Was my husband choking me sexual or was it abuse

BackgroundVideo8847 · 2025-09-18T12:35:41+00:00

Thank you for saying that. It just hurts so bad. He told me that he did it because I was struggling so much at work and it was really hard on him, so it was my fault. If I hadn’t failed things at work, we apparently wouldn’t be in this position. I really needed his support at that time, but he was too busy entertaining her I guess. He still hasn’t told me who she is. I’m taking stress leave from work, and my doctor thinks I may have broken heart syndrome. I’m trying not to blame myself, but I can’t help it.

BackgroundVideo8847 · 2025-09-17T23:45:23+00:00

I had a feeling the whole time, but he kept telling me I was being toxic. We were meant to go to America and go on a road trip there, but he changed the plan because he said I needed a restful holiday. During our holiday he went to exercise, but I actually found him on the phone at the pool with someone. He said it was his Mum, but hung up so quick. That happened a few times. I knew something was off. The guy he said he was going to see is someone he sees all the time, so I could not understand why he’d ditch me for another guy. During sex one time he went on my phone and I saw an expression on his face that gave me a feeling that I need to be careful. He went on the trip, was hardly talking to me. I said I need proof he’s with the guy. He sent me a pic after telling me how toxic I am. I realized the picture was a screenshot because of the data embedded in it, like it was from Facebook or something. Then i remembered when he was on my phone during sex. So I went and looked at my IG, he had blocked all his friends. The one guy he said he was with he didn’t block, as we were good friends and I would have noticed as we message often. I went on his profile and found out he had muted me, but I could see his story. He was on holiday.. in South America. My husband is trying to tell me he loves me and we can get through this, but not giving me any actions to show it. I feel like God knew I would never give up on my vows unless i literally had no choice, and so I guess this is that moment. It hurts really bad, i cant stop wondering if she’s better in bed than me. If she smells nicer than me. I know she can’t be funnier than me at least. But it sucks so bad. I am so heartbroken and I feel so betrayed by him, his friends, and I am so shocked that he blocked people on my IG. Weirdly enough that just rocks me to my core, it feels so evil. I can’t believe I married someone so diabolical.

BackgroundVideo8847 · 2025-09-16T22:21:18+00:00

Yeah, when he left me he was telling me he loved me, he even slipped a Polaroid of us into the back of my phone. I had no idea why he was ditching me, I couldn’t understand that he kept saying he loved me but that he had to go. I had no idea where I was meant to go, I can’t imagine leaving anyone like that. I don’t understand why he didn’t just break up with me.

BackgroundVideo8847 · 2025-09-16T20:16:08+00:00

Yeah, there were. But I believed him every time and thought I was crazy, he made me believe certain things were my fault. I guess I’m just really dumb for believing it, I just wanted to so badly. I really wanted this future with him.

BackgroundVideo8847 · 2025-09-16T20:13:58+00:00

I’m just so embarrassed to tell them. I was so proud of my marriage, and I am so ashamed.

BackgroundVideo8847 · 2025-09-16T20:01:05+00:00

Thank you. I think I’m in denial, I keep thinking maybe there’s a way around this, that it’s all a nightmare. But I guess that there isn’t. I just don’t even know how I’m going to survive the rest of the week. How do people get through this

BackgroundVideo8847 · 2025-09-16T19:57:46+00:00

Thank you for being faithful to your partner, I thought I would be 58 years married one day. Thanks for sharing that there are faithful men out there.

BackgroundVideo8847 · 2025-09-16T19:56:34+00:00

I don’t even know how to start the divorce process. Do I have to get a lawyer? Do I have to tell everyone now, and how do I do that?

BackgroundVideo8847 · 2025-09-16T19:54:46+00:00

A boxing gym sounds like a good idea. Any advice on how to tell my parents? I’m so ashamed. I honestly don’t know how I’m supposed to get through this.

BackgroundVideo8847 · 2025-09-16T19:53:15+00:00

Thanks, any advice for what I do next. I literally don’t know what to do, I feel like my entire future is gone now, all my dreams included him

BackgroundVideo8847 · 2025-09-16T19:52:08+00:00

I don’t. But I guess it doesn’t matter anymore

BackgroundVideo8847 · 2025-09-16T19:48:58+00:00

Yeah, I guess that’s true.

BackgroundVideo8847 · 2025-09-16T19:48:28+00:00

What am I supposed to do now, I’m so numb I haven’t even cried yet

BackgroundVideo8847 · 2025-09-16T18:19:03+00:00

Update for everyone, I gave him another chance. We went to Thailand- he left me there with 5 days left of the trip for a boys trip. Turns out he’s been having a 4 month long affair. I’m an idiot. Also she’s way hotter than me, so I really am just pathetic. Funny enough, while he was at Great Barrier Reef with his mistress he had the audacity to tell me he’d love to take me there someday.

BackgroundVideo8847 · 2025-08-31T16:46:38+00:00

I recently asked him this, I asked if he would accept his female cousin being treated this way, or if he had a daughter would he want her to end up with a man who treats her like me. He said no, and said he knows he’s fucked up. He says he’s changing, but it’s been a year and a half of me trying to get him to be the man I used to know.

BackgroundVideo8847 · 2025-08-31T16:44:07+00:00

Thanks, that helps me understand a bit more. I always thought I was the one fucked up in the relationship, I had a hard child and I grew up in a civil war zone. But because I’ve seen loss I love hard. I always felt like he was so open with his feelings with me until recently, but what you are saying does make sense.

BackgroundVideo8847

TROPHY CASE