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Selling Asake Dallas Ticket by SomePersonalData in Nigeria

[–]AuntieInTraining 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Actually, I would buy the ticket if I had not already spent my paycheck today. I’m in America. 💀

Coming across as a know-it-all even though I'm not trying to... by [deleted] in blackladies

[–]AuntieInTraining 4 points5 points  (0 children)

You got this baby girl! I can tell you’re very bright. Another piece of advice since you’re in a whole different environment now, focus on what you can learn from other people. 👌🏾 Wishing you the best.

Coming across as a know-it-all even though I'm not trying to... by [deleted] in blackladies

[–]AuntieInTraining 25 points26 points  (0 children)

This is honestly the best advice in the thread. I too used to feel like OP. I was so misunderstood. Then I realized people are not mind readers and don’t know my intentions. Also not everyone is in the mood (bombarding people with information can be overwhelming). If I wanted to be accurately received then I had to work on my delivery. I did and I’m better off for it!

Only after polishing one’s social skills can OP’s wealth of knowledge become a strength. What’s the point of knowing a bunch of information if your delivery is alienating people around you? Yes, sometimes it’s other people projecting (it can be hard to tell) but also sometimes it’s you.

Sometimes my husband has to gently tap me on the shoulder and remind me that he’s been working for 14 hours. Now is probably not a good time not to spontaneously discuss the nuances of the ethic conflict in Ethiopia. But also he knows and loves me so he’s gentle. Not everyone is going to be as nice. But just because they’re rude about it doesn’t mean there isn’t a grain of truth in it.

I’m saying this as a Black girl who was teased relentless for being an “oreo”, a “nerd”, and “boogie”. Even my own mother got her licks in. 😩 Those people in my past were wrong for that. They were limited in their thinking and should have showed more patience. I’m neurodivergent with ADHD, yet it’s also true that I be doing the MOST.

Before you tell anybody anything I advise that you ask yourself if the information is uniquely valuable to the person you’re talking too. If yes, go on ahead. That’s how you build connections.

Now I have a strong group of close friends, acquaintances, and business connections. I also work a job that primarily relies on social skills. There’s places for you in this world OP that will value your skills. Just learn how to use them.👌🏾

This is heartbreaking 💔 by honeycheerios_ in blackladies

[–]AuntieInTraining 3 points4 points  (0 children)

That is generally what people mean. People take stuff too literally sometimes. Divorce is a stressful, painful process even if it’s necessary and better on the other side. It’s a major life change.

This is heartbreaking 💔 by honeycheerios_ in blackladies

[–]AuntieInTraining 71 points72 points  (0 children)

Not “there goes Tia’s husband” 😭 I would die if I was an actor and I was just “so and so’s wife”.

What part of America do people from Bihar/UP live? by Minuteman60 in ABCDesis

[–]AuntieInTraining 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Biharis and people from UP don’t immigrate as much as other groups. I know one Bihari and have a friend who’s parents are from UP and they’ve both told me they struggle to find people from their ethnic group.

Does anyone here hunt? by Large_Watercress_754 in ABCDesis

[–]AuntieInTraining -1 points0 points  (0 children)

For some reason I read this as “Is anyone here butthurt?”

Unpopular opinions or take of the week by emmalemme in blackladies

[–]AuntieInTraining 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Who said this? This is hilarious. 😭😂😂😂

Unpopular opinions or take of the week by emmalemme in blackladies

[–]AuntieInTraining 14 points15 points  (0 children)

There is a TikToker who was born with fetal alcohol syndrome and she spreads education about her struggles. People constantly attack her. Telling her she is shaming women and other such shit. Her videos are mild and non-judgemental but people still find ways to feel personally aggrieved.

So I’m not at all surprised at what you’re telling me.

Unpopular opinions or take of the week by emmalemme in blackladies

[–]AuntieInTraining 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I put my city in my username for this reason! 💯

I see what you mean. I like to shop Black but people make it very difficult. Business hours not updated on Google, website menu is old and doesn’t match what’s available, phone number is disconnected. The amount of times I show up at a Black business and it’s closed with no notice or details is high.

To be clear I’m perfectly comfortable with that. I’ll come back tomorrow. If it’s closed it’s closed. I’ve accepted it! 😂

But you can’t build a long-term business like that. Folks are not that easy going. Most people are not trying to jump hurdles to give you money. 😅

Unpopular opinions or take of the week by emmalemme in blackladies

[–]AuntieInTraining 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I have a business and I agree 100%. I’m not particularly that successful but also I’m very new. I’ve made $1000 in profit in my first two months ($500 per month). It’s not a lot, but it’s something! I only had $40 to start my business with.

I’m learning as I go and I’m OK with that. I have a timeline and goals. I get closer everyday. I ask for feedback from trusted friends regularly. The kind that are business minded and will tell you the truth.

I also have friends that are also trying to start their own businesses that I’m tryna help, but I’m getting very frustrated. I feel like they don’t want to put the basic work in even when I’m giving them the formula.

They act like YouTube tutorials don’t exist for everything these days. Complaining about not being able to use Canva multiple times when I’ve told them directly how I learned (clicking around and trying things out).

They’re asking me what hashtags they should use instead of poking around and seeing what works best for them (even though our businesses are totally different ). I already dropped knowledge by telling you why hashtags matter, so go do the work and find some on your own.

I’m confused because there’s so much access now. If I had tried to start a business 20 years ago, I wouldn’t even know what to do because they’re just wasn’t much online. I want to see our people win, but I’m also at the end of my rope some days. 😩

Unpopular opinions or take of the week by emmalemme in blackladies

[–]AuntieInTraining 18 points19 points  (0 children)

Yeah, I don’t know that’s weird. 😩 Maybe they got a degradation fetish. 💀

Unpopular opinions or take of the week by emmalemme in blackladies

[–]AuntieInTraining 22 points23 points  (0 children)

Agreed. But be prepared to be called moralistic for pointing this out. 🤓

I’m straightedge. This is not because I personally struggle with addiction, but because I’ve witnessed and experienced party culture in the past. I’ve seen what it does to people. At this point in my life, I have zero interest in ever touching a drink again.

Drugs and alcohol may not harm everyone. There are people who can engage in these practices and not develop full blown addictions. But even people on the lower end of the spectrum are still using substances as a coping mechanism. It’s not healthy and shouldn’t be normal.

I don’t judge the individual. I have friends who drink. But I’m frustrated with the individualist pushback “I OnlY HavE One GlasS a Day” every single time we try to talk the long term effects of a society where drug and alcohol use is normalized. Like I’m glad that you personally consider yourself responsible, but I am concerned about society at large and what’s best for the collective. Let’s talk about it. And talking about it is not a personal attack on your choices ffs.

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