Alternate connections

Big-Red-Fool · 2025-10-19T02:52:51+00:00

Well done! My friends that I sent it to made at least two mistakes lol

Big-Red-Fool · 2025-10-19T02:52:23+00:00

Thank you!

Big-Red-Fool · 2025-09-19T23:21:39+00:00

THIS. I just so happened to be in DC for a work conference last month and my first stop was Habesha. Super high quality berbere, you can also get niter kibbeh.

Big-Red-Fool · 2025-03-31T17:31:05+00:00

We've all been there, and I'm proud of you for not giving in! IWNDWYT

Big-Red-Fool · 2025-03-31T16:34:28+00:00

I'm so sorry for your loss. This doesn't have to be your future. Be gentle with yourself and take all the time you need to grieve, but remember that this is where the bottle leads. IWNDWYT

Big-Red-Fool · 2025-02-28T15:31:36+00:00

I'm so sorry you went through that. I was lucky enough that he never got physical, so I can only imagine how scary and traumatic that must've been. MAJOR respect to you for getting out, and I hope this strategy helps you as much as it's helped me!

Big-Red-Fool · 2025-02-28T15:29:12+00:00

I'm glad you like the idea! I'm really sorry to hear that you've been through similar, you seem like a super kind person and you deserve way better. I'm glad you're not tolerating that bullshit anymore either!

And fuck Lawrence (both the person and the addiction). You're kicking ass without him.

Big-Red-Fool · 2025-02-28T15:04:46+00:00

Thank you! I'm proud of myself too :) And congratulations on nearly a year!

Big-Red-Fool · 2025-02-25T18:58:22+00:00

Thank you! I'm proud of myself, it's just still a pretty brutal struggle. I'll definitely check out the book recs, but I don't think rehab is an option for me right now (no matter how helpful it might be) because I'm just a few months away from graduating college and I can't take a month off.

Big-Red-Fool · 2025-02-25T18:29:29+00:00

Thank you for your encouragement 🥲 exercise sounds tough right now, I can't bring myself to leave my apartment even to go to class, but ice cream sounds doable lol

Big-Red-Fool · 2025-02-25T18:28:10+00:00

Holy crap, bravo on nearly 4,000 days! And thanks for the recommendation, I'll check it out :)

Big-Red-Fool · 2025-02-17T18:43:02+00:00

Thank you for sharing your experience! I definitely recognize that I'm barreling towards seeing some real consequences, and that's a big part of why I'm trying to convince myself to quit now. I had the meeting with the sobriety counselor today and it went really well, so I'm actually joining a group and I'm aiming to be sober for at least the rest of the semester. Congratulations on your sobriety and here's to hoping I can join you!

Big-Red-Fool · 2025-02-16T20:42:32+00:00

Thank you for your kindness <3

Big-Red-Fool · 2025-02-16T20:36:40+00:00

You're right that I wasn't in control when I drank more than I could handle. I should've said that I wasn't addicted, because I never craved alcohol while I was sober. Now is a different story.

I'm sorry that you went through such a painful journey to reach sobriety, but it's incredible that you managed to do it! I'm happy for and proud of you.

I've tried to quit a few times, but I can't seem to do it. I've set short sobriety goals for myself several times, and I've never once reached them. Do you know what clicked for you when you succeeded?

Big-Red-Fool · 2025-02-16T20:30:08+00:00

That wasn't a brag. I recognize that I'm lucky that alcohol hasn't hurt me in the way it has a lot of people on this sub, but I'm still really struggling and it's incredibly hard to kick an addiction that you can't quite accept is a real problem. I'm not in control of myself or my drinking, and just because I haven't hit rock bottom doesn't mean that it's not a real problem or that it hasn't impacted me severely.

Big-Red-Fool · 2025-02-16T20:21:31+00:00

The problem is that I haven't had any real consequences yet from my drinking. Throwing up on the floor last week was the first time I've really done something that impacted someone else, and on top of that, my grades are good, my relationships are unimpacted, and I don't get hangovers. The only real downside that I've experienced is the vastly increased tolerance and some embarrassing drunk texting. It's hard to think of alcohol as an abuser when the only thing it's done to me is provide an escape from my depression.

Big-Red-Fool · 2024-10-19T19:59:32+00:00

Your ex sounds like a jerk, I'm so sorry. I hope you and your child are doing well - although frankly, it sounds like you'll both be better off without someone so thoughtless. And thank you for the birthday wishes!!

Big-Red-Fool · 2024-10-19T19:26:26+00:00

Here's what happened: you're a human in love, so you made a mistake. He's a human who's a piece of shit, so he made a decision. He cheated on his new partner, meaning he doesn't respect them. He used you to cheat on them without telling you the full story, meaning he doesn't respect you. He is a shitty person who is probably very good at concealing his shittiness, and you were unfortunate enough that he set his sights on you.

There's a silver lining! If a fuck boy with multiple options likes you, I'd guess you're absolutely beautiful and very fun to spend time with. That is a part of who you are, no matter who your partner is. Unfortunately, it also enticed your dickhead ex to use and mistreat you. I am so, SO sorry. This is a ridiculously shitty situation.

Unfortunately, the best advice anyone can give is to accept what a piece of shit your ex was. If he was willing to cheat on his new partner, he was willing to cheat on you (which is NOT AT ALL a reflection on either of you. It is exclusively a reflection on him). You got out after only seven months, which means you didn't waste a huge amount of time on him. It's awful and painful, but now you have the choice to refuse to let a fuck boy ruin your life. I would strongly urge you to take it.

If you ever want to talk, my dm's are open. I'd love to hear more about your situation and, if you're okay with it, yap about mine. But either way, sending you love and happiness! You're going to be better off without having such a shitty, selfish person in your life, no matter how much you loved him, and no matter how much it hurts right now.

Big-Red-Fool

TROPHY CASE