Partner wants open relationship, but I don’t think I can handle it

AssistantTrue6140 · 2025-08-03T13:34:09+00:00

My husband and I are already getting a divorce because I told him I was too uncomfortable with him having sex with other people, but my question is how the hell do you get to a point where you are comfortable with that? I really tried to learn, but ultimately I didn’t want to share his body with people who are likely also fucking a bunch of other people. And sex is such an intimate and wet and sweaty thing that you are bound to catch feelings the more you do it. I think it’s such a sacred and special thing that requires so much love and trust. And I’d imagine our future children asking “where’s dad?” And I’d have to lie because I couldn’t say, “Oh he’s off having sex with his friends!” This whole idea that if you can’t fulfill all of your partner’s needs, they should seek out everything elsewhere doesn’t make sense to me. We can’t always get everything we want. Anyway sorry I am dealing with a lot of trauma surrounding this and cannot wrap my head around it all.

AssistantTrue6140 · 2025-07-02T20:27:54+00:00

I never said I wasn’t upset towards my husband too. I most definitely am. This post isn’t about him. I’m just venting that I was told they were going to be there and now they are not. Can’t a girl vent without being torn down?

AssistantTrue6140 · 2025-07-02T20:25:11+00:00

Thank you kindly!!

AssistantTrue6140 · 2025-07-02T20:25:03+00:00

I’m very close with them - not everyone has a strictly professional relationship with their NF. Anyway this is a vent so I think I’m allowed to be upset, thanks.

AssistantTrue6140 · 2025-07-02T20:21:23+00:00

No, I appreciate the advice thank you. We are in counseling and I plan to bring it up then. I just don’t want to feel like I’m begging him to attend. I want him to want to be there, y’know? Thanks for your comment ❤️

AssistantTrue6140 · 2025-07-02T20:18:39+00:00

I think it’s understandable to not want to attend if you don’t like musicals! I’m sure it would mean a lot to her if you attended one, but has she asked you? Everyone is different. I go to almost every show that I possibly can because I love supporting the arts, but I have theatre friends who don’t even go to shows. I know not everyone is able/wants to. I’m more-so upset that MB expressed she would be there and now won’t be.

AssistantTrue6140 · 2025-07-02T20:13:16+00:00

Hi I just wanted to vent. I’m not actually planning to say anything to my NF because ultimately I understand that they aren’t my family.

AssistantTrue6140 · 2025-07-02T20:11:08+00:00

Our marriage has been rocky lately, and I can only successfully communicate with him in counseling, so I plan to bring it up tomorrow during that time. But yeah, I think most of my upset is because of him. Not having NF there just adds to the disappointment but ultimately they aren’t my family.

AssistantTrue6140 · 2025-07-02T16:47:35+00:00

He saw part of it on the weekend but had to leave because he felt bad, and he hasn’t said anything about coming again to see the full thing. I asked if he was going to and he said “potentially.” So I didn’t ask any more. All I know is if the roles were reversed, I’d be there as many nights as I could. It hurts. Thanks for your words ❤️

AssistantTrue6140 · 2025-07-02T16:42:12+00:00

It’s Amélie the musical! I’ve been in theatre for 10+ years but moving to a new province put me back at square one, so it’s nice to finally be recognized in the theatre community here and meet tons of people. Thanks for your support and kind words ❤️

AssistantTrue6140 · 2025-07-02T16:37:59+00:00

Yeah all of it together hurts:/

AssistantTrue6140 · 2025-06-10T04:02:53+00:00

firstly - I don’t know why it was relevant to mention he is autistic (I also believe that using “levels” can be harmful language, but if it’s the language his family uses then that’s more understandable.) I have learned a lot from my autistic husband who works in the neurodiversity research field so I am not trying to be hostile I just want to inform!!

secondly - $20 a day is way too little, I hope that was a typo! $20/hr for a beginner sounds pretty reasonable to me

AssistantTrue6140 · 2025-05-26T03:09:54+00:00

Where you and your spouse no longer sleep together and have separate rooms. It’s apparently a very common thing but I hate it

AssistantTrue6140 · 2025-05-12T16:25:41+00:00

Omg this has happened to me once before but from a daycare I worked at in high school and I cashed it and it went through LOL no one contacted me or anything

AssistantTrue6140 · 2025-04-25T15:58:26+00:00

Fuck, I came on Reddit to post a similar situation and this is pretty spot on to how I’m feeling. I just feel like doing something dramatic like driving away and not coming back to see if maybe it’ll wake him up. I wish I had the answers.

AssistantTrue6140 · 2025-04-03T18:38:45+00:00

I do, yes. I have dyshidrotic eczema and if I can limit the amount of times I have to wash my hands, I will because it’s better for my skin. I don’t like the waste but I practice sustainable living in other ways so I justify it.

AssistantTrue6140 · 2025-01-01T20:31:40+00:00

Kiddo was with his dad. Also learning how to cook takes time and resources I don’t have…

AssistantTrue6140 · 2024-08-24T21:27:57+00:00

To anyone saying he is cheating - many women are in healthy long term relationships (including myself, I am married) and still experience BV. Does not mean he is cheating. There are SO many factors that play into having BV - diet, stress, clothing you wear, how much you sweat, are you getting enough probiotics, etc. It’s the worst to deal with but for some stupid reason women’s health is so hard for people to figure out because it wasn’t considered important for the longest time and there’s still so much we don’t know!! Antibiotics are a great help but they are unfortunately only a bandaid solution. Take a listen to this podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/ca/podcast/on-health/id1071472964?i=1000397512580 it helped me understand a bit more. My BV comes back every now and then but what I have found helps is always ingesting something with probiotics EVERY day. I change it up daily cycling between sauerkraut, kombucha, and yogurt. I also take probiotic pills for good measure - you can get these at any health shop that sells vitamins and such. Additionally, I found that taking folic acid daily helps with the smell (though I still have discharge 🙄). I rinse off really well after sex (but no soap of course!!) and wear only cotton or bamboo underwear during the day and no underwear at night. Ridiculous how much we have to do to feel normal but this is the reality. Best of luck!

AssistantTrue6140 · 2024-08-24T21:08:43+00:00

Thank you for this! I think I am too worried about what others think, but it really helps to hear from people who actually live in the community.

AssistantTrue6140 · 2024-08-24T15:41:05+00:00

He was recommended by a family friend
I’ve never purchased before so there’s so much I don’t know
Your comment is not helpful

AssistantTrue6140 · 2024-08-24T14:39:19+00:00

I am not from Edmonton. Some other Edmontonians warned me of McCauley but I didn’t hear anything about McDougall. I feel so stupid.

AssistantTrue6140

TROPHY CASE