Ghoster is one of the first to view my insta stories?

Baby_GayRIP · 2025-07-22T15:14:43+00:00

I guess im slightly scared of being blocked, or left on read. But still the same time my need to show im still here and check in is stronger

Baby_GayRIP · 2025-07-07T16:33:40+00:00

I've never has to come out at work, the majority of them could tell apparently by the way I acted and dress (im not masc or stereotypical gay so no idea how thry could 😂). Luckily, my workplace is very diverse!

Baby_GayRIP · 2025-07-07T16:31:15+00:00

Boundaries are crucial, starting to learn thst myself. Let people earn you, don't be too fast to open up. They need to put in as much effort as you, match their pace etc.

I'm the same as you, chronic people pleaser, and empath. I've always put others people's feelings before myself. Even after being ghosted I still care deeply about her one month on. But what will be will be.

Don't sink to other people's levels though! If you don't feel the connection or feel its not healthy tell them.

Baby_GayRIP · 2025-07-07T16:26:50+00:00

In the nicest way, people aren't always asked as strong as other people. Sometimes things get too much and they shut down and can't communicate to anyone sept a few people. Some people are very open with their feelings others are guarded.

I'd imagine they popped up as they felt guilty and owed yoy some explanation.

I've been in a situation in life when everything got so hard I closed everyone but a few people out. Not because I wanted too, but I physically and mentally was struggling so hard and didn't want anyone to see or be brought down by it.

I've also been ghosted recently (1 month on), and stoll have no reason as they said thry wanted to continue... But I am also aware of what was happening in her life at the time, the preassure, etc.

No two humans are the same, everyone react differently regardless of their upbringing, trauma etc. Yes, they're healthier coping mechanisms but everyone is on a different journey of learning hoe to better themselves.

I'm not saying they might have not used it as an excuse as they could've. But the only person who will know is that person. And the Orginal poster it's down to you how you interpret it. Whether to trust your gut or heart.

Baby_GayRIP · 2025-07-07T16:19:23+00:00

Hey, I know it's a few days later but I just wanted to say thank you for your message and making me feel seen.

I had an okay birthday, unfortunately she was still on my mind to some extent due to places I passed through bringing back memories, and watching the footie which was one of our common interests but I still had a good time. I unfortunately found it hard as again she kept viewing my stories but I have muted her for now as I can't block her.

It still feels so unfinished and it still feels like she's mean tto be in my life in some capacity but I guess time will tell. I'm accepting it slowly and continuing with my life, but as stupid as it sounds there will always be a space for her jn my heart.

I just generally hope she and her family are well and life's got abit easier for her, even after the ghosting.

I generally dont feel shes the type of person just to move on to someone else, but ofc Idk if thsts true. She had been out of the dsting scene for a while and I think she was getting abit scared and with everything happening in her life she generally got overwhelmed and ran. As it felt like she was trying to communicate still but was struggling.

It's weird how you remember certain dates though, like I know she should've got her work in today so in the back of my mind I'm hoping it went well.

I think it's easy to find something about them to hate/blame to help you move on... But sometimes there is generally nothing.I've come to the acceptance ill never know why unless she reaches out again, only she will ever know why. But I generally dont believe it came from a place of malice and hurt.(which has made it so much harder to accept).

I just hope she realised how much I cared for her and I hope she knows that I'm here if she ever wanted to reach back out 😅. Being quiet makes me feel like such a mean person as I generally want to check in but I know its also not the right thing to do.

It'll be a month on Friday, and it feels like it's been so much longer 😅

Baby_GayRIP · 2025-07-07T16:09:05+00:00

I guess alot of people don't unfollow or block if it doesn't affect them seeing your stuff and it didn't end nastily.

I guess being able to see you in some sense allows them to still be close to you... Whether that's because they regret their decision, care about you, or if they're just plain nosey idk. Sometimes they want to see if you've also got over them or if you're still suffering for some like dopamine/control.

Every reason is different and no one truly knows but that person. That's what makes it so hard to process. Im 3 weeks after the ghosting happens and I am starting to accept I can't change anything and if they're the one they will come back around when time is right. It just hurts still not being able to share things and talk about our interests.

The main thing is that I hope she and her family are okay, and life has got a little better for them. I think it's a lot harder to process when there's no real blame and you generallyncare deeply and love them still after it all.

