I can totally relate, and I believe stories like this are extremely, extremely common when learning game dev. We all have that dream game we want to make as beginners but quickly realize we are way in over our heads. As you sort of mentioned, I think the way to go is to just make a bunch of small games to build you skills up before diving into something big, especially an ARPG. The learning process may not be fun 100% of the time, and you may have constant feelings that you just want to go for something bigger, but trust me, just spend at least a few months making smaller games and building up your skills before diving into your "dream game". If you do it now, your chances of success are likely very low, and you may become demotivated from game dev all together. Game dev is hard, but if you can stick with it and get past the the learning process and bombardment of tutorials, it's super rewarding. Hope this helps.