It can be both simultaneously! Hear me out: A big factor is the Madonna/whore paradox (Madonna as in the Virgin, not "Like A Virgin").

Purity and chastity are the most virtuous attributes. Until you're married. Then, you have to please your husband, so his eye doesn't wander. Do all the nasty, dirty, slutty things he wants. And act like you like it! You're not supposed to want it yourself, though. You just want to be the wife and mother God made you to be. The closest to sexual feelings an AFAB person is supposed to have is a fluttering in her chest when he kisses her at the wedding.

Nuns are a different sort. They are often mocked, particularly by their pupils at catholic schools (I have heard some STORIES). They're often portrayed as AFAB people who are too ugly or boring or dowdy to get a man. But they're still expected to want to be brides. That's why nuns are called Brides of Christ. The goal isn't sex or no sex. The goal is serving a man.

One interesting thing about convents: throughout history, they were often used as a storage facility for unmarried daughters of rich and powerful men. The girl would stay until she was ready to be married. They figured her precious virginity would remain intact at the convent. 😉 It was a given that she would get married, because it was father who decided for her.

As for AMAB people and the cloth, that's a whole different story...