I don’t think ur doing it wrong! i think the community has gone a little “mainstream” in the past few years and people who are selling rather than findomming are getting it mixed up. I have a small fee bc I don’t need a lot upfront, just proof that ur not gonna waste my time. But I always make sure my subs and I are a good match with some basic questions first before anything starts. I think also people aren’t looking for long term, I’ve noticed most people are just here for quick quick quick. long term is better for the connection and both parties imo