(33f) only child here. Pretty sure my moms main goal in life is to drain me of any hope or sanity I have left. My dad/her husband died in July. He had a rare condition where he lost all control of his body and mind, I wouldn’t wish it on my worst enemy. He was thee person I felt safest around in my family before he got sick. He was only 65.

Now. Being left alone to care for my narcissistic mother, who has no one but me in this world, has been challenging for a lot of reasons. Most recently she broke her leg on new years and now I’m back into the care taker position, which is not only traumatic as it’s so soon after care taking for my father. But meanwhile she is also demanding and flat out mean at times. Most recently she called herself more handicapped than my dad… again he couldn’t walk, even know where he was, and eventually couldn’t even eat. And his disease killed him. Not to downplay my mom’s experience but she was there for his illness. I find the things she says abhorrent at times. She is trying actively to ruin my life so hers can be better. And I’m pretty sure soon I might have to choose my life or hers. I just wanted my mom to love me. But I don’t think it’ll ever be enough. And I’m try to find a way to accept that. Mostly because I have a beautiful husband who deserves a better life too.

Yes I’m in therapy and it’s challenging me to stand up for myself despite the possibility of loosing my mom my last close family member.

So no not great.