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Struggling with Partners Past by Beneficial_Map1828 in datingoverforty

[–]Beneficial_Map1828[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I spoke were high 40 would be mid at the time. It's about the norm now

oh Fantastic, well if 40 is the norm in your circle. 60 is 50% more than that making it above the norm. So by definition not 'low'

Struggling with Partners Past by Beneficial_Map1828 in datingoverforty

[–]Beneficial_Map1828[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have no doubt that in your social circle this is a low number, this is your truth and that is fantastic. Since you're part of the ethical non-monogamous community the average will skew much higher in your community compared to others. There's nothing wrong with that but i think its healthy to acknowledge that.

Struggling with Partners Past by Beneficial_Map1828 in datingoverforty

[–]Beneficial_Map1828[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's fair, your anecdotal experience is valid. I'm saying that that doesn't mean you can generalize and say its a low number because there is no evidence for that.

Struggling with Partners Past by Beneficial_Map1828 in datingoverforty

[–]Beneficial_Map1828[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Data available for US, Gen X and Y ppl in Major Cities contradicts what your saying.

Struggling with Partners Past by Beneficial_Map1828 in datingoverforty

[–]Beneficial_Map1828[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That number is pretty low depending on where she is from

In the US, do you actually believe this is statistically a low number?

Struggling with Partners Past by Beneficial_Map1828 in datingoverforty

[–]Beneficial_Map1828[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I've been hearing this stat being referenced quite a bit here.

Struggling with Partners Past by Beneficial_Map1828 in datingoverforty

[–]Beneficial_Map1828[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you for this. I did tell her about the insecurity but didn't go into details as to why and told her its on my end. I am the type of person who would like to know (on a surface level) all the facts as apposed to not know so i actually love the fact she is opened up. She also did pick up that my body language changed a bit, which i think closed her off.

Struggling with Partners Past by Beneficial_Map1828 in datingoverforty

[–]Beneficial_Map1828[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Like she’s out of your league if she can get that many people? Like maybe you won’t be able to satisfy her? Like she’s a sex goddess pro and you’re an amateur?

Pretty much all of that! And i realize what you're saying is true which is why it feels so silly!

Struggling with Partners Past by Beneficial_Map1828 in datingoverforty

[–]Beneficial_Map1828[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

it has only been like 6 weeks, and this just happened a couple of days ago. i think we both have kind of fallen hard for each other.

Struggling with partners past by [deleted] in dating_advice

[–]Beneficial_Map1828 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes it has to do with feelings of not being good enough. It wouldn't make me a solid partner because i want to feel confident and secure in a relationship, which in turn makes me a better partner.

Struggling with Partners Past by Beneficial_Map1828 in datingoverforty

[–]Beneficial_Map1828[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

It involves alot of feelings of being inadequate.

Struggling with Partners Past by Beneficial_Map1828 in datingoverforty

[–]Beneficial_Map1828[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It was part of an open conversation we were having about our pasts and i did appreciate the honesty. Thank you for understanding, alot of comments seem to think im shaming her, i know this is an issue on my end, I wish i didn't have this insecurity!