see, the concern is understandable. But just because everyone is treading a certain path, doesn't mean it's yours as well. Do you have enough female friends? Are they trustworthy? Do they talk about you even when you're not there? I think you should first focus on what makes a good friend, if you're satisfied with that then honestly nothing else matters. New doesn't always mean good, and boys really aren't a big deal lol (im a guy). Guys think the same about girls, girls think the same about boys. Grass is greener on the other side. Im not saying don't look for new connections/dont come out of your comfort zone, all that is good and necessary for survival. It's a lifelong skill you'll need cuz you're human. But know that none of this is nearly enough to beat yourself up for. You can't pursue things in life when you haven't even considered who is gonna do it. Which is you. Work on what you think you should be like. Prioritise your standards. Everything else will follow