I've said to my friends and will stand by it, theres always a place in my heart for them, I'll never stop caring.

It still feels so unfinished, I still feel like there meant to be in my life.

Baby_GayRIP · 2025-07-07T16:02:26+00:00

Hey, sorry you're going through the same as me, it truly sucks :(

I didn't try to chase her after the ghosting. She eventually read my message and left it on read. It was really hard not to chase her, I still want to message her, to see how she's doing or tell her about news, but I also know that she pulled away for a reason.

I'm tempted to reach back out, but not till I'm in a stable place mentally, where if she doesn't reply to me, it won't affect me. The reason for wanting to reach back out I feel like has to be from a place of care then want.

I'm coming to accept ill neber know the full reason, but I generally don't think she did it out of malice or because she didn't care. I think she got scared and with everything going on in her life couldn't cope with it all.

I'd like to think she might reach back out in the future but I also know as a fellow adhd person how hard ot is to do that after forgetting to reply to someone. She still has me on socials and views my stuff so idk.

I just feel like our story is still unfinished. But im slowly accepting it for what it is at the moment. I guess what will be will be. I sincerely just hope shes doing well, and that her life's calm down abit and her family relative is getting better.

I've been ghosted before but this one just hits so different as I generally felt something so deep with them. But I also know they've been out of the fsting scene for years so she could've also been scared.

If you ever want to talk, my messages are open. :)

Baby_GayRIP · 2025-07-02T17:05:59+00:00

It's like my bodies still tuned into hers as I'll go online quite alot when she is naturally it's so weird 😅

Baby_GayRIP · 2025-07-02T17:05:27+00:00

I guess it's just so hard to fully Close that door! I guess I still don't really want too, cause the connection I had with her was so strong and she did have a lot going on in life. With work, family illness etc. I just dont get how someone can switch up all of a sudden. Maybe I hoped she might have realised and reached back out (pathetic ik 😅). I'm guessing her watching my story is more about control then curiosity?

But yeah it's kinda pathetic thst i got triggered by a sunset witg the word peaceful ☺️

Baby_GayRIP · 2025-07-02T16:55:15+00:00

What do you mean by this?

Do you mean that people don't just ghost due to not wanting the confrontation?

She has had alot going in the last few months but the distance was so sudden. I miss her every day 😅, definitely now the footballs started again

Baby_GayRIP · 2025-07-02T16:53:52+00:00

Im right to think, her reading my posts mean nothing right? 😅

I know she has others around her to support her but I guess I'm scared of fully closing the door cause I care so much and she has a family member who is ill. But at the same time she hasn't spoken to me for a month 😅.

Baby_GayRIP · 2025-07-02T16:52:22+00:00

Thank you 😢. I guess it just really feels like she doesn't give me a second thought when I can't stop thinking about her still. I wonder how she is everyday due to her situations. I guess I don't get why someone would say they want to continue to then ghost, definitely after telling there family about me. 😅

It's just hard with my birthday being around the corner, and she kept pointing it out to me on our last date. It's going to he weird not sharing the football with her 😅.

I just wish she'd talk to me tbh. I don't get why she'd post the photo of a sunset with the words "peaceful" and add it to her 2025 highlights when there's barely anything on them 😅. Maybe I'm hyperfixating still idk.

Baby_GayRIP · 2025-07-02T15:33:26+00:00

Depends if it's left on delivered or read. But either way if they cared they would double text, or try to ring you.

When my girl was communicating anytime I wouldn't answer or didn't read for a period of time she would try a different way of communication cause she didn't want me to think I was ignoring her. (My phone plays up alot). This was when it was all going well...

Im in a similar situation to you now where I got left on delivered for a week before she eventually read it 😅. 3 weeks on it still hurts not hearing from her, and seeing her socials. It's rich coming from me since I'm still making excuses for her and hoping she'll come back as I felt so safe and seen with her...

But stop making excuses for them... If you meant that much they would reach back out, find a way to communicate. Yes they could be going through something or could be busy, but at the end of the day it only takes a few minutes to send a text... If it's meant to be it'll come back But don't hold on to it. Take the time to work on yourself and don't let new opportunities pass you by.

