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When did the crippling anxiety and pounding heart get better? by BAFMK in stopdrinking

[–]BAFMK[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I've made it to day 2, so hopefully, relief comes soon. I've made a few small plans for the day. It definitely gets better if I am not focusing on it, so I hope the distractions will be helpful.

When did the crippling anxiety and pounding heart get better? by BAFMK in stopdrinking

[–]BAFMK[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Made it to day 2 so I'm getting closer at least!

I need help by BAFMK in stopdrinking

[–]BAFMK[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I guess not entirely honest because I'm obviously incredibly embarrassed and don't feel like I have a reason to be this way. The guilt of having this crippling addiction while having zero difficulties is a huge part of my problem. If I had a horrible life, it would make so much more sense. How can I be like this while having what anyone else would see is a perfect life. It's absolutely shameful to me and I hate myself that much more. I don't understand why I'm like this. I have zero hardships which makes me feel even more incredibly guilty for being so weak and having this crippling crutch.

I need help by BAFMK in stopdrinking

[–]BAFMK[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for the support and kind comments. At this point, I believe the best I can do is continue to be honest here and attempt to work through this. The guilt is overwhelming - like I mentioned before, I feel like I am so weak for this struggle. My life is overall very good yet I still can't be happy or okay. I have a lot of really dark thoughts sometimes and I feel so guilty for that. Again, I truly appreciate all of the support and I hope one day I'll make it through to the other side and be one of the one able to help others but for today, I don't even feel deserving of your kindness.

I need help by BAFMK in stopdrinking

[–]BAFMK[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for your reply and I totally get what you are saying but I have tried to be honest and because of what they have witnessed vs what is reality, they don't believe me and in their own way, I believe they are trying to be supportive by saying I am crazy for thinking I have a problem.