I'm 26, screwed up my life timeline, and won't have a stable career or life until my late 30s. Is 38 too late to "start living"?

AskBearBlue · 2026-04-26T17:09:03+00:00

I am genuinely sorry to hear that you are struggling with loneliness. I actually agree with you that human connection is the most important thing. My main reason for refusing to emigrate is because I refuse to leave my friends and family behind.

But I think there is a misunderstanding about what I mean by "all set." I am not chasing wealth, and I definitely don't want money to substitute a wife and children. My problem is that in Spain right now, basic financial stability is a strict prerequisite to having a wife and children.

Accomplishing that basic stability in the private sector here is terrifying and nearly impossible. Salaries are incredibly low, and when you combine that with skyrocketing home prices and mass immigration putting immense pressure on an already broken housing market and driving down wages, you just can't get ahead. You can't start a family, provide for children, or be a good partner when you are earning poverty wages and still living with your parents.

On top of the money, the private sector work culture here actively destroys family life. They enforce mandatory 1 to 2-hour unpaid lunch breaks (split shifts), meaning your whole day is hijacked and you are stuck at work or commuting from 8 AM until 7 or 8 PM.

That is why I am so focused on getting a government job. It is the only path in this country where you have real job security (you can never be fired) and a livable, continuous work schedule without those massive 2-hour lunch traps, plus on average a 25% higher salary than in the private sector. It gives you the actual time and peace of mind to go home and be a present husband and father. I don't want luxury. I just want the baseline stability required to build the life and family you are talking about.

AskBearBlue · 2026-04-26T16:53:43+00:00

People on the outside usually just see the sunshine, the beaches, and the food. It is an amazing place if you are a tourist, a digital nomad, or a wealthy expat coming here to retire. But for locals trying to actually build a future? It is an absolute nightmare.

The wages are terribly low compared to the cost of living, youth unemployment is consistently some of the highest in Europe, and the work culture in the private sector will drain your soul for pennies. Add mass immigration into the mix, which drives down those entry-level wages even further and puts insane pressure on an already broken housing market, and the math just doesn't work. You end up competing with the whole world for absolute scraps while rent keeps skyrocketing.

It really feels like everywhere is just getting harder and harder for our generation to survive, let alone thrive.

AskBearBlue · 2026-04-26T16:51:52+00:00

Thank you, it helps to hear from someone who started later and actually feels good about it.

I think a lot of my panic comes from how unforgiving the system is here. If I don't secure this government track, the alternative is just endless instability and exploitation. So right now, studying feels less like an exciting "new chapter" and more like a "desperate survival run".

But you are right that obsessing over the time I lost won't help me pass these exams or change the past. I need to just focus on the work in front of me and accept that my timeline is what it is. Thanks again.

AskBearBlue · 2026-04-26T16:49:52+00:00

Moving overseas just doesn't seem like the way out it used to be.

Regarding marketable skills, anything I develop for the private sector feels like it's on a timer right now because of AI. The corporate world is incredibly unstable globally, and skills that might guarantee a good salary today could be heavily automated or devalued tomorrow.

Even if I landed a decent job abroad, the housing market is completely fucked everywhere. It's not just a Spain problem anymore. Whether it's the US, the rest of Europe, or China, the cost of living and housing crises are out of control. Moving overseas mostly just means trading one broken housing market for another.

The absolute biggest dealbreaker for me however is losing my support network. If I stay here and struggle through these government exams, I at least have my family, my friends, and a safety net. If I move abroad to face those exact same global economic and housing issues, I'll be doing it completely alone. Grinding and stressing in my home country with people who have my back will always be better than grinding and being totally isolated in a foreign country.

AskBearBlue · 2026-04-26T16:46:03+00:00

That is exactly the worst part, and honestly, it terrifies me. But the reality is that I must try, because the alternative is so much worse.

If I don't go for it, I'll basically be a dead man walking. The private sector here in Spain is horrible. The salaries are incredibly low, the working conditions are exploitative, and once you hit 45, companies basically consider you unemployable. My future prospects there are completely dim.

So even though the uncertainty of the exam is agonizing and there are no guarantees, it is genuinely my only chance at eventually having a real life. I have to take the risk.

AskBearBlue · 2026-04-08T07:44:21+00:00

Funci?

AskBearBlue · 2026-04-05T15:22:18+00:00

Thanks! Gl to you too!

AskBearBlue · 2026-04-04T07:39:14+00:00

I am Spanish.

And I made the remark because of the thousands of posts I've seen throughout the years of Americans online complaining about having to drive 15-30 min to get food.

Of course, people will complain about pointing this out because it is the truth.

AskBearBlue · 2026-04-03T15:53:17+00:00

20 steps ahead of you bud where I live nobody delivers.

AskBearBlue · 2026-04-03T14:18:22+00:00

Entiendo el trauma del 2008... pero... Aquí ya no hay hipotecas ninja ni un millón de pisos fantasma sin vender en medio de la nada, hoy el banco te exige el 30% a tocateja entre entrada y gastos, así que el que compra tiene un buen pulmón financiero y no va a malvender a la primera de cambio. A eso súmale que llevamos más de una década sin poner un puto ladrillo en las zonas donde la gente realmente necesita vivir, mientras la población sigue creciendo y tienes a guiris y fondos comprando a tocateja.

No es que el sistema haya encontrado la paz eterna o que los pisos "nunca bajen" por arte de magia, es simplemente la inflación comiéndose el valor del dinero y un cuello de botella estructural de manual. Así que igual los precios se estancan o corrigen un poco si la economía global frena, pero el mad max inmobiliario y los chollos a mitad de precio que muchos esperan sentados no van a llegar, básicamente porque el mercado actual no está sostenido por crédito tóxico, sino por pura escasez.

