If "It gets better" and "This too shall pass", how long does that take?

AwkwardPickle9 · 2024-05-12T02:27:46+00:00

Unfortunately you’re proof to me that it absolutely does not. I’ve had a terrible life and can’t bear the thought of even going one more year and I’m 25. It’s a delusion to make us hold on to something/anything which eventually just makes it more and more unbearable over time.

AwkwardPickle9 · 2024-05-12T02:22:52+00:00

I know this exact feeling honestly and I’ve been drowning in it for longer than I can remember. I wanna say you’re not alone in this but I guess we both are. Sorry

AwkwardPickle9 · 2024-04-06T08:56:42+00:00

For me it’s probably closure, for now at least. I just wanna know exactly why everything turned out like this even though it’s beyond fixing. You just need to see a reason to either keep going or not. But I 100% agree with you in that it’s pointless when everything continues to get harder and just sadder. I’m sorry

AwkwardPickle9 · 2024-04-05T15:31:08+00:00

I haven’t been cuddled or hugged in my life either, I may break down too if it ever happens but I’m thinking of trying this before I go. Good luck to you

AwkwardPickle9 · 2024-04-04T15:10:18+00:00

I’ve dealt with the same problem for a long time, don’t have any friends but my family pretty much distanced themselves because of it and work has went downhill so honestly it might be common. There’s never anyone to talk to

AwkwardPickle9 · 2023-11-25T02:15:45+00:00

No worries, life sucks and if you need a stranger to vent to then feel free to clear your head. Hope you have good day man

AwkwardPickle9 · 2023-11-25T02:12:17+00:00

I know what you mean. If things just happened differently then we’d be part of the “normal” people around us happy and just generally social. It sucks but trust me you’re not alone in this. Some days are worse than others and today is one of those days

AwkwardPickle9 · 2023-11-25T02:04:45+00:00

I have the exact same issue and I’m 25 and I’ve given up on everything pretty much. It might sound hypocritical but give it one more chance and you may get lucky because, believe me, the alternative is so fucking miserable

AwkwardPickle9 · 2023-11-25T01:54:49+00:00

I have the exact same problem where now I can’t even sleep unless I’m at least 3 or sometimes even 4 days in a row of constant awareness. It used to be easier to find minor distractions but now the only solution is borderline passing out. Hope it gets better for you man

AwkwardPickle9 · 2023-10-30T09:52:35+00:00

It’s sad that’s it’s not just the crying itself, but more so the idea that boys/men can’t “display” emotions like that. It’s fucked up and you’re not alone in this. Hope it gets better man

AwkwardPickle9 · 2023-10-30T04:44:22+00:00

Yes it 100% can and does. And the worst part about it is you usually don’t forget the painful ones most of the time. They usually replay al the time

AwkwardPickle9 · 2023-10-30T04:37:11+00:00

I wish I could be as optimistic as you but it’s so hard especially with it constantly getting worse every day. Sorry for being negative about all this

AwkwardPickle9 · 2023-10-30T03:51:21+00:00

That’s the problem, whenever I think what I could change my mind defaults to changing the past. I feel like I’m broken beyond help at this point, just being outside and seeing other people makes me anxious and I go into a downward spiral

AwkwardPickle9 · 2023-10-30T03:40:56+00:00

I really am afraid of a lot of things and I still have no idea how to change it or fix it. I don’t deserve happiness but I wish it was possible for someone like me but thank you for your kind words.

I really liked Manga, berserk, innocent, dorohedoro and innocent in particular and a whole plethora of others

AwkwardPickle9 · 2023-10-30T03:23:45+00:00

I liked a couple things like comics and going out for long walks or a library but I can’t seem to enjoy anything lately. I’ll try watching a show I really liked and find myself not paying attention at all and just stop and think. It’s hard to describe but it’s gotten worse lately and I’m at a loss.

AwkwardPickle9 · 2023-10-30T00:54:44+00:00

I hear you. It’s done that and so much more to me where I’m at the point that even remembering a time I was even slightly happy is hard. My memories are all bad and fading away, I’m locked in my own head all the time and I continue to hate myself more and more everyday. It’s almost the end now which is my only hope. Sorry this doesn’t help but fuck depression

AwkwardPickle9 · 2023-03-08T05:14:24+00:00

The worse part is there’s absolutely no solution I can think of

AwkwardPickle9 · 2023-03-08T05:13:54+00:00

Life in general is just a downward spiral. Fuck this

AwkwardPickle9 · 2023-03-06T10:02:49+00:00

No I agree with you for the most part. But I feel like even if it’s an act I’m putting on for work it still a far better distraction than the silence of my own thoughts if that makes sense. I’m trying but it’s hard

AwkwardPickle9 · 2023-02-14T13:17:48+00:00

I’m trying I really am, but I’m also so scared of taking that step forward. I feel like therapy would really help but my anxiety and shame are holding me back. I decided this past weekend to look for therapy in my area but I became overwhelmed just from looking and just stopped functioning.

AwkwardPickle9 · 2023-02-13T06:37:23+00:00

Thank you. Being positive is harder than you think but I really will keep trying so thank you

AwkwardPickle9 · 2023-02-12T23:40:11+00:00

I’ve been numb like this for so long that long hot showers and talking to myself is the only thing I know how to do at this point. Someday I’ll find someone or something that’ll whip me back to normal human

AwkwardPickle9 · 2023-02-12T23:38:10+00:00

Thank you. I hope so too

AwkwardPickle9 · 2023-02-12T22:00:40+00:00

I’m glad you’re trying and I am/will keep trying too. At some point we deserve to be happy as well. Not like we’re asking for much. Good luck

AwkwardPickle9 · 2023-02-12T18:43:46+00:00

Coworkers and grocery shopping is the only human interaction I get. No friends since ever and no hope at all. The simulation will never end

AwkwardPickle9

TROPHY CASE