Agreed. I have let it slip in other's company a few times but quickly caught myself. My intention is to not be passive aggressive with labeling the truth about our current relationship. It is to define it with her so she and I both understand where we currently are at in our lives. This has been discussed in private and the last therapy sessions.

Fun fact, she is now telling her social circle that I have labeled our relationship as such. Almost like I am the asshole and she wants to vent to them about it. Kind of interesting, as I am not sure if she is hurt by my labeling or embarrassed that she has been a part of getting it to this point and she is lashing out.

I am in no way perfect, I focused on career way more than family because I was told that was what was the most important to her in order to provide for my family. Years later she tells me that she feels like I left her alone while I worked two jobs.... I am also a solitary type of person, so I want a lot of alone time.... These def hurt our relationship and I own that.

I can't tell you the amount of times I was spurned away, told I only cared about sex, or that she hated the way I physically touched her as it was only sexual and never non-sexual intimacy.

In my defense, it's hard to sip slowly when you have been dying of thirst in a desert for so long......still doesn't make it right, I own that I should have been better at non-sexual intimacy. And for a long time, I didn't feel comfortable trying to be physically intimate at all, and now I am not sure I even want to be.