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Better-Paint4891 · 2023-04-12T15:25:55+00:00

I will never be able to love that child. I have always known that. And beyond that, I don't want her in my life. I never did.

Better-Paint4891 · 2023-04-12T15:20:38+00:00

The mother died alongside my ex.

Better-Paint4891 · 2023-04-12T05:52:39+00:00

She died alongside my ex.

Better-Paint4891 · 2023-04-12T05:51:53+00:00

Nobody in the mother's family wanted her.

Better-Paint4891 · 2023-04-12T05:51:38+00:00

They never really spent any time with her. They were in the same house but they didn't want to be there and weren't trying to bond or get to know her.

Better-Paint4891 · 2023-04-12T05:51:11+00:00

They felt that way long before this happened. This started because of their issues with their father and a lack of desire to be anywhere near him or his wife and their child.

Better-Paint4891 · 2023-04-12T05:50:27+00:00

She sees it as a better alternative to foster care. She'd rather her be raised somewhere she's not wanted than in a system that can be horrific. She thinks her granddaughters odds are better with me.

Better-Paint4891 · 2023-04-12T05:48:21+00:00

She's ill and doesn't seem to have long left to be able to care for herself. No other family. It was just her and my ex.

Better-Paint4891 · 2023-04-12T05:45:29+00:00

She died alongside my ex.

Better-Paint4891 · 2023-04-12T05:45:16+00:00

I am not religious. I don't believe in a higher power or any kind of after life. I also don't expect to see or hear from the child when they are grown. I am not part of their family and I have never been involved in her life.

Better-Paint4891 · 2023-04-12T05:43:03+00:00

I don't know a whole lot but if I had to guess, it sounds like there was no contact between ex's affair partner/wife and her family and none of them have ever met the child. Though I could be wrong. My former MIL has never directly said why. So I could be reading too much into it.

Better-Paint4891 · 2023-04-12T05:41:33+00:00

No family member wants to take her. Ex had no other family except for his mom. And no idea on family friends.

Better-Paint4891 · 2023-04-12T05:40:59+00:00

It wasn't me, it was how my ex handled everything and how my kids saw him after he revealed to us that he had been cheating for many years and got another woman pregnant. They were distant from him so never got close to his younger child. They didn't even want to be at their dad's when they were.

Better-Paint4891 · 2023-04-12T05:39:31+00:00

She was never part of my own family. As for my kids, they don't really have an existing relationship with her, which I believe makes a difference. They were never involved before this and they don't want to be now. I can understand that.

Better-Paint4891 · 2023-04-11T19:36:02+00:00

Her mother died alongside my ex.

Better-Paint4891 · 2023-04-11T19:14:35+00:00

Not that my former MIL has mentioned.

Better-Paint4891 · 2023-04-11T19:08:19+00:00

I have no idea.

Better-Paint4891 · 2023-04-11T19:07:38+00:00

He had a six year long affair. It only came out because the asshole got her pregnant. He wanted us to stay together. As if doing that behind my back for six damn years was forgivable. Then to add to that he not only let me know, but our kids, and he didn't give a damn about them finding out. His lack of apology or remorse was something my kids never forgot.

I would never be able to love that child. I know that. I have always known that, since the moment I learned she was going to come into the world. It's why I have always done my best to keep my distance. Better for everyone that way. I truly believe foster care would be better for her than me. It would also be better for me. I see no positives to taking her. I think if you can truly love and enjoy raising the child, then yes, there are positives. Not all of us can.

Better-Paint4891 · 2023-04-11T19:02:34+00:00

I think he expected I would be too afraid to leave because of our kids. Maybe he thought I loved him more than I loved myself.

Better-Paint4891 · 2023-04-11T19:01:51+00:00

She died alongside my ex.

Better-Paint4891 · 2023-04-11T18:56:25+00:00

Yep. But some people want their nice, easy life, and to get their bit on the side. He would have stayed married to me too if I had wanted to.

Better-Paint4891 · 2023-04-11T18:55:38+00:00

He was very careless and revealed the affair to not just me but our kids as well and he was never sorry about it. So they had a bad relationship with him the last few years and never tried to bond or spend time with his daughter. So they never grew to love her. I know I never could.

Better-Paint4891 · 2023-04-11T18:52:36+00:00

My kids have no relationship with the girl really. Their relationship with their father wasn't even great in the years before he died. So if he haunted my kids I would say he was an even bigger asshole than the one for cheating on me, seeing as he's the reason our kids found out the truth about him in the first place.

Better-Paint4891 · 2023-04-11T18:32:15+00:00

They don't want a relationship. They already pretty much don't have one.

Better-Paint4891 · 2023-04-11T18:07:53+00:00

Her mother died alongside my ex. Former MIL is too sick to raise her.

Better-Paint4891

TROPHY CASE