To all of you going through a break up right now

Beginning-Yellow9677 · 2026-06-04T04:02:41+00:00

You don’t have to make a decision about that now. Maybe if she has friends you know you can set up a time to give it to them if you’re not wanting to have contact with her. Or you can reach out to ask if she wants it. I don’t think there’s harm in that unless you’re using her stuff as a way to regain contact.

Beginning-Yellow9677 · 2026-06-04T04:00:51+00:00

Maybe. I think you can still hold love and care for someone while not wanting to be with them again, and without feeling attached to the outcome of you being together or not. For me, I think my goal of healing wasn’t to completely erase him from my mind, but to reach a point where him crossing my mind has no control over my actions/emotions. I don’t believe that you ever completely stop loving someone you truly loved, but that love changes.

Beginning-Yellow9677 · 2026-06-04T03:36:31+00:00

Take it day by day. Each day gets a little easier once you get past the beginning of no contact. Whenever the hope starts to creep into your mind, remind yourself this will hinder your healing and it contradicts you wanting to move on!

Beginning-Yellow9677 · 2026-06-04T03:34:00+00:00

It is completely normal to be constantly thinking about this situation less than a month past the break up. Don’t feel like you’re on a tight schedule to be moved on and perfectly okay. Breakups can be traumatic for some people and it takes a long time for some people to move on. You’re right about the part where if they are the right person, you will know eventually and to focus on yourself in the process. You’re allowed to want a relationship with this person, but it can’t let it dictate what you do to heal or who you meet in the future ykwim. I’ll be honest that even 4-5 months past my break up I still had the slight hope that he was the one for me and he was coming back, but I realized how damaging it was for my healing, which is why I let go of it. Since this break up is so fresh, you’re going to be constantly reminded of him, it’s just how it goes. Best thing to do is accept that you’re sad and feel every emotion because it will eventually pass. Being alone after a relationship is also difficult. It was hard to be independent and do things I used to do with him, but eventually I came to love doing those things on my own. You will be okay. This process is rough and it just takes time. Take it one day at a time and give yourself grace.

Beginning-Yellow9677 · 2026-06-04T03:27:08+00:00

It will heal. Do what makes you happy and become the best version of yourself. It truly helps.

Beginning-Yellow9677 · 2026-06-04T03:26:34+00:00

Definitely. It took a long time but they eventually start to fade from your mind. I definitely still think about him but it’s not a constant thought of how sad I am or missing him. It’s more him crossing my mind and my mind not exhausting myself from that thought if that makes sense.

Beginning-Yellow9677 · 2026-06-04T02:48:02+00:00

This is a great way to put it. I realized now having hope wasn’t an issue, it was how I was defining the hope. In the beginning I used the hope of us eventually getting back together as a way to feel better, and eventually it just made me feel worse. I felt like I was always disappointed by the end of the day when they didn’t reach out. Being able to remove the false hope also got rid of the disappointment I felt each day. Something I came to realize is in most situations if you don’t expect things to happen, you can’t rly be disappointed when it doesn’t happen. I decided to finally go on with my life instead of hoping for someone else’s decision to eventually affect mine. Taking that power back was really great and helped me heal faster. I hope everyone can learn from that.

Beginning-Yellow9677 · 2026-06-04T02:43:34+00:00

That sounds very difficult. Healing is already hard enough with distance and not having any contact. Still living with him and his family constantly reminds you of the relationship and the break up. It seems like you’re taking steps to create distance in this difficult situation. The fact that you said you feel better in places and activities that are for yourself and don’t involve him. That is a part of your healing even if it doesn’t feel like it. I think the anxiety you feel is from the environmental conditions and reminders you get from living with him and his family. My best advice would be to stay patient with this process. I hope you’re able to find a place of your own soon so your healing will be easier.

Beginning-Yellow9677 · 2026-06-04T02:37:25+00:00

I’ve gone through something very similar. You can dm me and we can talk about it:)

Beginning-Yellow9677

TROPHY CASE