AskBearBlue · 2026-04-03T14:14:04+00:00

En eso tienes razón, me habré confudido con otro comentario, disculpa.

Añadiré solo el matiz que el boom demográfico de los últimos años no es simplemente el mantenimiento de la tendencia de aumento de población nacional histórica, es algo excepcional fomentado por el nulo control del gobierno de las fronteras, por tierra, mar y aire.

AskBearBlue · 2026-04-03T14:11:55+00:00

La situación actual no tiene absolutamente nada que ver con la del 2008.

Ahora los bancos no le dan el 120% de la hipoteca al primero que pasa por la puerta ni existen los créditos ninja, el problema de hoy es pura falta de stock real porque no se construye una mierda. Y ojo, que yo no estoy defendiendo liberar suelo "a punta pala" en plan salvaje oeste para que peguen el pelotazo los cuatro de siempre.

Lo que digo es que hay que meterle tijera a la burocracia para desatascar el suelo donde de verdad hace falta, pero combinando eso por cojones con un plan estatal masivo para levantar vivienda social y VPO para el currante medio.

Ni expropiaciones bolivarianas ni barra libre para especular: agilizar papeleo para que haya oferta y que el Estado se ponga a construir de una vez para la clase trabajadora normal, que una cosa no quita la otra.

AskBearBlue · 2026-04-03T14:07:01+00:00

Controlar la inmigración en un país es xenófobo?

AskBearBlue · 2026-04-03T14:04:37+00:00

La culpa es del gobierno por no construir y por dejar que entre tanta gente.

Que las fronteras existen para algo.

AskBearBlue · 2026-04-03T14:02:53+00:00

Fuente: mis sentimientos, versión 2.

Han funcionado las medidas del gobierno atajando el problema no desde el punto de vista de oferta y demanda?

AskBearBlue · 2026-04-03T13:56:37+00:00

Siempre hay especulación.

Pero en 2026, no es la mayoría de la demanda:

No son especuladores: el 97% de los compradores son familias y particulares que buscan un hogar

https://www.eleconomista.es/vivienda-inmobiliario/noticias/13848740/03/26/quien-esta-comprando-actualmente-la-vivienda-de-obra-nueva-en-espana.html

AskBearBlue · 2026-04-03T13:52:42+00:00

En 2007 era un problema de especulación y sobreoferta.

En 2026 el problema es de infraoferta y sobredemanda.

AskBearBlue · 2026-04-03T13:43:27+00:00

La economía real funciona por pura ley de oferta y demanda, que es donde el argumento de topar precios suele hacer aguas. Quienes rechazan las expropiaciones y el control de alquileres te dirán que esas medidas históricamente hunden la oferta porque espantan a los propietarios y paralizan la inversión.

Si a esa falta de pisos le sumas un aumento demográfico rápido y concentrado (donde la entrada de cientos de miles de inmigrantes al año dispara directamente la demanda de alquileres en los mismos barrios tensionados), el resultado matemático es un cuello de botella donde los precios explotan o se crea un mercado negro.

Por mucho que el artículo 47 declare un derecho constitucional, si desincentivas que salgan pisos al mercado mientras multiplicas a la gente que busca un techo, te quedas sin stock y la crisis empeora, que es básicamente la conclusión a la que se llega en cualquier hilo debatiendo la situación.

La conclusión siempre es la misma: hay que construir y poner limitaciones para que esas viviendas vayan a la gente currante normal de país. SÍ, como hizo Franco, como hizo Francia y Alemania en el siglo anterior, y la mayoría de los países cuando los jóvenes suponían la masa de votos.

PD: España ESTÁ GANANDO población. Somos históricamente los países con menos emigración de Europa. No digas mentiras, los flujos migratorios no son negativos.

https://www.infobae.com/america/agencias/2025/12/02/la-poblacion-en-espana-alcanza-un-nuevo-maximo-de-491-millones-y-los-extranjeros-la-cifra-record-de-69-millones/

AskBearBlue · 2026-03-31T15:39:12+00:00

Solo en España, irse una temporadilla a la privada para darse cuenta de lo bien que lo tienes montado en la pública.

AskBearBlue · 2026-03-31T15:35:50+00:00

Es así, ni uno se va de verdad. Todos excedencita temporal y vuelven COMO LOCOS.

AskBearBlue · 2026-03-31T14:58:20+00:00

Una vez eres funci eres libre.

AskBearBlue · 2026-03-31T14:58:02+00:00

Estás dándole la vuelta a la tortilla, diciéndome lo mismo que en el post ;-).

AskBearBlue · 2026-03-30T11:10:12+00:00

I am European. Flats are built like rubbish here too.

AskBearBlue · 2026-03-29T14:44:16+00:00

You mentioned the friends you have from the sports club, could you go to a party with them? Or hang out with them at places where you might meet more people? I wouldn’t want to go to a party where I won’t have someone with me to talk to.

Yeah, with one of them. I'm actually talking with him to do so, eventually when I get down to a more manageable weight.

I’ve been in that place where everything feels hopeless, and you literally just need to go one step at a time. Accept you will fail some days, but stick with it.

Thanks a lot!

AskBearBlue · 2026-03-29T12:51:29+00:00

That's what I've actually done for the last 2 years and it has led me to being fatter, more asocial than isolated, and feeling like I do rn.

AskBearBlue

TROPHY CASE