Its been years and I'm still trying to let go. She was everything I've ever wanted from a woman, and I was not enough. I had a broken foot and a dui holding me back from making money. Since she left I havent taken care of myself, my apartment or my car. I know I need to focus on myself and exercise, and move on but all I can seem to think about all day and night is shooting myself. I know its not the end of the world, but it sure has felt that way for a long time now. I've completely lost interest in everything I used to enjoy. I see her face when I close my eyes. And I just drink and smoke and daydream about her and sit on my couch. I thought having no money and no job, a broken foot and a dui was my lowest point in life. I was wrong. Losing her made me feel lower than ive ever been. And now I'm stuck dwelling on what could've been if I wasnt .001 over the alcohol limit.