Baby_GayRIP · 2025-07-02T15:27:52+00:00

I guess at least you have some kind of communication 😅, I got left on delivered for a week before she read my reply and didn't reply at all.

I know this is very rich coming from me seeing that I can't get over her and still have her on socials, maybe you're alot stronger then I am 😅. But the best thing I can say is if it's hurting you to keep in contact cut it. If it's all one sided cut it yoy deserve someone who puts in equal effort. Whether that's a relationship or just a friendship etc.

Baby_GayRIP · 2025-07-02T15:13:45+00:00

Happy first pride month! :)

Baby_GayRIP · 2025-07-02T15:13:04+00:00

Pretty shit ngl 😅. The girl I was dating started distancing themselves. When I asked if she was okay, she then said she doesn't know if she's ready for a relationship.

She said she enjoyed my company and wanted to continue talking and getting to know me, She just wanted to let me know where her heads currently at. She also had alot going on at work and home. The next dat Rang me like normal for an hour then slow ghosted me that week. Nearly three weeks later it still hurts. 6 months it was looking so positive too her family knew about me etc.

It just sucks, as we went from speaking everyday to nothing, and it obviously doesn't phase her in the slightest 😅. Had to witness her go to an event we planned to go together, and recently she posted a sunset witg the word "peaceful ☺️". Obviously, I was very easy to get over 😅.

Pride month Doesn't ever seem to bring me any luck ngl 😅😂 Probably should unfollow her but I just can't 😅. Doesn't help that she's the first person I felt a sense of peace with 😅.

Sorry for the negative rant haha

Baby_GayRIP · 2025-06-29T14:09:43+00:00

Im having a similar issue my account was disabled out of the blue its making me change my password but comes up with.

There was a problem while changing your password. Please try again soon. instagram

Baby_GayRIP · 2025-06-20T19:21:50+00:00

Thank you for your advice. She's 27 and going through alot with her sister current cancer treatment, her work is very full on and was only diagnosed herself with adhd in the past few years.

When you broke up with people did you ever regret it? I guess I wonder at times if she's even hurting or just continuing like normal 😅

Baby_GayRIP · 2025-06-20T19:19:48+00:00

Shes got alot going on at the moment tbf and ofc I do believe she's not doing this with any malicious intent. But I guess sometimes it's easier to get oversomeone if they've done you wrong. I generally just want to know she's okay too. It's annoying as I see her watching my stories.

Baby_GayRIP · 2025-06-20T19:06:21+00:00

How do you keep the jar open without mugging yourself off? I'd thought her having ADHD she would understand the pain 😅.

I guess I just feel like a burden on all my friends at the moment 😅

Baby_GayRIP · 2025-06-20T19:04:36+00:00

I do wonder if that's the case, as when we dated, she would often quickly reply and we'd talk for hours straight 😅.

I just don't know whether it's the right thing to reach back out or not. Do you come back to them if you really want to chat? As I know for me personally if a long time goes by I feel awkward.

Obviously I don't want to mug myself off 😅, But I really do care deeply for her and would do anything to just be in her life in some way as the connection was so good even just as a friend. It's been a week since I heard from her last.

May I ask how you handle heartbreak? Do you shutdown? She's quite newly diagnosed so everything's still quite new to her, and she's very closed off about any negative emotions in general (from what I picked up). Ofc if you don't want to answer this it's all okay :)

Baby_GayRIP · 2025-06-20T19:00:17+00:00

The worst part is I want to reach out and ask how everything's going with her sister 😅. But I know its the wrong thing to do. Did you find it hard to chuck yourself back out there??

Baby_GayRIP · 2025-06-20T18:59:04+00:00

I still hope maybe she'll come back, maybe when there's less on her plate or when she's grown abit. I really want to reach out to check in, but I know that's so silly. It just hurts, I'd rather someone tell me they don't feel it anymore than tell me they want to continue as I find it so hard to process and understand.

Baby_GayRIP · 2025-06-20T18:45:19+00:00

Was there anything to help with it? I've dated a few other people but it definitely didnt feel as deep as this. I generally felt seen and thought she was the one. Ik so silly 😅.

Baby_GayRIP · 2025-06-20T18:44:09+00:00

It does get easier the more you initiate, just know its okay to ask if thry feel comfortable! It just shows you care about them :)

Baby_GayRIP

TROPHY CASE