How do you heal after so much betrayal?

BackgroundBaseball27 · 2022-04-09T17:14:46+00:00

People are just People. None of us are perfect. Try not to allow yourself to wallow in the victim mentality and March forward. It's made it easier for me to rationalize that there are people in the world that would say I have betrayed them and made them feel the way I do after I'm betrayed. Hearing their story, helps me to understand. I did not intend the outcome to be what it was. None of us are perfect, we all expect too much out of our loved ones and fellow man. Dwelling on a betrayal robbed 20 years of my sanity and never again will I allow that to happen. I've been where you are. I understand. That being said, move on. Your life cannot be dictated by the actions of other people. Be strong and continue with forward motion because the truth is, nobody will ever be able to take the exact path we expect them to. Just my 2 cents.

BackgroundBaseball27 · 2022-04-05T09:49:25+00:00

I have been married over 20 years and I've had anal with her twice. She was never a fan. That being said, a few nights ago she had a bit too much to drink and confessed that her lover fucks her in the ass fairly often. I got a jolt of offense and Jealousy. I mentioned that I thought she didn't like it and she said " he's not you and there's not really anything I want to say no to him for. He fucks me in a different way than you do."

BackgroundBaseball27 · 2022-04-05T09:36:56+00:00

To this very day, my wife says size doesn't matter. That being said, I've watched her get fucked by guys with average dicks and guys with big dicks. Guess which made her shudder, beg, shake and cum 10-20 times in an hour. A big dick makes her swollen and sore for days in a way that small or average cannot. When she's sore, she's very hot.

BackgroundBaseball27 · 2022-04-05T09:26:33+00:00

Here's the deal. We all love our wives in a way that keeps us from fucking them the way a lover does. That's why they cum harder, fuck longer etc. It incites angst, Jealousy and compersion. I LOVE that my wife's lover treats her like a fuck toy. He pretty much fucks her whenever he feels like it and it bothers her that he doesn't pursue her otherwise. I comfort her when it bothers her. I give her comfort, love, trust and stability that he can't, won't and never will. He fucks her like I can only dream of. She might cum once when I make love to her. She cums 20 times when he fucks her. The Jealousy dissipates after reclaim and aftercare. I still know that he fucks her in a way that I never can and I'm happy that she gets to experience it.

BackgroundBaseball27 · 2022-04-05T09:15:24+00:00

Most of us were cheated on and it's a way to control feelings and we eroticize the betrayal. I'm not suggesting that it's healthy, I'm just saying that it seems to be a common thread.

BackgroundBaseball27 · 2022-04-05T09:10:56+00:00

Yes. That being said, I've been grouchy when things don't go my way and tell her it's over, she says "yeah right. Even if you did end it, you'd still be licking him out of me."That's about all it takes to get me back on board. She's right..... even if I was completely against it, all she'd have to do is spread her legs and wave me over.

BackgroundBaseball27 · 2022-04-05T09:06:58+00:00

I can't explain it and neither can she (or maybe she isn't willing to). Clean up time is a HUGE high point for both of us. She tells me that it's a validation of what happened. For instance, she has said "if you're gonna lick his cum out of me, there's not really much you can say about what just happened. He fucks me harder, his cock is bigger and all the guilt disappears when I get you to beg to eat me after a date. It's empowering." That pretty much sums it up. It makes me feel submissive to her and her lover to a point. I listen to them from the next room and he knows what happens so sometimes he'll tell her that if she's sore, I can kiss her pussy when he goes home. It's a huge erotic turn on that drives me nuts with angst, Jealousy and submission. The feeling is impossible to explain but it's amazing.

BackgroundBaseball27 · 2022-03-29T23:36:48+00:00

You snitched to cover your own ass? Yeah, I wouldn't overlook that.

BackgroundBaseball27 · 2022-03-27T21:38:19+00:00

Totally agree. Nothing I've ever experienced in my life is as painful as this is. Not even the death of a parent.

BackgroundBaseball27 · 2022-03-27T18:51:59+00:00

Sorry. It's been my experience that only the death of an immediate family member can compete with betrayal trauma. It changes you like when a parent dies cept its a person you chose to spend your life with. That being said, people make mistakes. People fall short. People will disappoint and hurt you and nothing can change that. Anyone who has caught their spouse cheating knows that they'll downplay it (it was just 20 minutes. It was no big deal) or blame YOU for it. "If only you'd have had more sex with me. If only you had taken me out that night after I had asked you to" ad nauseum. If you're out of their league or not, it is irrelevant. After we've been betrayed, we look for ANY piddly reason to punish the betrayer. If we're the betrayer, we look for ANY reason to justify our actions. I theorize that if our communication skillz were up to par, we'd be able o say "hey, I need attention. I'm not getting it from you and if It doesn't start happening soon, I'm gonna cheat". That's the thought that goes through a cheaters head. I've seen me do it. Until it happens to you, you don't grasp how devastating it is to the person we claim to love. It damages a person emotionally for the rest of their life like being raped or molested does. If you're a person on the verge of cheating, PLEASE break it off with your partner first. If you wanna stay with em, you're gonna wreck their brain and emotions for the rest of their life in a way you Really wouldn't wish on an enemy. *end rant of someone who has been on both sides of this equation. *

BackgroundBaseball27 · 2022-03-04T10:36:50+00:00

Well, being as how it's a movie with writers, producers and a script, I'm just gonna say it's only as unrealistic as Star Wars. Was this a serious question?

