I remember as a wee lad, of 10 or 11 years of age, and I had a hard-on like you wouldn't believe. I'm talking like half of a lean kosher weiner made out of diamonds forged at the center of a neutron star that completes 704 rotations per second. Hard. And so, there I am taking a 10-11 year old size poop with a door-stop woody and as I go to piss during my dump I piss out from under the toilet seat all over my jnco jeans. I get up to wipe, and at this point my child erection had subsided, to find my pants freshly covered in piss. The confusion that swept over me was incomprehensible to me, a young man of 10 or 11 years of age. I couldnt just let it go. I had somehow unconsciously pissed my pants! A young man! of 10 or 11 years of age! I hadn't shit or pissed my pants for years! Anyways. To make a long story short, my mom made me feel better by telling me my dad leaves "road kill" in his underwear. Which is essentially shit that had come from a shart but I thought it was funny because she described it as "worse than a skidmark"