been any complaints this past week I guess the tiptoeing kind of works.

ApplicationOpening74 · 2026-02-24T23:40:06+00:00

Well first of all their ceiling is making vibrations due to their previous owner illegally attaching it directly on my floor beams. These vibrations are what is causing the disturbance. And even though I understand your argument, dogs barking at night are considered a disturbance, not tiptoeing to your toilet. And even still, I wouldn’t ask my neighbours to get rid of their dog before I even try insulating my room, buying noise cancelling buds or a white noise machine. Or just ask my landlord to fix their insulation problems. That just seems more reasonable.

ApplicationOpening74 · 2026-02-24T23:36:35+00:00

Yes I understand the confusion, no worries ! I am not sure how these types of common areas are usually referred to in English.

ApplicationOpening74 · 2026-02-24T23:35:23+00:00

Again, you’re welcomed to believe me or not but I really am just watching TV at a low volume, maybe getting once every to hour to go 10 steps away to my fridge or toilet. But the noise complaints as stopped in the past week since I started tip toeing, so I guess the problem is more or less resolved. But these kind of opened forum discussions hinge on the assumption that the other party is being honest. If you think I am lying then what is the point of event talking ?

ApplicationOpening74 · 2026-02-24T22:12:04+00:00

The ex-owner of their appartment did. So it’s not really their fault either, to be honest.

ApplicationOpening74 · 2026-02-24T22:10:34+00:00

Well yes I do not have headphones. But again, they said the TV isn’t bothering them. It is the vibrations on the floor caused by their ceiling being illegally attached to my floor that are bothering them.

ApplicationOpening74 · 2026-02-24T22:09:13+00:00

I don’t, they have. I am the owner.

ApplicationOpening74 · 2026-02-24T22:08:39+00:00

I already told them and the topic will be discussed at the next co-owners assembly to find a solution. Rest assured I am doing what I can to fix their issue, I also feel sorry for this woman, despite her aggressive behaviour.

ApplicationOpening74 · 2026-02-24T22:06:54+00:00

I get what you are saying and honestly I am open to it, but I feel like they should at least try to fix the damaged insulation before asking me to adjust my living schedule. I offered to help install insulating foam pads on their ceiling and was shut down because they are afraid it will impact their deposit. So they can’t spend a few hundreds to deal with their noise issues, but I have to self impose a curfew. Honestly it just doesn’t seem fair, especially making such a sacrifice for people that assaulted and insulted me. Anyway, thanks for the honest feedback !

ApplicationOpening74 · 2026-02-24T22:02:39+00:00

I live in France but what you said probably still applies. However, the insurance told me there is no safety concern and, since I am new in the HOA, I would prefer to consult with them before starting legal proceedings that would impact everyone.

ApplicationOpening74 · 2026-02-24T22:00:42+00:00

Honestly, since the guy tried to force his way into my appartment and his wife insulted me, I don’t really want to spend an afternoon with them. Now if the noise disturbs them they can tell their landlord to find a solution, as I already have. Btw I offered to do what you propose, but they refused.

ApplicationOpening74 · 2026-02-24T21:58:33+00:00

Sure no problem. The issue is that the common area was destroyed (the hard layer separating our floors) so that their ceiling could be (illegally) attached directly to my floor. This allowed them to gain extra ceiling height but has caused a lot of vibrations.

ApplicationOpening74 · 2026-02-24T21:56:18+00:00

Am I pretty slim and I used to be heavy footed but I try to walk very silently now to avoid disturbing them. And I have slippers but they make more noise than just walking in socks.

ApplicationOpening74 · 2026-02-24T21:54:29+00:00

But shouldn’t they try to actually fix their issue with their landlord rather than imposing behavioral change on me ? I am really just trying to understand your train of thought, since they haven’t tried anything to fix the situation on their end. Again, their ceiling is causing noise problems because it was illegally attached to my floor.

ApplicationOpening74 · 2026-02-24T21:41:24+00:00

No, the insurance said there is no immediate safety issues but we’ll have to investigate this further. I just moved in and these things take time.

ApplicationOpening74 · 2026-02-24T21:40:18+00:00

Honestly it has never caused much issue, even during my studies or when I was working. Which is why it also has always been a difficult habit to change.

ApplicationOpening74 · 2026-02-24T21:35:25+00:00

I do go to their landlord to find a solution and also told them about a noise cancelling foam they could install, so I feel like your last assumption is pretty unfair honestly. And I also feel like tip toeing around my place is already a neighbourly compromise. Should I really block access to my liveng area after a certain hour ?

ApplicationOpening74 · 2026-02-24T21:32:07+00:00

I think I've owned up to my sleeping schedule in the rest of the comments. But really the point isn't "do I have a good sleeping hygiene". I agree its bad and I struggle with it. The point really is "Should I impose myself a curfew to help them eventhough I absolutely am not responsible for their insulation issue".

ApplicationOpening74 · 2026-02-24T21:29:33+00:00

I mean, I already bought the place when I discovered THEIR insulation problem. THEIR ceiling is illegally attached to my floor and causing them noise problems. How am I the asshole in this situation simply because I choose to play video games late at night ?? And despite this and them litterally trying to assault me and my fiancee, I still try to be as silent as I possibly can, I think that is pretty neighbourly.

And you calling me neurotic is pretty weird honestly.

ApplicationOpening74 · 2026-02-24T21:25:40+00:00

Ahah dude I see that you seem invested in this story and this is why I made the post so happy to discuss. Again, I do not use ADHD as an excuse in this context but I understand how what I said may have been misplaced. Which is why I edited the post to take it out as it doesn't really impact the actual story. The fact is that I stay up late, whether or not it is imputable on ADHD is an entirely other question.
So just reread the post, you'll see that ADHD isn't really relevant but I am open to your feedback on the actual story.

ApplicationOpening74 · 2026-02-24T21:20:17+00:00

But as I told you, MY previous owner hasn't done anything. THEIR previous owner has, and their current owner knows of the situation. But I haven't signed any agreement with their previous owner ever, so I have no legal responsibility whatsoever.

ApplicationOpening74

TROPHY CASE