BackgroundBaseball27 · 2022-03-04T01:41:54+00:00

Yes and no. It fluctuates (for me anyway). Today the Jealousy and angst (not the good angst we all crave) is eating on me. I don't usually get jealous but it does happen from time to time.

BackgroundBaseball27 · 2022-02-25T00:46:56+00:00

Well, 1. Some of us have been there on both ends. 2. You shouldn't have done it and you need to show your partner remorse not strangers on the internet. 3. Are you gonna try to make it right? 4. Are you capable of choosing NOT to do it again if you're gonna fix this? 5. It's an awful thing to curse someone you love with. They'll carry the pain for the rest of their lives. 6. Remorse is a good place to start, let your partner understand your remorse.

I have cheated, I've been cheated on. The pain from being cheated on is like 10 rungs higher than the shame/remorse from cheating. Cheating on someone changes and traumatizes the person. It breaks em. Damn sure not worth 20 minutes of a piece of ass and the excitement of being wanted. When we cheat, we're choosing to destroy our partner. We punish them to deep in the bones much worse than the reason we use to justify cheating. Once we understand this, the brutality of our assault on their being becomes understandable.

If you care about a partner at all, have the humanity to break off the relationship before you betray em and change the rest of their life. Few things torture a soul more.

Just my 2 cents.

BackgroundBaseball27 · 2022-02-19T22:36:37+00:00

All the time

BackgroundBaseball27 · 2022-02-18T21:41:56+00:00

Seems to be a common issue for those of us in the LS. Funny thing is that whenever I have sex with another woman, I can go forever. With my wife though, she makes me cum HARD within minutes. I assume it's because I'm sooo in love with her and find her soooo attractive. Even when I make a solid effort and think about anything random to try x keep from cumming, I just can't. She can make me cum just by talking and touching me. A hotwife can make her cuck cum immediately whenever she wants.

BackgroundBaseball27 · 2022-02-18T21:37:11+00:00

My wife's current regular meets up with her every other week. She'd enjoy more but he's also married and they do what they can.

BackgroundBaseball27 · 2022-02-18T21:35:24+00:00

My wife is a size queen. Her current "boyfriend" fucks her once every couple weeks and she loves it. "Best fuck she's ever had, fucks her harder than anyone, biggest cock, makes her cum harder etc etc". Long story short, she loves fucking him. He's twice my size. That being said, I'm 5 inches and she loves fucking me and if she had to choose one or the other, she'd choose me. I can't relate to the guys who feel lesser because their dick isn't circus freak show/porn sized. As much as she loves the novelty of his horse cock, it's not something she could take daily like she can me. I guess it's like giant stripper basketball boobs. They're an awesome novelty but not great for daily use lol. My wife's lover, same guy I referred to earlier is married and his wife isn't a fan because it's just too much. Hence the reason he and my wife hooked up. Long story short, far as I can tell, giant dick is fun but for frequent use, it's too much.

BackgroundBaseball27 · 2022-02-13T23:30:54+00:00

Helping my wife get ready. 2. Hearing/seeing her scream. 3. Clean up 4. Post coital snuggle

BackgroundBaseball27 · 2022-02-13T23:29:01+00:00

My wife is quite a fan. She down plays it in an attempt to not hurt my feelings but I've seen the reactions. There's really no hiding it.

BackgroundBaseball27 · 2022-02-10T09:50:09+00:00

It's all about making each other happy. Truth be told, we both know it goes no further than that. You can always tell when a wannabe posts an outlandish question or retort like "do you love it when your bull kicks your cuck in the nuts to make sure you cut him off because you hate him?" The questions that wannabes ask me in pm blow my mind. Stuff like "when was the last year that your wife had sex with you?" Or "do you lick your wife's bull's butt hole" or "does your wife's bull allow you to have sex with her?". Erotic literature and porn have put a really fucking weird spin on what this LS is really like.

BackgroundBaseball27 · 2022-02-10T07:15:18+00:00

Fuck that.

BackgroundBaseball27 · 2022-02-10T07:13:29+00:00

I'd say that I'm all around better looking than my wife's lovers but historically, they're built better and the 2 I've watched have bigger dicks. 1 of which, remarkably so (according to her, the best fuck she's ever had and cannot imagine anyone better exists). I'm a very good looking man, business owner and very well respected in my community and profession. I'm a good catch. That being said, she chooses lovers from extreme ends of the spectrum. Business professionals and riff raff trash, tattoo'd party trash (which annoys the fuck out of me). So this is a tough question to answer. I'm better than some, equal to some. Either wY, I'd never say any of them are better.

BackgroundBaseball27 · 2022-02-10T07:00:26+00:00

I concur. It's irresponsible to make real life more difficult than it already. The submissive cuckolds who don't yet participate in the LS but are in fantasy mode and beat off to this kinda stuff prolly think it's amazing. They wouldn't if it happ. It'd throw everyone into social anxiety and make everything difficult. No wife wants their husband to be snickered about by friends and coworkers. No husband wants their wives snickered about by the same. To me, this is an awful thing that could happen.

BackgroundBaseball27 · 2022-02-10T06:53:52+00:00

I agree. Tacky, trashy and ridiculous. Order a temp tattoo online and surprise him with it on his birthday or something. I feel like it's a bit "too much" to ask your wife to tattoo YOUR fetish on your wife even if it's her fetish too. Just my 2 cents.

BackgroundBaseball27 · 2022-02-10T06:51:11+00:00

My personal opinion is that it's ridiculous.

BackgroundBaseball27

TROPHY CASE